Journey to a New Day
by light4dawn
Summary: In New Moon: Edward calls, but Bella answers the phone instead of Jacob because people do not answer other people's phones! Jacob/Bella story with no rushed trip to Italy. Of course, doesn't mean it's 15 chapters of domestic life! How could Bella's life , immersed in a life of vampires and werewolves, possibly be dull? And Victoria's still out there.
1. Old Friends and New Foes

**_This is my first fanfic. I have never written anything other than essays and letters before this. The first three chapters were a bit of a learning curve for me, but I like to believe I improved over the course of this story. Happy reading!_**

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><p><em><em>Thanks go out to Edwardsfavoritebrunette and itsange, both from Project Team Beta, who have beta'ed this chapter for me.<em>_

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><p><strong>Disclaimer<br>**_The following is based on the characters, settings, and events that appear in the Twilight series by Stephenie Meyer. All recognizable and/or trademarked elements, including, but not limited to, characters, settings, events, plot points, etcetera, are the property of their respective owners. No copyright infringement is intended. The author of this specific story (known by the pen name, light4dawn) is not associated with Stephenie Meyer, or any affiliates involved with the Twilight series. This work is intended for entertainment purposes only, and no profit is knowingly generated as a result of it. Only aspects entirely unique and original to this story are owned by this story's author._

**Chapter 1 - Old Friends and New Foes**

_Chapter 1 begins on March 18th, 2006. Alice arrived in Forks two days ago, after seeing Bella jump off the cliff. After two days without speaking to her, Jacob surprises Bella with a visit. They argue, apologize, and share a very tender moment together. They are holding each other, and Jacob is about to kiss a very indecisive Bella when the phone rings..._

The phone rang and rescued me from a decision I wasn't ready to make. I quickly reached for it to avoid what had seemed inevitable a moment ago.

"Hello?" I answered.

There was no reply.

"Hello? Swan residence, Bella speaking. Can I help you?" Maybe we had a bad connection. Maybe it was some kids making crank calls.

"Hello? Is anyone there?" I asked once more.

"Bella, hang up. If it's important, whoever it is will call back," Jacob said impatiently.

I shrugged, decided he was right, and hung up.

I turned around, and faced a sad, vulnerable, and disappointed Jacob. The phone call had distracted me enough that I had forgotten what had been about to happen moments before, but the look of rejection on Jacob's face, brought me back to kiss that never was.

"Jake…"

"It's okay, Bella. I told you I won't give up, and I'll always be here for you, no matter what. So, here I am." He understood I wasn't ready, and yet held nothing against me.

"You should be with a girl who can give you what you need and deserve."I walked to him, wrapped my arms around his waist, and rested my forehead on his chest.

"If she isn't you, then she's not who I want."

Again, I felt the need to hold on to him forever, to stake my claim. I wanted Jake to be mine, but it was selfish, and ultimately destructive, for us both, especially him.

"You don't deserve this, Jacob. You don't deserve to be hurt like this. Seeing you in pain hurts me, too." Yet, if I really cared for him, shouldn't I be able to let him go?

"Don't ever worry about hurting me. Nothing you do can come close to hurting me as much as it would if you _weren't_ in my life. I'd rather be your friend forever, never touching you differently, or share anything more than what we have now, than to lose you. I don't care if you're with me because you need me, or that you're even using me. I just need to know you care about me, trust me, and I make you happy." Jacob's lips were close to mine, his breath warm on my face.

It seemed he always knew what I needed to hear. Somehow, even when he was the one in pain, he always found the right things to say to make my pain, guilt, and suffering lessen.

He took me in his arms, his soft flesh bringing me into his warmth. Jacob's touch, soothed me, keeping the hole in my chest from staying empty. When he held me, I felt love radiating from his body, infiltrating the walls I had built around myself. I held on, my eyes closed, and drifted into the imagined world where Jacob took away my hurt and gave me my life back. In this world, I was brought to life by a warm, moist touch that woke my sleeping heart. No, that wasn't in my imagined universe. Jacob had kissed my bare neck. It was nothing more than a peck, but the heat from his lips, and the unexpected nature of it, stunned me. I couldn't move and realized I wasn't breathing. He released me, looked into my eyes, and smiled.

"I have to go. I need to check in at Harry's, and your _friend_ is probably waiting for you," he said.

I had almost forgotten about Alice. Of course, thinking of her now made me feel strangely guilty, but before thought up anything to reassure him, Jake smiled and said, "I love you Bells, I really do, and I'll be back, soon. Don't go anywhere." And he was gone.

Alice appeared at my front door as soon as Jacob left.

"Bella, I can't decide if you subconsciously seek out monsters, or if they're the ones that gravitate to you. I fully expect a sociopath to be madly in love with you the next time I visit. Of course, that might be too tame for the likes of you," Alice commented as she walked into the house.

"Alice, Jake's a really good friend who's been taking care of me," I replied. "If it weren't for him, I'd be completely lost, and probably dead. He's the only light in my life right now, so please don't."

"Okay, Bella. I didn't mean anything by it. I'm just concerned for your safety, and I want you to be happy." Alice was apologetic.

"So, I guess you have to get going now, before anyone notices where you are." I wanted to change the subject. Speaking to her had the same effect as talking about her with Jake. I cared for both of them so much, and hearing them express their hatred for each other hurt me.

Alice shrugged. What did that mean? "What? You don't have to go?"

She smiled. It was a familiar smile I'd seen before. She was about to bend the rules. "We were all instructed not to contact you, or check on you in any way, but since he's already… Maybe I'll stay a _little_ longer."

I was so happy I jumped up and threw my arms around her neck, and probably would have knocked her over if she weren't stronger than on Olympic weight lifter. After the initial elation faded, I wondered about what she had said. "What do you mean 'since he's already'? Since _who's_ already _what_?"

Alice looked at me innocently and asked, "What do you mean Bella? I don't know what you're talking about."

"Alice, you know I heard correctly, so why don't you tell me because I won't stop asking, especially now that I know you want to hide it from me."

"Look, Bella, I'm not supposed to be here. I wasn't even supposed to look for you, and now I'm sure he's angry with me."

"Wait, I thought you said he was travelling and only checks in every few months. You said he's really angry, as in present tense. How would he know you were checking on me? Does this have something to do with my previous question? Since _who's_ already _what_?" My voice grew louder with every word.

Alice sighed again. If there was one thing about her, she was incapable of keeping secrets from her friends and family.

"Okay, fine. I made the mistake of telling Rosalie what I saw, and after I left, she called Edward and told him. He called here just a few minutes ago to confirm if it was true, but you answered the phone, so he knows my vision was wrong."

I didn't know why, but I was angry. It surprised me. I thought I'd be elated if Edward called, even if all he did was hear my voice and hang up. These past months, all I wanted was some contact with Edward. I had sworn to myself, over and over, that I'd take anything. I would've been willing to accept a sigh, a look, anything, as long as it was Edward; yet, I had gotten just that, and I was furious. Perhaps, not quite furious. If I were honest, I was more hurt than anything else. It only confirmed he didn't love me anymore. I had spent so much time risking my life to hear his voice, but the sound of _my_ voice didn't even move _him_ to speak to me.

"He can't do that! It's not fair!" I shouted. "He can't disappear from my life, taking all of you with him, forbidding you from contacting me, promising me he'll never come back, that it'll be as if he's never existed, and then decide to _check in_ on me!" I felt tears well up in my eyes against my will. I was overwrought with frustration and pain. "He leaves without giving me a good reason. One day, we're in blissful love, and then he doesn't want me anymore. Now, just as I'm beginning to fill the emptiness inside me, as I'm starting to come back to life, he calls and hangs up? Is he trying to find the perfect opportunity to reappear, so he can destroy me for good?" Tears rolled down my cheeks.

Alice gave me a pained look and bowed her head down, ashamed. "Bella, we should have said something. I should have at least said goodbye, no matter what Edward asked of me. I'm sorry. And you're wrong about Edward. He thought you were dead. He only wanted to make sure that you hadn't…" Alice didn't finish her sentence.

"Hadn't what, Alice? Hadn't _killed_ myself? Was he afraid he might have to live for all eternity with the _guilt_ of killing me? For _that_, he had to _call_ me? He couldn't just call _you_? He couldn't wait a day or two to look up a newspaper article or something?" I was consumed by emotion and my body shook while my words sputtered out between sobs. "Since when did _a_ _Cullen_ have trouble finding information? I guess it doesn't matter to him that it _tortures_ me to be reminded of him. All my efforts now go into keeping myself together."

"Bella, you don't know everything. _Think_ about him, Bella, about what he's like, not what he said to you that day." Alice was pleading, but I didn't want to hear about Edward. It was too painful.

"Alice, don't. Don't make me think about him, or that day. It's taken _months_ to come back to this half life I'm living. It's taken all my strength, and all of Jacob's patience and affection, to live again. Please, don't ask me to think about _him_." I slowly eased into calm once Jacob's name escaped my lips. _Jacob_ was the one who had saved me. I knew _he_ loved me with all he had, and he would never leave. So, why was I still broken and alone?

"Okay, Bella. I'll do whatever you ask."

Alice and I spent the rest of the researching colleges. It was her idea. I had been neglecting—no, downright avoiding—this task. She insisted I had to apply, and if I decided not go, I could always say no later. We dug around for whatever applications I had, and she ran over to the old Cullen place and got others. I guessed they had been intended for her or Edward.

It had gotten late, and I had put everything away to start dinner, when the doorbell rang. I looked at Alice, wondering why she didn't announce our visitor in advance, but her irritated face told me who it was.

I answered the door to Jake who stood with his arms crossed in front of him.

"Hey, Jake, I–" He walked past me and straight to Alice. I wasn't used to being ignored by him.

He stood inches from her, probably trying to look menacing. "Listen, leech–" Jacob began.

"Jake, her name's Alice."

"Okay, fine. _Alice, _we need to know if you're leaving soon. The treaty line's causing problems." Jacob loomed over her, a giant next to her petite frame.

Alice went up on her toes, leaned her head forward, and shot back at him, "Don't worry, _dog_. I'm leaving today, so go tell your leader you can roam around wherever you want. I don't get it though, what's the hurry? Not enough land in La Push for the doggie Olympics?" Alice taunted. She tried but failed miserably at looking even remotely threatening. Under different circumstances, it would have been quite amusing.

"Look, not that _you're_ any help, but we picked up a fresh trail for that red-headed leech, and it's gone off our territory. Normally, I couldn't care less, as long as she stayed away, but this one's after Bella. So, yeah, I want to _roam around_ on your land. If you don't mind, we'd like to kill the bloodsucker, that's trying to kill Bella, because of her association with all of _you._" Jake pointed accusingly at Alice.

"Sorry, I didn't mean… You're right. If only I'd seen Victoria coming back for Bella," Alice answered.

Suddenly, she looked up, staring at Jacob accusingly and spat out, "If I could see past you and your hounds from hell, we'd have been here long ago. Your presence has completely muddied my ability to see!" I had never known Alice to be so…rude. It only lasted a moment, before she composed herself and finished her speech with, "Thank you, Jacob, for taking care of Bella all this time. You're right, we caused this problem, and we'll fix it. I'll call the rest of my family."

"Look, we don't need, or want, your help. We can protect Bella as long as you, and your coven, don't get in our way. Besides, you apparently can't see anything when we're involved, which I have to say is the only good news I've had from your visit. What do you propose to do for us, give weather reports? Believe it or not, we do get the weather channel on the rez," Jake snickered with an expression full of bitterness, arrogance, and disdain.

"I can rip apart a vampire just as well you, and _you've_ been unable to catch her. She has special talents, you know. Hers is a supernatural ability to evade danger. Exactly what do _you_ have to get past _that_? Is there one among you who can see her moves before she makes them? Oh wait, that's _my_ special talent," Alice returned smugly. I guess Jake's attitude was getting contagious.

"We don't work with leeches; we _kill_ them."

They were starting to get too close, as they pointed and poked. I squeezed myself in between them, looked at Jake, and said, "Jake, she's my friend, and you know she's not like that. If Alice can help, I think you should let her. The pack's getting exhausted with around the clock patrols. Alice doesn't sleep, and she can predict Victoria's moves before she makes them."

"We don't need another patrol buddy, not one that stinks like _that_," Jacob sneered, pointing to Alice. "She can't see anything anyhow, so I'm not sure how her 'special talent' is going to help us." Jacob was stubbornly holding on to his hatred for the Cullens.

"Listen, dog–" Alice began.

"His name's Jacob," I interrupted

"Fine! Listen, _Jacob_, I can't see when the wolves are around, like when you pulled Bella out of the water, but I _can_ see when you _aren't_ there, like when Bella jumped _in_ the water. So, maybe I can't tell you if you're going to catch Victoria, if she's going to kill you, or if you're going to kill her, but I _can_ tell you what she's decided to do, where she'll be, and when she'll get there. Unless, of course, that information is completely useless to you."

Jacob wanted her help, but he wasn't about to ask for it, at least not nicely. "Fine, I'll talk to Sam and try to work something out, but only because Bella trusts you."

Jacob was about to leave, when Alice started to stare into space. She had the same strange look she got when she was having a vision. I grabbed Jake's arm before he left and gestured toward Alice. It was only a few seconds, but it was eerie all the same, as we waited for Alice to speak.

"She's decided to go to Seattle, to meet someone. She's got a new companion, male, looks like he was in his late teens when he was turned. I recognize him, sort of, but she's not doing anything with him or making plans. All I know is that he's her companion, but he's also going off on his own a lot. I don't understand their relationship." Alice looked confused.

I gave her a paper and pencil, and she drew frantically. I recognized the face, but I couldn't place it. Jake stared at it too. We were all looking intently at the drawing, when Charlie got home.

"Hey, kids. Alice. I thought you would have hit the road by now." He walked over to the table and glanced at Alice's picture. "Hey, did you draw this? Looks just like that kid, Riley. Did you know him?" Charlie asked.

"Dad, who is he?"

Charlie was confused. He looked from Alice—who was still spaced out—to me and replied, "He's some kid who's been missing for about a year. There are posters of him around Seattle, and I got one sent to me at the station recently. Why? Did you kids know him?"

Again, Charlie was staring at Alice, so I tried to deflect. "Oh, it's someone Alice used to know. We didn't recognize his name, but she thought we might remember if we saw his face." Then I said in a hushed tone to Charlie, "I think she's kind of upset to find out he's missing, Dad. Maybe we should give her some space?"

Charlie didn't need to be told twice that this had the potential to turn into an emotional teenage girl situation. He left the kitchen, went to the living room, and turned on the TV.

Alice looked up at Jacob and whispered, "Riley's planning something. He's creating new vampires. Just a few it looks like, maybe five or six, at least that's his plan for now."

Jacob was horrified. He and Alice stared at each other and then turned to me.

"You and your pack can't go into Seattle, but my family and I can," Alice said to Jacob. "I don't know what Riley's plans are, but he's associated with Victoria, and according to Charlie, he can't be more than a year old. That means he can't be the one in charge."

Jacob opened his mouth to speak, but Alice interrupted before he could begin.

"Jacob, we love Bella too, and _we_ can go into Seattle, no problem. You know you and your pack could never go there and phase. You'd have no way of remaining inconspicuous in the city." She was serious and no longer spoke as though they were enemies.

"I have to tell Sam, be right back," Jacob said, nodding in agreement.

Alice and I waited in silence for the few minutes it took for him to return.

"Okay, Sam says we can look out for Forks and Bella, while you take care of Seattle. However, if Victoria and her minions leave the city, let us know. We want to help." Jacob sounded more cooperative, the rancour gone from his voice.

Alice wasted no time. She immediately dialled and spoke into her phone with the quiet, speedy, vampire voice.

I was in shock and hadn't realized I had a horrified expression on my face. Jacob took one look at me and pulled me into his arms.

"It's okay, Bells. Don't worry. I'm going to take care of you. I'll do anything to keep you safe, even if it means asking all the Cullens to come back. Even if I have to beg Edward to come back, I'd do it, for you," Jacob whispered.

In the past, hearing Edward's name had always caused me pain, but when Jacob said it now—the _way_ he said it—it was only a name. There was no pain nor did anything dig into my chest. All I heard was Jake telling me how much he loved me. He loved me enough that he was willing to call the one person he hated most, that he feared could take me away from him, and whom he could never protect me from. I saw more than _my_ Jacob. I saw a boy who accepted a situation without struggle that only a man could accept.

As Jacob held me and filled my empty heart, giving me hope. I looked up at him as he looked down at me. His eyes were full of love and patience, all of it for me.

"I have to go, but I'll be back. Wait for me." He bent down and kissed the top of my head and left.

Once he was gone, I noticed Alice looking at me. I knew she had heard it all, and likely saw everything, too. It was innocent, but she knew, as I did, what it meant to me, what _Jacob_ meant to me. She didn't ask me about it. Instead, she smiled, put an arm on my shoulder, and said, "Emmett can't wait to come to Seattle for a real fight, same with Jasper. Rosalie, Carlisle, and Esme are coming too."

"What about…" I started to say, but didn't continue.

"We're going to wait to see what the situation is like in Seattle, first. I saw five or six, but that's in the near future. Right now, it's probably less, so it may not be necessary to…call in anyone else," she said, hesitating near the end. "I'm going back to our old house to prepare. Are you and Charlie going to be okay here?" Alice asked.

"Yeah, we're fine. You go. Jacob, or one of the pack, is always here watching me and Charlie."

"Bella, despite everything, I see Jacob loves you and will protect you."

"I know, Alice; I just don't know if there's enough of me left to give to him."

She looked at me, a little sadly it seemed, and then she quietly left.

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><p><strong>Chapter End Notes:<strong>

_What is going on in Seattle, and why is Alice able to see Victoria now, but not before? Will Alice see more? Will Victoria's plans change?_

_And will Jacob finally kiss Bella?_

_Find out in Chapter 2 - The Roles We Play_

_Ah... my very first chapter of my very first fanfiction story, which is also the very first piece of fiction I've written since the fifth grade. A review would be quite encouraging... Just saying..._


	2. The Roles We Play

_Thanks go to Emily and Edwardsfavouritebrunette, both from Project Team beta, who beta'ed this chapter!_

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><p><strong>Chapter 2 The Roles We Play<strong>

I was restless waiting to hear back from Jacob or Alice. I tried to avoid the swirling array of emotions in my head regarding Jacob and Edward, but with nothing else to do, it was inevitably where my thoughts ended up.

I wanted to understand what had changed. Why hadn't hearing Edward's name cause the aching pain in my chest to come back as it once had? Was Jacob's voice so powerful that no words could hurt me? Or was it because of _why_ Jacob had said his name. He had said it to confirm his love and devotion. I knew saying Edward's name, _hearing_ his name, was as painful for Jacob, as it was for me.

Why had I gotten angry when I found out it was Edward who had called? He hadn't even spoken to me. But, that was part of it. The fact that he did _what_ he wanted, _when_ he wanted, was a privilege he had denied me. He was able to "check up" on me, but I had no means of doing the same; I couldn't even leave a message! It was inequitable. This was what had made me resentful. I realized the imbalance in my relationship with Edward had always existed.

Our relationship was a tipped scale that allowed him to leave without fanfare, at least not for him. There had been no discussion, no lead up, not even an argument. He had made his decision, and I had been left to pick up the pieces. I hadn't gotten the opportunity to beg, plead, or scream. I wasn't even able to seek revenge, if I were so inclined. As always, he alone determined the course of our relationship. It began when _he_ decided _he_ couldn't stay away from me. We progressed at _his_ pace, following _his_ rules, and it ended when _he_ decided to leave. The more I thought about it, the more frustrated I got. He had made me powerless. In the end, the anger subsided when I realized it was only masking my real emotion—sadness. I was sad because I hadn't had the power to keep Edward in my life.

Then I thought about Jacob and why I hesitated to move forward, keeping him in the friend zone. I knew I loved him, but I wasn't sure if it was the same love I had had with Edward. Actually, I knew it wasn't. While I'd been drawn to Jacob the moment I laid eyes on him, I hadn't instantly fallen in love. There was no defined moment where my world stopped, or my being was hit with an electric jolt. Did that mean it wasn't true love? Couldn't friendship grow into love as strong as that which strikes the heart in one blinding moment?

Right now, I didn't just _want_ Jacob; I felt a _need_ to be for him. When we were together, no matter what we were doing, I longed to hear his voice, to touch him, hold him and feel the warmth of his presence. Yet, I tried to resist his touch, so I wouldn't hurt him, but when he hugged me, or held my hand, it brought light to the dark hole in my chest. I thought again about the last time we almost kissed, and wondered why I pulled away. Had I _wanted_ him to kiss me? If I were honest, yes, I had wanted him to kiss me. So why had I stopped him? I had wanted him, and he had been willing to take a chance, knowing I loved someone else, that I was broken.

Was I afraid it would leave him hurt, or that I'd be the one left hurting?

My mind started to wander back to Romeo and Juliet. That story had never been mine. Edward was no Romeo. Romeo didn't avoid Juliet when he found out she was a Capulet. He didn't abandon Juliet, even after he killed Tibalt. And Jacob was not Paris. He could never be a minor character. He was immense, not just physically, but in personality, warmth, and determination. There was nothing half way or quiet about him. Jacob was all passion, persistence, and action.

And Juliet, that wasn't me, or at least I didn't _want_ it to be. I wasn't perfect, and I didn't willingly end my life because I couldn't have Romeo. Sure, I lived a zombie existence, but I stayed alive all the same. I didn't want to be a person who was so overcome by the influence of another, that losing him meant I would completely forget everyone else who loved and needed me. I didn't want to be so consumed that I could end my own life, leaving Charlie, Renee, and Jacob as broken as I was.

That left me hanging. Where did I go from here? Edward didn't want me but Jacob did, intensely. Would it be wrong to give Jacob what he wanted? He knew I was damaged, but that wasn't enough to deter him. Jacob believed I could be fixed, that time and kindness would heal my wounds. I knew if I gave in and crossed that line between friendship and something more, it would bring Jacob happiness. It would make me happier too, but I was pretty sure I wouldn't feel consumed and desperate like I had with Edward. If the comfortable affection I had with Jacob was all I _could_ have, now that Edward was gone, would it make me a bad person to accept it? More importantly, what kind of person would it make me to take Jacob's pure and optimistic love, if I believed I could never give back as much?

Just then, my thoughts were interrupted by the ringing telephone. I answered; it was Alice.

"Bella, I just talked to Carlisle. He's very sorry we left you in danger and feels indebted to Jacob and the wolves for keeping you safe. He's coming with Esme, Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper. We're going to comb the newspapers and missing persons reports to see what sort of activity's been going on in the area. If you happen to hear Charlie talking about anything, please let me know."

I remembered the attacks and told Alice, "There have been a few hikers and campers who've disappeared recently. People think animals are responsible, but the pack says Laurent and Victoria caused the disappearances. Laurent's been dead for about two weeks, but the attacks haven't slowed down. I don't know how much Victoria has to feed, but it seems like a lot of people for one vampire."

"Thanks, Bella. I'm checking for any decisions being made by Victoria or Riley. I also have to go hunting and get some supplies, then we're all off to Seattle, but you and I will get together once it's all over. Please tell Jacob thank you again, and remind him we're happy to lift the treaty lines to ensure your safety and the safety of the town. Talk to you soon."

"Wait, Alice, I want to ask you something."

"Go ahead, Bella"

"How come you didn't see Victoria with Riley or see her planning anything before you came back to Forks?"

"I still don't see everything she's planning, Bella. Right now, I see what she's going to do and with whom she's spending her time with because I'm looking _just_ for her. Before, I was waiting for a decision she might make regarding our family, not every little mundane thing she was thinking of doing. There are a lot of things going on in the future; I have to focus on what's important to me and filter out the rest. Victoria wasn't after our family, so her future wasn't automatically highlighted. You were often invisible to me because of the time you spent with Jacob. I guess you could say, now that I know she's back and after you instead of us, I've got an 'all points bulletin' out for all aspects of her future in my visions," Alice explained.

"I'm glad you came back, Alice. I know Jacob didn't say this, but he's pretty happy about what you've done to help already. The whole pack's been working around the clock chasing Victoria, and any information about her is helpful, especially if she's got allies they don't know about," I said, apologizing for Jacob, while at the same time hoping she'd see how hard he'd been working to protect me.

"Bella, don't worry about me and Jacob. I don't take anything he says to heart. It's not like I was on my best behavior, either. I know it's difficult for him, because it's most _certainly_ difficult for me, and I've had nearly a hundred years to become patient and tolerant! I'm just sorry you're stuck in the middle. I'll try harder. The last thing I should be doing is causing you any further grief." Alice sounded regretful, and not just for her exchange with Jacob earlier. She seemed sad that I had someone in my life who couldn't be shared with her. Even Charlie was warm towards her, but she knew Jacob would always be her enemy.

"Alice, I don't want you to think you and I can't be close because Jacob's in my life. Just because you two don't…get along…doesn't mean the two of _us_ can't have something outside my time with him. I don't want to lose you again, Alice." Was there no way to be her friend and keep Jacob with me as well?

"Bella, don't worry; everything's fine. Jacob and I will be fine. He's young, and he's a werewolf with some temperament issues. It's nothing I can't handle. I'm not asking you to take sides, and I never will. Now get some rest."

"Thanks, Alice, and please tell me what you find out."

"I will, Bella. I won't leave you in the dark. Take care of yourself and Charlie."

We hung up as the doorbell rang. I looked out my window, saw Jake, immediately went downstairs, and opened the door.

"Jacob, you're back," I said, as I indicated for him to come in. Jacob subtly jerked his head, signalling he'd like me to come outside, probably for some privacy. I was hesitant because it was dark and cold, but I did it anyway. I yelled toward the living room at Charlie, to let him know I was out front with Jacob and then closed the door behind me.

"I…Bella, I came by to tell you…umm… I wanted to make sure you knew…" Jacob hesitated. He looked down and avoided my gaze. I waited, gave him time to gather his thoughts, and said nothing. Slowly, he looked to me but was still silent. Jacob was seldom at a loss for words, and this silence felt like a heavy fog between us. I wanted to dissipate it, so I said the only thing I could think of.

"Alice called a few minutes ago. She talked to Carlisle, who thanks you for looking out for me, and he wants to ensure you and the pack that he's happy to lift the treaty lines so you can protect us," I blurted out quickly. I was anxious to fill the uncomfortable silence, and I wanted to let him know how cooperative my vampire friends were being.

"Sure, sure, it'll make things easier for us. Did she mention what the Cullens are planning to do? Are they coming back?" Jacob was all business now but seemed tense when he asked the last question.

"They're all coming back, except Edward. They're going straight to Seattle, to check out the situation, and she said she'd keep us posted." I looked at Jacob as I answered. He tried so hard to remain expressionless, but I detected relief upon hearing Edward would not return.

Jacob didn't say anything else, and I had nothing else to add. I didn't want him to go, and I was pretty sure he didn't want to leave. In fact, he hadn't even told me why he came back.

Finally, Jacob took my hands in his and spoke. "I wish it were me out there getting those leeches, instead of the Cullens. It's _my_ job to protect you," Jacob said with resignation in his voice.

"Jake, the most important job you have, as far as I'm concerned, is to make me happy. And you make me happy every time I see you smile, so smile already!" I gave him a playful tug with my hands, making his face light up. Jacob released my hands and gave me a hug. He hugged me longer than usual, not letting go. We stood in each other's arms, silent for what seemed like an eternity. It felt good and kept me warm in the cold, night air.

I pulled my face away from his chest to look up at him. Jacob's eyes gazed down on mine longingly. I felt his heart race where my head rested and a slight, nervous quiver ran through his body. He wanted more, but I knew he was restraining himself from giving too much. I had rejected his advances one too many times.

I felt my own heart speed and heat rose to my face. I wanted to kiss him. I knew if I did, he'd be mine, but I was scared. I didn't want to lose my friend. He was my link to the living. What if the kiss changed everything? It was true, I _wanted_ this, and Jacob wanted it too. It was also true that I saw the imbalance of the situation. I could never fully reciprocate the love he was willing to give me. But it wasn't _my_ right decide what was, or was not, best for Jacob. I could only be honest with him, which I had always tried to be.

Jacob held his breath, and I saw him slowly move his face away, his shoulders slumped in disappointment. The pained look on his face brought a sharp pang to my chest. I had to try. If I did, he would be sunny and happy again. I knew Jacob would never stop trying. He would rather have a chance with me and fail, than be told it wasn't good for him. It would be worth the risk to him, in which case, who was I to deny him something that I too wanted?

I went up on my toes, took his face in my hands, and pulled him gently towards me. I stood two steps above him on our front stoop, but Jacob still had to bend over to meet me. When I looked into his eyes, they were smoldering. I paused, only for a second, before I touched my lips to his.

As soon as our lips connected, all the emptiness in my chest filled with light. His arms embraced me tighter as his lips searched out mine. His mouth felt soft, full and moist. Our lips melded and changed shape to fit together. My lips weren't moulded into the form of someone else's. Instead, _our_ lips formed into the shape of _us_. Jacob's kiss caressed me. It was gentle at first, almost hesitant. Slowly, it intensified, and my mind drifted into a dream-like state.

Behind my closed eyes, I saw a bright, almost blinding haze. Enveloped within, Renee and Charlie laughed and walked. They each had one hand of a little dark haired girl in their grasps, as she walked between them. Slightly ahead was a smiling little boy, running. Then I saw _us_. Jacob and I were smiling, closing the distance, and meeting up with my parents and the children. I had my arm in Jacob's as he pushed a stroller with a sleeping baby in it.

Slowly, the pressure of Jacob's lips on mine became lighter. The bright haze in my vision dimmed as the people enveloped in it began to fade. Jacob's lips were no longer touching mine, but they were so close that I felt the heat and moisture of his breath.

"Bella, I love you," Jacob whispered. "I'm _in_ love with you, and I needed to let you know. You don't have to tell me where _you_ are because nothing has to change, if you're not ready. You can still tell me anything, good or bad, and if you need a friend, I'll always be there. I'll wait as long as I need to, until you're ready."

I couldn't speak. My mind exploded with emotion and needed time to decipher what had happened.

In that moment, I knew Jacob's happiness lay on my shoulders. I was afraid if I said the wrong thing, I would crush him. I always believed I had always been truthful with Jacob, but right now, I didn't know what the truth was. I had thought I could never love anyone else again, but when we kissed, I felt I _could_ love Jacob. Perhaps, I _already_ loved Jacob. Maybe I hadn't seen it before because it had happened so slowly, gradually over time. It had seemed like a comfortable, warm friendship, but it had grown into more, and I had failed to notice. When had it started to become…love? At what point did I start to feel my best friend was more than _just_ a friend?

"Jake, you mean so much to me, but I don't know anything else right now. There's so much going on in my head. I don't regret anything that happened. I'm afraid, though, because I don't want to hurt you. You know what I'm like right now, who I am inside. I'm not completely together, and I don't know if I ever will be. I know you tell me you don't care but _I_ care. I don't want to leave you as broken as I was."

Jacob looked at me intently. Could he see right through me? Was my mind an open book to him?

"Bella, I'd rather have you like this… Hell, I'd rather have you be mine, always _knowing_ I was second choice, than lose you. Don't you see? Losing you is worse than being hurt by you because I love you."

I didn't want him to do that, or did I? It scared me to hear him speak like that. We both knew what he felt wasn't just friendly, but to hear him say those words, to expose himself to this level of vulnerability, scared me. I didn't know what to say because I wasn't sure of my own feelings. I also didn't want to see him defeated, so I had to do something. I decided it was better to show him I cared by making plans to spend time with him, than to offer less than what he wanted in words.

"Jacob, I'm happiest when I'm with you. I want to be with you as much as I can, so come over tomorrow. We can do some homework together, and you can stay for dinner with Charlie and me." I leaned over and gave him a gentle kiss on the lips.

"I'll be here tomorrow, and I'll even bring homework," Jacob replied, smiling.

"Okay, now go home. I'm sure Charlie's at the window peeking through the curtains." I squeezed Jacob's hand before letting go and heading into the house.

Once inside, I headed toward the stairs, when I was topped by Charlie's calling me. He was on the phone, indicating it was for me. I took it from him as he left the room.

"Hello?"

"Bella, it's Alice again. I wanted to give you an update. We've all been doing some research, and you're right, there have been too many disappearances for it to be just Victoria feeding herself. I've also had another vision. I saw us eliminating the new vampires that were created, but it won't stop Victoria. The worst part is that the Volturi end up coming here to intervene. I don't like it. They might find out about you and the wolves, and that won't be good for anyone. You know too much about us.

"I'm trying to find a way to change this course, and I wanted to talk to you first. It seems imperative that we destroy Victoria, as soon as possible. We don't want her to get the Volturi involved. I think we have to ask Edward to come here. It's the only decision left that I can think of to change this current course. Are you going to be okay with that?" Alice sounded concerned, but I already knew what my reply would be.

"Alice, please, anything that'll protect Charlie, Jacob, and everyone else," I answered, hoping it would reassure Alice I wouldn't fall apart if Edward came.

"Okay, Bella. I left my number on your night table if you need to reach me. Take care of yourself."

"Goodbye, Alice, and thank you."

So, Edward was coming back to Forks. I wasn't looking forward to Jacob's reaction, but the bigger problem was how I would feel once I saw Edward again.

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><p><em>Thanks for giving this story a try, and reviews are always appreciated<em>


	3. In the Shadow

_Thank you to Pastichelethe and My-Heart-of-Music, both from Project Team Beta for beta'ing this chapter!_

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><p><strong>Chapter 3 - In the Shadow<strong>

I tried to sleep later that night, but my thoughts kept drifting back to the kiss with Jacob. The vision I had didn't seem like an illusion. It felt prophetic. I felt it was what life with Jacob could be. I could have it all—the large sprawling family, my parents, children, and give up nothing. Well, almost nothing. I'd have to give up Edward. Why was that difficult? All I had of him were damaging memories; yet, I clung to them as if they breathed life into me. Why was he so difficult to let go of? Why wasn't Jacob's vitality easier to run to? Was it because I was concerned for him, or was I clinging to a fantasy, afraid to face reality?

I drifted to sleep in the midst of my thoughts, but it wasn't a peaceful slumber. The angst I felt inside turned into a nightmare. I sat still as the space around me spun rapidly with changing scenes and characters. There were glimpses of Jacob on his knees, in pain, and with tears streaming from his eyes. Edward called out for me, but I couldn't reach him. Renee and Charlie shouted my name and looked in every direction except where I was. Eventually, I woke up, screaming.

Charlie had stopped coming into my room when I had nightmares. It was the rare, extra loud, screaming fits that lured him from his bed these days. I sat up, alone in the dark, with cold sweat dampening my hair, when suddenly, I was swept up in a firm embrace.

Jacob's asked, "Bella, are you okay? Are you hurt?"

My eyes opened, and still in a dreamy haze, I told him, "It's okay, Jake—just a nightmare. Happens so often Charlie doesn't even come in to check anymore." A cool breeze sent a chill over my exposed body. I looked in the direction it came from and noticed the window was open.

"I thought you were being attacked," said Jacob, looking a little embarrassed.

"I'm fine. Why are you here? Don't you sleep?"

"I was asleep outside your window, in the shadow of the trees. I couldn't stay away from you tonight." He smiled a sheepish grin.

I looked away from his face, down toward the ground. Jacob was naked! I turned away knowing heat had reddened my face. In the confusion, I fell off my bed, and out of the corner of my eye, I saw my top sheet sliding away.

"Bella, I'm sorry, but please don't wake Charlie," Jacob whispered. "It's going to look _really_ bad if he walks in right now."

"Jake, what are you doing? Put something on!" I whispered back harshly. I kept my gaze on the floor.

"Your scream scared me. I phased human and jumped up here as fast as I could. I didn't wait to put clothes on. Okay, the coast is clear. I've covered myself up. You can turn around."

I turned slowly. Jacob sat on my bed with the sheet wrapped around him, like a sarong. He patted the spot next to him, signalling for me to sit. The only other person who had shared this bed with me was Edward. The reminder started the process that would reopen the wound in my chest. My arms involuntarily wrapped around my body in its futile attempt to stop what I never could. Jacob noticed, and his smile faded.

"Is he going cast a shadow on every moment we have together?" Jacob's voice was filled with rancor. "Why can't you see me, without seeing _him_? I'm not anything _like_ him. Were you thinking of _him_ when you kissed _me_? Is that why you kissed me, to remind yourself of him?"

Tears welled up in my eyes. I didn't know what to say because what Jacob had said wasn't far from the truth. During every moment I had with him, there was still a part of me that drifted to Edward. I had compared Jacob's kiss with those I shared with Edward. The contrast between cold and hot, soft and hard, and obsessive desire with comforting friendship, these were the thoughts foremost in my mind then, and after. Was I that easy to read? How was it Jacob saw through all my efforts to hide my true thoughts?

He moved to get off the bed, but I stopped him and eased in next to him. I snuggled up to Jacob, resting my head on his chest. His body began to relax and his arm moved up and around my shoulders, holding me closely.

"I've never had anyone keep me warm and comfortable in this bed, until now," I whispered. My hand moved to Jacob's chest, caressing the muscles, as it traveled in small circles. "I never felt flesh beneath my body. With him, there was always a blanket between us to keep me from getting cold." I stopped before saying the one thing that made the biggest difference to me. I was afraid it would erase the beauty of what I had with Edward and soil the purity of Jacob's love for me. But, as always, Jacob knew I was holding back.

"Is that all that's different, Bells? Just temperature and texture?" Jacob asked quietly, stroking my hair.

"No. I could never do this," I answered as I stroked his chest, allowing my hand to drift down his abdomen. Jacob took hold of my wrist before I could get past his navel.

"Bella, I can't. I know I told you I'd take any scraps you'd toss my way, but it hurts too much knowing you're thinking of him. You don't have to want it as much as I do, but I need you to want _me_, if this is where we're going." Jacob wouldn't look at me, and I his hand loosened its grip around my shoulders. We sat in silence for what seemed like hours, but I knew it was barely a minute. "Look, I only came to make sure you were okay. I'm going home to get some sleep. See you later." Jacob stood up.

"Wait!" I called after him "Don't leave me, please." I didn't want to plead, but I didn't know what else to do.

"It's okay, Bells. Everything's still the same. I think you need to be alone to think. I'm not upset with you, okay?"

"But…can't you stay? Just for a little while? What if Victoria comes here looking for me?" Okay, I was hitting below the belt. It was selfish, but if Jacob left right now I had a feeling things _wouldn't_ be the same.

Jacob stopped, his back to me. I hated the silence, especially when I couldn't see his face. Was he silent because he hated me? I was sure he knew I was manipulating him to get what I wanted. I was a horrible person.

Jacob took a deep breath and looked down at my night table. He picked up the two books on it. They were Romeo and Juliet and my tattered copy of Wuthering Heights.

"You think life is like this, don't you? You want it all, without risking or giving up anything. Sometimes, Bella, I wish I loved someone else." Jacob turned around to face me. His eyes were glossy with unspent tears, and mine were spilling over. "Cullen isn't Romeo and _you_ are no Juliet. You were a good person, Bella, and you turned sad, and that was okay. But now, there are times I feel completely forgotten by you. I know you're hurting, but I am, too. You're not the only person who loves someone that won't love you back. At least Cullen cut you loose." He grabbed my copy of Wuthering Heights and threw it on the bed in my direction. "You, Bella, are turning me into Heathcliff!"

I sprang out of bed and grabbed Jacob with both hands, as desperate as if I were gasping for my last breath.

"Jacob, please. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Please, don't go." I fell to my knees, hanging onto his hands with both of mine. I wept into them and felt my tears run through my fingers, and onto his. Jacob freed his hands from mine, stroked my hair, and wiped the tears from my eyes.

"Bella, don't cry. I'm sorry I said those things." He bent down, slid his hands under my arms, lifted me up onto my feet, and held me tight. Like the selfish fool that I was, I cried streams of tears into his chest. I had no right to take the comfort he offered when _I_ was the one who had hurt _him_, but I still took it.

"You're right, Jacob. I _am_ selfish, like Cathy. But, you're not Heathcliff! I don't know anyone that makes me as happy as you, and you do it just by your presence. You could _never_ be bitter and destructive."

"You don't know what I'm capable of." Jacob looked dark. He was hard, not like a sixteen year old boy. I needed this to end. It was tearing apart what little of me was together in the first place.

"So…you've read Wuthering Heights? You never struck me as a Bronte fan," I said, trying to lighten the mood.

"I've got two sisters, and limited entertainment options, in a small town where it rains constantly," Jacob replied with a shrug of his shoulders. "See how sad life has been for me? Now, if I had a girlfriend…" One of Jacob's eyebrows lifted as his lips curled up in a playful smile.

I was so happy to see him smile that I didn't even care about the innuendo.

"It sounds like you'd be better off bored. Imagine the depth of understanding you would gain if you devoted your time to literary study like that," I replied.

"What, like you? You can't lie, you're constantly misunderstanding people, and you're clueless about how others see you. I'm thinking it's not reading material that makes me so insightful." Jacob smirked smugly.

"Who said you were insightful?"

"Hey, baby, you don't have to say it. I know it. Really, Bells, who always reads you like a book? To be fair, you're about the easiest person in the world to read, but still…" I knew that mood between us had gotten better because I was getting pretty irritated.

"I thought you were leaving," I grumbled.

"I thought you needed protecting. Here, I'll check under your bed for the boogie man."

"After everything I've been through, I would laugh in the face of the boogie man. Speaking of boogie men, how often have you been lurking around my house at night?" I asked.

"Hey, it's just today, I swear. And I wasn't lurking! Lurking sounds like something a dirty old man does, not a high school kid."

"You know, Jake, you hardly look like a high school student. None of you guys do. I bet if you said you were twenty-five, no one would blink. Does being a werewolf age you?" Again, I had said the wrong thing. Bitterness spread across Jacob's face.

"Phasing makes us mature at an accelerated rate, until we reach our adult size. But it doesn't age us beyond that. Right now, I'm not aging at all. At least not while I'm phasing regularly," Jacob said with a sigh.

What was going on? Was I the only one left getting closer to death every day?

"I'm the only one getting old around here," I muttered under my breath, not realizing Jacob could hear me.

"We're not the same as _them_, Bella. We're still alive, and we can go back to normal. After a while, when we've gained enough control, we can choose to stop phasing altogether. Once we do that, we'll eventually start aging again. We aren't frozen, and _we_ can change." I could tell Jacob was getting agitated because his body stiffened.

"Jake, I wasn't making comparisons. I didn't realize I said it aloud. It's just something I used to think a lot about…you know, before…" Why were we constantly at odds with each other tonight? Was that kiss a mistake? Was that the reason things were different now? "Jacob, please."

"It's okay, Bells." Jacob squeezed my shoulders and smiled. "If it'll make you feel better, I'm pretty sure I could pass for twenty-seven, with the right clothes, and I bet if you said you were twelve no one would blink."

"I do _not_ look twelve!" I protested and slapped Jacob's arm playfully.

"If you say so…"

"You know, there are old ladies smaller than me. Age is not about size." I tried to sound indignant, but I was pretty sure it wasn't convincing.

"Chicks, I'll never understand them. I'm trying to make you feel better by saying you look young, and you're ready to trade in your sneakers for a walker." Jacob squeezed my shoulders. I tried to respond by hitting him with my pillow, but he caught it and tossed it to the foot of my bed.

"Hey, that's my pillow!"

"Oh well, guess you'll have to improvise." He leaned back onto my headboard with his arms stretched out on either side.

I moved in front of him, grabbed the pillow behind me and started hitting him in the face with it. Jacob grabbed my arms, lowering them so I couldn't reach his face.

"Hey, you better be careful. I fight dirty," he said. He grabbed me around the waist and flipped me down onto my bed. I started laughing, but Jacob put his hand over my mouth. "Shh…Charlie…" He slowly removed his hand and looked at me.

We had ended up with me lying on my back, Jacob on top of me, holding himself up just slightly above. I didn't move. I didn't breathe. Jacob didn't blink.

I slowly wrapped my arms around him until my hands were clasped behind his neck. He lowered himself towards me. We stared into each other's eyes, our lips almost touching. I felt his breath on my mouth. I thought Jacob would kiss me, but he didn't. He only looked at me, motionless. I slid my hand down his sides, along his ribcage. Then, I slid them forward, across the square muscles of his abdomen. My two hands met at his navel where they made their way to the sheet tied around him. I slid a finger along the skin where the sheet hugged his body. I turned my head and kissed his fingers, moving my lips up to hand, then to his forearm. All the time, my hands were making small circles just below his navel.

Finally, I couldn't wait for him to kiss me. I lifted my face up, closing the small distance between us, and sought out his lips in frenzied desperation. I pulled his body down to mine, pressing against him until no space remained between us. The kiss set me free. I was flying, like a bird swooping across blue skies. I felt a warm breeze and smelled the salt air. Then, I was afraid. I saw how high I was. The ocean below was dark and churned violently. There was no one to catch me. Why wasn't anyone there to catch me? Why hadn't someone stopped me from getting so far from land?

I froze, which made Jacob freeze. Our lips parted and we stared at each other, again.

"You didn't stop me," I said.

"Did you want me to stop?" Jacob asked.

"No…yes…I mean, I don't know. I thought if things got too far, you'd stop me."

"Bella, I'd never push you. I'm going to follow your lead and go at your pace. Isn't that what we were doing?" Jacob asked gently.

"I guess… I just didn't…did you think this was too much?"

"Bells, I'm a pretty good guy, but I'm _still_ a _guy_. A sixteen year old guy, I might add. I can go at whatever pace you want, but I'm not sure I can be the referee. Not to be sexist, but isn't that usually the girl's job?" Jacob smiled comfortingly. "It's okay, if it's too much. We can stop. I'd be just as happy—well almost just as happy—to hold you next to me. Just tell me what you want."

That was the problem. I didn't know what I wanted. I'd never had to make this decision before. Edward had always been the one to stop. Now, Jacob wanted _me_ to decide. Why was I getting anxious about this, of all things? Hadn't I resented having this decision taken away from me before? It wasn't that long ago when I had felt ready to give up human existence, and now, I couldn't decide if I wanted to go to second base with my… What _was_ Jacob?

"Why don't we talk?" I asked.

We moved back to our original spots, leaning on the headboard and snuggling closely. I felt secure and comfortable. It was enough that I could have slept soundly sitting with Jacob's arm around me, but I remembered Alice's phone call from earlier. I sighed, knowing I had to break this moment to tell him.

"Jake, Alice called after you left."

"Any message?" he asked. I felt his body stiffen again, but he didn't move away.

"They've found evidence that Victoria or Riley, maybe both, have created new vampires. Alice also had a vision the Cullens would be able to slow down some of the activity, but Victoria would get the Volturi involved. They're sort of a mix between the vampire world's royal family and their police."

"So what does that mean for us?"

"It'll be bad if the Volturi find out about the wolves, and it'll be especially dangerous for me. The Volturi's main concern is ensuring the existence of vampires remain secret, and I know too much. Alice feels it's imperative to destroy Victoria before she informs them. She thinks we need to call Edward, because it's one of the only decisions left that hasn't been made yet. It may alter the future enough." I watched Jacob's face for a reaction. His expression was like stone. He tightened his hold on me and looked at a random spot on the wall opposite us.

"You told Alice it was okay to ask Edward to come back." It was a statement, not a question. Jacob paused, his expression frozen, but I saw the hurt in his eyes. "I told you I'd ask him to come myself, if it kept you safe. I meant it, but I want to know…" His gaze lowered and he swallowed hard. "Bella, I'm never going to stop trying. We're destined to be together, but I know you still love him. If he returns, and he wants you back, are you going to leave me? Are you going to give up on us and deny me a chance?"

I didn't answer right away, making Jacob add, "Bells, it's okay. You can tell me the truth, whatever it is, but you _have_ to tell me. I need to know what I'm up against. Don't send me into a fight blind."

"I don't know what I'd do, but he doesn't want me, so it doesn't matter," I answered, unable to look him in the eye. Jacob was silent. It wasn't what he wanted to hear. Why couldn't I lie? I took a moment to gather my thoughts. Finally, I looked into his warm brown eyes and continued, "But I know you mean everything to me right now. You make me happy, you hold me together, and I want you."

"It's okay if you're not sure, Bells," Jacob replied. "I already knew that. Not sure isn't the worst answer I imagined." I felt Jacob's body relax, and he kissed the top of my head.

We sat for a few minutes in silence as he absently played with my hair. Then, he sighed and started to take his arm off me.

"It's getting late, I should go." He smiled sheepishly before saying, "My shorts are calling me, and I'm pretty sure Charlie will be in here, guns a blazin', if he knew I was naked in your bed. Turn around and close your eyes while I make my getaway. I wouldn't want to tarnish your innocence."

"Remember, I'm older than you. What makes you think I'm interested in looking anyway?" I replied, slapping his arm playfully. I was so happy I had the sunny boy back that I didn't care about being embarrassed.

Jacob raised an eyebrow. "You think I haven't noticed you _gawking_ at me?"

I wanted to say something, but I knew the color was rising to my cheeks faster than it ever had before. I threw a pillow at Jacob and flopped onto my bed, face down. I felt him get up and tuck the blanket around me. After a minute, I heard the window open. I couldn't help it. I just took one little peek as he left. In the darkness, with the moonlight casting dim shadows, I saw his silhouette as he climbed out. Even in the darkness, Jacob was absolutely beautiful.

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><p><em>Thanks for giving this story a try, and I hope you've been enjoying it. Reviews are appreciated.<em>


	4. Encounter

__Thank you to ChocolateMango and Kay-Gemini, both from Project Team Beta, for beta'ing this chapter!__

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><p><strong>Chapter 4 - Encounter<strong>

Jacob arrived with his dad and Charlie on Sunday afternoon. Billy and Charlie had been at the Clearwaters' place helping Sue, and they both looked drained. The long, somber faces on everyone didn't seem promising when they arrived, but by the time dinner was in the oven, the mood had lifted. Charlie and Billy were in the living room watching TV and chatting pleasantly. Jacob and I were at the kitchen table doing our homework as dinner cooked in the oven. We talked, laughed, and worked. It was nice. Our conversation remained light, and things between us felt the same as they had a month ago.

Once the food was ready, we all sat around the table and ate. I couldn't remember ever having such a good time eating a meal. Everyone went on and on about how great the food was, and there was so much laughter and conversation. We were all at ease, and Jacob's presence filled our house with warmth. It really felt like we were one family.

After dessert, Charlie and Billy went back to the TV, and Jacob helped me clean up. The sink area felt very crowded. Jacob was just not like any other sixteen year old. I did my best to give him as much space as possible, putting the dishes away as he dried them.

We headed out to the backyard once everything was cleaned up, and Jacob took my hand in his. We lay on the grass looking at the stars, talking about nothing in particular. It was a rare clear night. After a short pause, I asked him if there was any new pack gossip, thinking I was keeping the conversation light. Jacob was suddenly quiet and somber.

"Oh, Bella, things are just a mess," he began. "I don't know when this is going to stop. Seth and Leah Clearwater have joined the pack." I gasped as Jacob took a deep breath before continuing. "We were all shocked too. None of us have heard any stories about girls turning into wolves; it's always been the guys. To top it all off, Leah's a piece of work. I guess it's not really her fault. I suppose if things were different, I'd probably be just as bitter and unpleasant. But, we have to live it all the time. I hate sharing thoughts. And poor Seth is just a kid."

I didn't know what to say. Their father had just passed away and now they were being hit with... this. "Oh, Jake, how are they coping? With Harry gone too..."

"Bella, Harry had his heart attack when he found out about his children... changing," Jacob answered.

I gasped in disbelief, unable to fathom the guilt Seth and Leah must be living with.

We lay for a while, holding hands, looking up at the clear, night sky. Jacob squeezed my hand, rolled over onto his side, and swept a little of my hair behind my ear.

"I wish it was just us, and that none of these myths had come to life," Jacob said.

"We still have us. Everything isn't bad, is it?" I asked.

"No, it's not, especially being with you, Bells."

"What would you be doing if you weren't a wolf running patrols and chasing Victoria?" I asked Jacob.

"Doing better in school, thinking of what I wanted to do with my life, and figuring out how to go to college earlier," Jacob answered.

"We've been doing homework together as often as I can manage. You aren't failing, are you? Tell me I didn't cause that to happen, too." I was beginning to feel guilty for having lured him away from his responsibilities for the last couple of months.

"None of this is your fault, Bella. And I'm not failing. I'm just not doing as well as I was before I phased. I just took on more than I can handle this semester. I really wanted to graduate early." I was pretty sure _why_ he wanted to graduate early but was at a loss for words. He had to have taken on extra courses some time ago, which meant he was thinking about our future while I was still a member of the walking dead, visiting his garage.

"It _is_ my fault, and you know it. All these patrols, hunting Victoria, none of it would be necessary if I wasn't around," I replied.

"If you weren't 'around', I wouldn't care about any of it."

"At least let me help you with school. It's the only thing I can help you with, and you've done so much for me. What are you behind in?"

"Everything. Can we talk about you instead?"

"What do you want to know?"

"What are you doing next year?"

"You mean if I'm still alive?"

"Bells, be serious."

"I _am_ being serious. Fine. I don't know for sure. I've sent in some applications, but I haven't decided yet. My year isn't exactly stellar either. Being a zombie apparently isn't so great for your GPA," I said.

"Where did you send applications to?" Jacob tried to sound unconcerned, but he was anything but.

"UW, Washington State, a couple of other places," I answered, feeling about as casual as Jacob probably was.

"What other places?"

"It doesn't matter, I'm staying close to home. What about you? What are you planning to do? If you're planning to graduate early you must have already thought a little about college." I was doing my best to deflect.

"It doesn't matter what I was planning to do because that's not my plan anymore. I have other commitments. So, you didn't answer me, what other places?"

"In Florida, because Renee is a resident, so I could afford to go there too, but I don't think I'm going to. Now you have to answer _my_ questions. What were you planning and don't give me this crap about other commitments. You'll figure out a way, Jacob. Don't let Sam ruin your future. It shouldn't be up to him." Again, it was Sam. I didn't care if it was his fault or not; he was preventing Jacob from living his life.

"Not that it makes any difference now, but I wanted to get into the engineering program at UW. I was planning on finishing high school a year early because I didn't think you'd want to be with a junior while you were in college. I thought if I could start a year after you it might make things more... possible."

"Oh." What could I say? "Well I think you should still continue to do what you were planning. Things will change. I know it. There's only a few more months left of this school year, and I can help you. Since when do you give up so easily, Jacob?"

"Since things began to happen to me that were completely out of my control."

"You won't be chasing Victoria forever and all of you guys can't just stop living your lives. It's not fair. Besides, I don't believe anything is _completely_ out of your control. Jacob, I've never met anyone more persistent that you. You try harder than I ever thought possible. If anyone can make this happen, you can."

"What have I ever done that was impossible, Bells? Fixed up a couple of bikes? Come on..."

"You got me to kiss you, and like it. You got me to see our friendship as something more. Do you know how utterly impossible I thought that would be?"

"You really liked it?" Okay, now I was grateful it was dark because I knew I was all red.

"Yes. Was there something about yesterday that made you think I didn't?"

"I guess not, but... when I think about you, it makes me feel..." Jacob didn't continue right away. Then, in a whisper, he said, "insecure." Jacob, insecure? It was as unbelievable as the earth being flat. It was overwhelming that I mattered enough to him to cause this level of anxiety; yet, at the same time, it was scary to know my actions could have such an influence on his happiness. I didn't want the responsibility.

The still night started to be swept up by a cool breeze. I rolled closer to Jacob's warm body as the wind rustled the leaves in the surrounding forest, bringing with it the scent of wet foliage. The minute my hand came to rest on Jacob's chest, he sprang up, and I heard a growl resonate from deep within him. He jerked, and turned towards the trees, just as a dark figure emerged from the forest.

I stood and looked. At first, I could only see a silhouette. It appeared to be a tall, slim man dressed in dark clothing. I could see the pale skin on his face shine in the moonlight. I grabbed hold of Jacob's arm, afraid of this stranger and could feel the shaking reverberating through his body. Then everything came into light.

"Bella, I want to speak to you. If you don't mind, Jacob, I wish to have a moment alone with her." It was Edward's voice that came from the shadows.

"As a matter of fact, I _do_ mind. You weren't invited here, but _I_ was, so I'm not going anywhere." Jacob stood firm in his spot with an arm draped over my shoulders, holding me closely.

"Bella, perhaps we can just step here into the trail? For a little privacy?" Edward walked towards me, holding his hand out for me take. I looked into the forest where the two of us had our last conversation and fear took hold of me. I couldn't move, speak or breathe.

"Really? You're asking her to go in _there_?" Jacob asked, incredulous, as he pointed to the trees. "Didn't your sister tell you anything?"

"Yes, she did. Jacob, I would like to thank you for keeping Bella safe when I couldn't," Edward replied.

"I haven't _stopped_ keeping her safe, which is why she's _not_ going in _there_. Do you know what happened the _last_ time you took her in _there_? If Sam hadn't found her, she would have died. And if I wasn't there for her these few past months, she would have rotted from the inside out. I didn't just keep her alive; I saved her from the trail of destruction YOU left behind!" Jacob looked intently at Edward with hatred and focus. Edward's cold expression began to crumple in front of us as pain overcame him.

At first, I didn't know what was happening. Nothing was touching Edward, then I realized what it was. Edward was reading Jacob's thoughts and Jacob was picturing me through Sam's memories of finding me on the forest floor, my zombie-like existence the day I came with the bikes, my recklessness that appeared like attempts at suicide. It upset me to see Edward so distraught, but I was also happy because his distress meant he might still care about me.

"Bella, will you ever forgive me? It was a mistake to leave you. Alice warned me something like this would happen, but I didn't listen," Edward said regretfully. "I'm listening now. And I'm back to protect you, if you'll have me."

What was he talking about? Could it be possible?

"You've had your chance and you BLEW IT! Get the HELL OUT OF HERE!" Jacob shouted louder than I had ever heard him shout before. His face was red with rage and his body shook violently.

"Bella, step away! He's dangerous!" Edward shouted as he appeared at my side. He grabbed my arm and tried to pull me away from Jacob.

"I would NEVER hurt Bella!" Jacob growled.

"You cannot guarantee that you won't lose control when she is near. What if you got angry with her?" Jacob flinched and Edward suddenly looked shocked. After the initial shock of Jacob's thoughts wore off, Edward's facade took on a look of absolute rage. He swung outward with his arm, sending Jacob flying.

"How can you say you care when you KNOW what can happen!" Edward raged.

Jacob was bleeding, but he got up quickly. He came to my side, grabbing the hand Edward had around my arm. Jacob hadn't phased. Edward didn't let go. We all began to shout at once.

"Edward, don't! You're going to hurt him!"

"Get your hands OFF her NOW before I rip your arms out!"

"How DARE you _knowingly_ place her in danger!"

Edward grabbed Jacob again, twisting his arm with one hand, the other still holding onto me, tightly. I was struggling to get free so I could go to Jacob. I was afraid he would be killed.

"DON'T! STOP! LET GO!" I shouted at Edward.

Jacob growled and shook as he started punching Edward with is free hand. I could see the blood pouring from his knuckles. I was sure he was going to phase any minute now, when I heard a deafening bang.

"Get the hell away from my girl!" It was Charlie.

He had his shotgun pointed at Edward as he made his way to me. He walked to us, pulled me away from Edward and pushed me behind him. His shotgun was now aimed right at Edward's head. There were only a few inches from the end of the barrel and Edward's temple.

"Son, you're trespassing." Edward let go of Jacob and slowly raised his hands above his head. Jacob took a step away, looking extremely smug.

"Hey, Charlie. Would you like me to go get your cuffs?" Jacob asked.

"Chief Swan, this was a misunderstanding. Please accept my apologies. I was not trying to hurt Bella. I would never hurt Bella. I was protecting her from Jacob," Edward said, ignoring Jacob's comment.

"Really, Edward? And exactly what was I doing that Bella needed protecting from?" Jacob asked, raising an eyebrow. Edward was silent. They both had secrets. "Yeah, that's what I thought." Jacob turned to Charlie and asked again, "So, you want the cuffs?" Then, an arrogant, spiteful smile appeared on Edward's face. It was a look I had never seen on him before.

"I'll tell you what I was protecting Bella from. From his reckless influence. Chief Swan, I know this was not the time or place to ask for an audience with Bella, but I felt I had to get her away from Jacob Black. He has been endangering Bella all these months," Edward began explaining.

"Be carefull, Cullen," Jacob warned.

"Jacob has built a motorcycle for Bella and taught her how to ride it. He has taken her out riding without a helmet. The stitches on her forehead, the multiple trips to the hospital, they have all been a result of Jacob's influence on her." My mouth just gaped open. I was so angry. I couldn't believe Edward would do this. Why would he tell Charlie this? What did he have to gain by making my life miserable, again?

Charlie lowered the shotgun and looked at me and Jacob. His face was almost purple and Jacob's smug smile was gone. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Billy. I didn't know when he arrived, or how much he heard, but I could see him glaring at Jacob.

"Is this true?" Charlie asked us. I couldn't answer, so I just lowered my head, avoiding his gaze.

"Charlie, I know this all sounds bad right now, but you remember what Bella was like earlier this winter," Jacob began explaining. "She showed up one day at my place with these hunks of junk. I took one look at her and thought she was going to fall over and die, right there in my driveway." Charlie remembered. The anger left his face as sadness consumed him.

"Charlie, it's the only time she came close to smiling. She really wanted me to fix up those bikes for her, and whenever she came by, she talked and smiled. You remember how she started to eat again and look like her old self. I did it for _her_," Jacob said, pleading with Charlie for understanding.

"What about a helmet? Did her _safety_ ever cross your mind?" Edward interjected.

"Okay, _you_," Charlie said, pointing at Edward, "get out of here and don't ever come back. You are _not_ welcome here anymore and never will be again." Edward didn't move. "LEAVE!" Charlie raised his rifle.

Edward looked back at me, sadly, then left our yard.

Charlie looked down with his hand on his forehead, the rifle in his other hand, dangling. Without looking up, he said, "Jacob, I think it's time for you and Billy to go home. Bella is never to ride a motorcycle again. Bella, we need to talk, NOW!" Charlie turned and stormed into the house, slamming the door behind him.

"Jacob, we need to talk, too. Say your goodbyes and meet me by the car in two minutes. If you're not there in TWO minutes, I'm sending Charlie out here to get you," Billy said to Jacob and wheeled away.

Jacob and I stood there looking at each other. Two minutes wasn't enough to say everything we wanted to say. It also wasn't enough to prepare us for our fathers. Vampires and werewolves were an everyday part of our lives now, but I knew that at that moment, the thing we feared most were two middle-aged men. One who was shy and quiet, the other in a wheelchair.

"I'll talk to you later. If you don't hear from me soon that means either Charlie or Billy killed me," Jacob mumbled, then leaned in and kissed my cheek.

"Yeah, same here." I took his hand, gave it a quick squeeze and watched him leave.

I heard the engine of the Rabbit start up shortly and waited in the yard as it drove away.

"ISABELLA SWAN! GET IN HERE NOW!"

That was my cue.

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><p><em>Chapter 5 - Back to School is next where Jacob will surprise Bella once school starts...<em>

_Thank you for reading and reviews are always appreciated._


	5. Back to School

__Thanks go to PurplePrincess77 and ym-tg, both from Project Team Beta who have beta'ed this chapter.__

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><p><strong>Chapter 5<strong>** - Back to School**

I was officially grounded forever. Charlie yelled at me for an hour, then he called Jacob and yelled some more. The only silver lining was that Charlie understood. He knew that the time I had spent fixing the bikes with Jake had brought me back to life. It was the reason Jake was still welcomed in our house-but he had to sell my motorcycle and get a helmet for himself first, of course, because Charlie didn't believe in taking risks. Billy didn't make Jacob sell _his_ bike, but he _did_ get a pretty long lecture. Billy felt he had personally betrayed his friend. He thought that Charlie was already in the dark about a lot of things, so it was unfair to add more.

On Monday, I went to school and discovered the Cullens were officially back.

Carlisle had returned to the hospital with a warm welcome, and Alice and Edward were enrolled back at Forks High. It was awkward. At lunch, the two of them sat at their old table while I sat with Mike, Jessica, and the others. Neither of them were in any of my classes.

At the end of the day, I headed home and was pleasantly surprised to find Jacob waiting for me. I leapt out of my truck as he came to meet me.

"Jake, you're allowed to visit?" I asked.

"Yeah, but only because dad called Charlie this morning to make sure it was okay." He rolled his eyes.

"That's better than me. I can't go anywhere except school, work, and Thriftway."

With a resonant sigh, I took his hand and led him into the house. Once inside, we got settled in the living room and hit the books. Jacob worked quickly through his math while I went over an old quiz. I noticed he was taking the same course I had last year, not sophomore math. It was a little unexpected, but not too unusual.

My curiosity over Jacob's work surpassed any desire to complete corrections. I looked over at his knapsack and noticed an essay hanging out. It was completed, but not marked. I grabbed in and began reading it over, making some edits, and scribbling some suggestions for quotes from the text. Jacob grabbed it from me.

"Hey, what are you doing? That's ready to be handed in, and you're marking it up!"

"I'm improving it." Jacob scanned through my suggestions.

"What's with these quotes? You've _memorized_ this book?"

"Consider yourself lucky. It's a book I like and know well," I said proudly.

"Bells, you're the hottest nerd I know," Jacob replied, then gave his English paper back to me. "So, how was school today?"

"The same, more or less," I answered. "Alice and Edward re-enrolled," I added cautiously.

"Oh. I thought they were only here to get rid of the redheaded leech," Jacob muttered, then went back to his homework.

We worked until Charlie came home, at which time Jacob declined my invitation for dinner and went home.

On Tuesday, I didn't see Jacob at all, nor did he call. I called him a few times, but he was never available.

On Wednesday morning, I was getting ready to leave when I heard a car pull into our driveway. I thought Charlie had forgotten something but was surprised to see Jacob there, leaning on the Rabbit.

"Jake, hi!" I ran to him and we hugged. He gave me a quick kiss on the lips, and I felt myself blush. "What are you doing here? Don't you have school?"

"I do. I'm here to drive you." He was smiling like the cat who ate the canary.

"Oooo-kay. Aren't you going to be late?" I asked.

"Nope."

"That's it? Just 'nope'? Really?"

"I transferred to Forks." Jacob was beaming. I stood speechless, my mouth hung agape.

"How did you do it so late in the year?" I asked, my voice coming back. "Why? You're not losing credits are you?"

"You were right, I'm persistent," he said with a smile. "I could say I transferred to be closer to you, or because they have more AP courses for next year, but..." Jacob shrugged and didn't finish the last sentence. "And no, I'm not going to lose any credits. You know, thanks to my persistent nature. That's what I was busy with yesterday."

"Jake, I don't want you getting started with Edward and Alice, especially at school. You don't need to be there for that reason. We don't even talk to each other."

"Don't worry, Bells, I'll behave. Now, hop in before we're late." Jacob held the door open for me as I climbed in.

When we arrived in the school parking lot, Jessica, Mike, and the others were gathered together, staring.

"Hey Bella, who's this?" Jessica asked.

"That's Jacob. He's just a sophomore," Mike interjected, shooting Jacob a dirty look. Jacob smiled back, amused.

"I just transferred here from the reservation school," Jacob added.

"Are you two, like, together?" Jessica asked, looking down at our clasped hands. I let go hastily.

"We're friends," Jacob replied, saving me from answering. He turned to me then and said, "I'll see you later, Bells. I don't want to be late on my first day." Before walking away, he gave me a quick kiss on the forehead. So much for being just friends.

"Oooo-kay, not dating, huh?" Jessica looked at me with obvious curiosity. "He's sort of big for a sophomore. Was he held back or something?"

"No! Jacob's smart. He's big for his age. He's sixteen, like all the other sophomores." As soon as I said it, I cringed. No matter how many life and death situations I experienced, being a senior girl dating a sophomore was still uncomfortable. It was stupid. I blamed it on being a teenager.

At lunch I saw Jacob sitting with a table full of sophomores. His size made him look out of place, but his face looked youthful and animated as he laughed and joked. I wasn't sure what to do. I wanted to be with Jacob, but I was a senior. On top of that, he seemed animated and engrossed talking to everyone else at his table. He'd been at the school for three hours and already appeared to be the most popular kid in tenth grade. Jacob saw me and waved me over.

"Hi, Jake. How was your first day?" I asked. I was thinking about whether or not to should sit down when Jessica called from our usual table.

"It's been great," Jacob replied, "but your friends are calling you. I'll see you after school, okay?"

"Ah...sure, see you." I gave a little wave, but Jacob got up and kissed the top of my head. I was disappointed Jacob hadn't asked me to join him, but also relieved I didn't have to sit at a table full of sophomores. Of course, the relief also brought on a tinge of guilt.

I walked hesitantly to my usual table. _Everyone_ was staring at me.

"So, are you _sure_ you two aren't dating?" Jessica had a very big grin on her face.

"It's complicated."

"Does _he_ know it's 'complicated'?" Mike asked, jerking his head in Jacob's direction.

"You _do_ realize he's a sophomore, and you're a senior," Lauren commented with a sneer.

I shrugged and ate my lunch in silence.

On Thursday, Jacob showed up at my house on his motorcycle.

"You know if I get on that thing, I'll be sent to a convent."

"You're not riding. I'm going to follow you. My patrol shift starts this afternoon so I have to leave my last class half way through. Dad actually wrote me a note." Jacob rolled his eyes. "I feel like I'm in second grade."

I was disappointed. I enjoyed having Jacob drive me home and stay to do homework. If he was starting his shift in the afternoon, that meant I wouldn't see him later today at all. Unless...

"What did Billy write in the note?" Jacob handed me a folded piece of paper from his pocket.

_Please allow Jacob to leave his last class early for a doctor's appointment. Thank you for understanding._

_Billy Black_

"It doesn't say what time. Why don't you get the work you need from your last class and ditch most of it? I'll ditch with you, that way we can have some time together before patrol. Please?"

"Since when do you ditch classes?"

"Since now. I'll get notes from Jessica later."

"Sure, sure. Just promise me if Charlie finds out, you'll take the fall. _You_ he won't shoot."

I didn't bother showing up at all to my last class. It was easier than having to come up with a lie. Of course, Jacob was going to be in his for a few minutes a least, so I waited in my truck, reading a book. The book was engrossing enough that I hadn't noticed someone had walked up to the driver's side window. Of course, I may not have noticed this person even if I hadn't been preoccupied.

"Hello, Bella," Edward said. I nodded in acknowledgement, unable to speak.

"May I speak to you for a moment?" He asked. I nodded. It appeared I had become mute. What was wrong with me? I stepped out of the truck and leaned against the closed door. "I'm terribly sorry about the other night. I realize how inappropriate it was for me to show up, unannounced. I missed you terribly."

"You didn't have to tell Charlie about the motorcycle." The reminder of that night gave me my voice back. "And what do you mean by you 'missed' me? _You _left _me, _remember_? _You told me you didn't want me anymore."

"Bella, don't you know me better than that? I could never stop loving you. It hurt that you believed me so easily." Edward's face took on a momentary change, but he regained his composure quickly, the blank, unreadable expression back. "I left because I thought it was the only way to ensure your safety. I loved you then, and I still love you. I will always love you. Those things I said to you that day I said because I knew it was the only way you would let me go."

Edward reached for my hand and took it in his. It was cool against my skin, sending shivers up my spine. Edward inched closer to me, his lips only an inch from mine. He let out a breath, intoxicating me with is scent. I found myself lost in his mesmerizing beauty.

"Bella, being separated from you these months, and then thinking you were dead, has taught me that I can't be without you. I'll do anything to get you back, and I promise never to leave you again."

Time stood still, air no longer filing my lungs.

"Edward, things have happened since you've been away. I love Jacob."

"Do you still love me too?"

"I do, but I'm _with_ Jacob," I whispered.

"You're with him-for now-but you love me too." He stroked my cheek with the back of his hand. "I have all the time in the world to get you back, Bella. I refuse to leave you with..._animals_."

"You have no say in the matter, Edward. The decision is mine alone, and Jacob is _not_ an animal!" How could his view be so narrow when he was a _vampire_?

"I'm talking about their behaviour. I realize Jacob is unlikely to hurt you on _purpose_, but Sam never meant to hurt Emily either." Something about the tone of his voice and the look on his face was wrong. Sure, he may be concerned about my safety, but there was more to it than that. I looked at him intently and noticed something behind his cool facade I hadn't seen before. Perfect, beautiful, talented Edward was jealous.

"You're right, Sam _didn't_ _mean_ to hurt Emily. But Jasper _wanted_ to hurt me on my birthday, didn't he?" Bitterness touched every word. I hated that Edward was making the wolves out to be monsters. He, of all people, should have known better. But my anger wasn't enough to take away the regret at seeing his defeated face.

"It's not the same."

"How is it not the same?"

"We've had decades to learn to control our urges. Those wolves are young and out of control. So much of what they do is determined by impulses, rather than reasoning." The disdain in his voice eroded any regret or sympathy I had.

"I would say that your decades of mastering control has resulted in the same level of danger, where I'm concerned, as the wolves have ever posed." It was true; Jasper lost it once, and Paul lost it once. As far as I was concerned, the score was even.

"I would never disfigure you the way Sam has Emily," Edward spat in disgust. It made me fume. How dare he compare Jacob to Sam? I knew it wasn't Sam's fault, but I still didn't like his influence over Jacob and certainly did not like him being equated with Jacob either.

"He is nothing like Sam! And nothing like you! Jacob would never hurt me or leave me! Even when Sam ordered Jacob to stop seeing me, he found a way!" I shouted through tears. "What about you, Edward? If you loved me, why did _you_ leave, of your own free will? I almost died because of you!" The old wounds began to open up again. "You think you can tell me you didn't mean it and everything will go back to what it was before? _Nothing_ is the same now! You don't know what I've been through and what Jacob has done for me. I'm only now beginning to put the pieces back together, and you're telling me you didn't _mean_ any of it? Why didn't you tell me the truth back then?"

"You never would have let me go if I hadn't said what I'd said."

"Really? That's your reason? I'm slow, clumsy, and human. What could I have done to stop you?" Tears began streaming down my face. I was upset that everything we once had was ruined because he refused to tell me the truth. If he had told me the truth that day, _everything_ would have been different. Even if he still left, at least I would have known I was loved, that I was still good enough.

"I am too weak to refuse you, Bella. If you begged, I couldn't have said no," Edward replied.

"Really? You left for _my_ _own good_, for my safety, but if I asked, you'd sacrifice _my_ _life_ so you wouldn't have to say _no_? Is that what you're telling me? Either you love me enough to be strong, no matter what, or you don't! Which is it Edward?" I formed fists with my hands and started hitting his chest, tears pouring down my face.

"Leave me alone, Edward! Go away! If you loved me, you wouldn't have left me alone in the woods, feeling smaller than I've ever felt before." I fell to my knees, my fists throbbing with pain. Edward reached for me, but I pushed his hand away. "If you had the strength to leave someone you loved as much as I loved you, saying no would have been easy in comparison. Saying no should have been effortless compared to shattering your true love's self worth. I would have done ANYTHING for you, for anyone I love. And I have. I faced James to save my mother. Me, a human! And invincible, immortal you, couldn't spare me a little pain because you couldn't say _no_?" Edward reached down, grabbed my bruised hands and tried to lift me up onto my feet.

"Get your hands OFF her, NOW!" I didn't have to turn around to know who it was. Edward released me, and Jacob pulled me to his side. "Are you okay, Bella? Are you hurt?" He inspected my hands, barely touching the bruises.

"I'm fine, Jake." I was fine now that he was here.

"Bella, please, let me explain. I want to make you understand. I only ask for a moment alone, to talk." Edward reached for me.

"She's not going anywhere with you," Jacob barked, pulling me closer.

"I was asking _her_, not you."

They both looked at me. Then Edward looked over at Jacob, smiled, and looked back to me.

"You're skipping class for _him_?" Edward asked.

"What are you going to do about it, Cullen, snitch on her again?" Jacob sneered. "I thought you were a hundred or something, not some snotty nosed six year old. Speaking of which, don't you think you should be chasing someone your own age? Just because you _look_ seventeen doesn't mean you actually _are_. This is worse than if Mr. Banner were after Bella..."

For a moment, Edward was rendered speechless. I had to admit, I was a little uncomfortable myself. Edward always seemed like a teenager to me, but he really wasn't. How could the two years between me and Jake bother me, when the almost hundred years between me and Edward never entered my thoughts?

"I owe you no explanations, Jacob, and I do not like your insinuating thoughts. _That_ is not what I am! My love for Bella is pure."

"You don't like my thoughts? Then get the hell out of my head!"

"If you didn't shout every thought you had I wouldn't go anywhere near your basal imaginings! Not that I'm explaining for your benefit..." He turned to me. "I may have roamed this earth for over a century, but I am not so different from you, Bella. I am still in my youth where love is concerned. You are the only woman I have ever loved, and the only one I have ever been with," he finished with such tenderness that it made me want to drift to his side.

"Are you telling me you're a hundred-year-old virgin?" Jacob snickered, breaking me out of my reverie. It was an effort for me to suppress a giggle too. Jacob looked down at me, pleased that I saw the humor in what he said.

"Of course that's what you would be thinking of. Such a typical, immature response, one without dignity I might add."

"Well, excuse me for actually _being_ a teenager! My thoughts are not meant to be shared, nobody's are!" Jacob shouted. "And I'm not thinking about anything ugly. You're just interpreting it that way. I would never do anything Bella didn't want, but _I_ can do everything she _does_ want!"

Jacob stared him down, smug. Edward seethed.

"Bella, I know you hold a great deal of affection for..._him, _but I believe I deserve a moment alone with you to talk-in private."

I turned, intending to go with Edward. It was only to talk, and I had things to say too, but Jacob took hold of my arm, stopping me.

"Bella, don't go. Talk to him here. I won't say anything. Please, just don't go with him. Don't leave my sight-with _him_. You know what he does to you!"

"What are you talking about? He doesn't _do_ anything to me." I said the words, but I wasn't sure if I believed them. Edward _did_ have an effect on me, but it was nothing I could define or explain. Wasn't it love?

"Jacob, what are you afraid of? Don't you trust her feelings for you?" Edward asked.

Jacob ignored him, turning to me instead. His eyes begged me for understanding, as he took hold of my hands, knelt down, and spoke.

"Bella, you're hanging on by a thread. If you go with him now, you're going to be lost to me, forever. I know it. I can _feel_ it."

"If you lose her, it will only be because she loves me more," Edward interjected.

Jacob's gaze did not move from mine.

"He's a _drug_ to you, Bella," Jacob admonished. Edward turned away and I glimpsed a brief look of horror cross his face. Jacob noticed it too. "Is she the same for you, too?" he asked, looking at Edward. "Do you love her like a woman or a bag of blood? Can you even tell the difference?"

"Jacob, you don't know what we had," I said quietly. "You weren't part of what we shared."

"I saw the look on your face just now and on his. I know enough." Jacob turned to Edward and asked, "When I saw Bella for the first time, after she moved back to Forks, I noticed how shy she was, how much she seemed to dislike the cold and being around the other kids. I noticed how easily she blushed and the way she bit her lower lip. How long was it before you noticed any of those things? How long was it before you saw her as a person, and not your next meal? As much as you say you love her, I bet she you _still_ feel like sucking her dry."

"Jacob!" I shouted, but Edward silenced me with a gesture of his hand. He didn't say anything, only looking at me with guilt in his eyes. His head turned away, hanging in shame.

Jacob looked down at our clasped hands and took a deep breath.

"Look, I know, Bella, that you have things to talk about with him. As much as I hate it, I won't stop you, but wait, please," Jacob implored. "He had six or seven months with you, didn't he? Give me the same. I'll start counting from the day you showed up with the bikes. Just give me the same time and then you can go with him for as long as you need to. Give me the six months, and I'll show you how strong you are, that you can be happy without your fix."

Edward backed far enough away at Jacob's last remark, that he was now next to his Volvo. Jacob understood more than either of us had given him credit for.

I looked to Edward, but he wouldn't meet my gaze. I looked back at Jacob as he waited for my answer. He wanted me more than anything, or anyone. He wanted me as much as I had once wanted Edward. I kept him at arm's length because I didn't want to hurt him, but who was I to decide what was best for him? I hated how Edward had left me for my own good, leaving me out of the decision. It would be different if I didn't love Jacob, but I did. I realized it wasn't up to me to decide if my love, limited or not, was enough for him, or if it was what he deserved. Just as it hadn't been Edward's right to decide what was best for _me_, and what life I deserved.

"Okay, Jake, okay." I was swept me into a desperate embrace with Jacob's face buried in my hair.

"I love you, I love you, I love you. I'll make you happier than you've ever imagined," he whispered.

We stood holding each other. I didn't know how much time had passed when the roar of an engine broke the silence. Edward's silver Volvo was speeding out of the parking lot.

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><p><em><em>Thanks to all those that have added my story to their<em>_ favorites__ and alerts. Many thanks also for the lovely reviews. If you haven't left a review yet, now's your chance. I appreciate reviews-a lot (and reply to them too).__


	6. Suspicion

__Thank you My-Heart-of-Music of PTB for beta'ing this chapter!__

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><p><strong>Chapter 6 - Suspicion<strong>

Things were tense. The Cullens and the wolves re-established the treaty lines and patrolled their own territory. At school, Edward made an effort to stay away from me and Jacob, which made it a little easier, but his presence was never forgotten. Having Jacob at the same school as me wasn't all a bed of roses either. Lunch was still awkward. Jacob didn't want me to feel I had to spend it with him, especially since I didn't like undo attention. At first we sat separately, but eventually, we ended up together, at one table to ourselves. It didn't take long for Angela and Ben to join us. Angela was always so good at noticing the needs of others. The rest of that group stayed at the old table, but it as time passed the two tables drifted closer together until they were right next to each other.

Another thing drifted together. Alice started talking to me. It began with a smile and a wave in passing. A couple of times we bumped into each other in the bathroom and said hello. Eventually, we exchanged niceties when she paused by my locker or in the parking lot while I waited for Jacob. After a while, it felt like we were friends again. I knew Jacob wasn't thrilled about this development, but he never said anything about it, and I appreciated that.

Now, it was routine for Alice and me to stand together in conversation in the parking lot after school until Jake got there. She had updated me weeks ago on what happened in Seattle. Victoria and Riley seemed to have disappeared for the time being and the Cullens had destroyed all the newborns. Unfortunately, neither Edward's presence nor the destruction of the newborns had altered the future enough. Alice still saw the Volturi coming.

One day after school, Alice was leaning through the window of my truck, chatting with me when suddenly, she froze. Her banter stopped mid-sentence, and a blank look adorned her face. I knew that look. I asked her what she had seen but before she could answer, Edward appeared, took her arm, and announced it was time to go home. Alice wouldn't budge. The two of them stood there staring at each other. I knew she was giving him a piece of her mind. Unfortunately, it was all _in_ her mind; thus, I wasn't privy to the conversation. Eventually, Edward won the staring contest and the two of them left. Alice looked back at me, shrugged, and mouthed, "It'll be okay."

As Alice and Edward left in the Volvo, I saw Jacob approaching, waving goodbye to a few classmates. He was now a regular presence in my life. With Victoria and Riley nowhere in sight, and the additional pack members (Quil had joined recently), Jacob's patrol shifts were less frequent and shorter.

Most days, he picked me up for school in the morning, and we went to my house afterwards. We spent our time doing school work, talking about anything and everything, and revisited those earlier kisses, frequently. They were passion-filled but still relaxed. Jacob didn't abruptly stop my advances, but he always slowed things down gradually, often using humor. It took away any awkwardness such a situation would normally instill. He always knew how much was enough for me. Jacob was a good referee after all.

Sometimes, he stayed for dinner, too. I made a point of sending him with leftovers for Billy on those days. It was all so comfortable. The best part was how relaxed Charlie was around Jacob. Seeing them together made me realize how much of my life was spent _without_ Charlie in it. I knew the ease he felt around Jake was because he had known him since he was a baby.

Jacob arrived next to me, stirring me from my thoughts. He gave me a kiss on the cheek, took my bag, and asked, "Hey beautiful, how was school?"

"You know, the usual. Alice stopped to chat," I replied. We got in the Rabbit, and he drove us to my house.

Once there, we went inside and headed upstairs. Charlie seemed okay with us doing our homework in my room, as long as the door was left open. It was the most practical place since the computer was there.

I had my foot on the first step of the staircase, making my way up, and Jacob had just closed the front door behind him, when suddenly he darted past me, taking the stairs three at a time. When I caught up to him, he was in my room staring at the bed. His face was red, and his arms were shaking. Sweat was dripping down his neck.

I put my hand on his arm in an attempt to calm him. His skin was hot, almost burning.

"Jake, what's wrong?" He was breathing heavily and wouldn't look at me.

"Why was Edward in your bedroom?" I saw the whites of his eyes go red and glossy with moisture, just as my own were welling up with tears. What had I done to make him think I would betray him?

"Jacob, Edward hasn't been in here since... Jake, please, tell me why you're saying this?"

"I smelled a vampire and when I came in here, I realized the scent was Edward's." His voice was flat and cold.

"I told you, he hasn't been in here... I don't understand..." I stopped mid-sentence when I noticed an envelope on my night table. It was addressed to me in Edward's perfect script. I picked it up and showed it to Jacob. "He must have been in here while I was at school, to drop this off." That made Jacob frown.

"Doesn't he know Charlie's a cop, and breaking into your bedroom is a crime?"

"He's not 'breaking in' anywhere... it's just the way he... well, the way he _used_ to..." I had never considered how inappropriate Edward's past behaviour actually was until I was faced with the need to explain it. No matter how I worded it in my mind, I couldn't make it sound like a good thing. I couldn't because it wasn't.

"What? You don't think it's creepy that your ex-boyfriend-who your father has already told at gunpoint that he's not allowed to come here anymore-has been sneaking into your bedroom while you've been out? Does this mean _I_ can sneak in here whenever I want and root through your stuff, maybe read your diary or something?"

"I don't have a diary...and you've slept outside my window before!" I pointed out.

"Yeah, 'outside' being the key operative word. Also worth noting, I'm not your _ex_ and Charlie did _not_ threaten to blow _me_ to kingdom come if I came on his property." How was Jacob always able to find all that was negative about Edward? And, they were always things I had once thought to be endearing! Had I been blind or was Jacob just very good at manipulating things to appear the way he wanted them to?

"Look, why don't we find out what he wanted," I said, opening the envelope in hopes of dropping conversation. No matter how I looked at it, either I was stupid and delusional while dating Edward, or Jacob was a master manipulator.

Inside the envelope, I was surprised to find the tickets to Jacksonville from my last birthday. It seemed strange Edward felt he had to break into my bedroom to deliver these. He could have had Alice pass them on to me, if he didn't want to approach me himself. "It's my birthday gift from Carlisle and Esme, from last year. They're airline tickets to see my mom in Florida." Jacob leaned over to look at the envelope contents.

"Why are there _two_ tickets, and why did _Edward_ have them?" Jacob made no effort to hide his suspicions.

"Edward took everything that had anything to do with him when he left me. The other ticket was for Ed- for a companion," I replied.

"How often did that creep sneak into your room? He didn't do this before you started seeing him, did he?"

The disgust in Jacob's voice was mirrored by my own. Forced to see the situation from the outside looking in showed me a very different perspective than the one I had always had in my mind of his observations. I wanted to think about something else, anything else.

"Look, they're going to expire soon," I said. "It'd be a shame for them to go to waste. Have you ever been to Florida?" I gave Jacob the brightest smile I could muster.

"No. Are you asking _me_ to be your 'companion'?" Jacob's mouth curling up into a smile.

"If you think you can stomach my mother's culinary experiments," I replied.

"Bells, you've seen me and the rest of the pack eat. You could put Mickey Mouse on a plate, and he'd probably be halfway through my large intestines before I realized it wasn't really food."

"Jake, gross! I _like_ Mickey!"

"Figures. Mickey's for pansies. Everyone knows Bugs Bunny's the coolest cartoon character ever."

"Well, Mickey doesn't live in Jacksonville, so I guess there'll be no loyalty issues."

"Sounds great, but aren't you grounded?"

"Charlie won't mind if I visit my mom using free tickets. What about Billy?"

"As long as I don't miss too much school, especially if Charlie's on board."

Jacob took the tickets out of the envelope and began inspecting them. His eyebrows furrowed.

"What? You can't use smelly airline tickets?" I asked, trying to lighten the mood.

"They _do_ smell, but I'm wondering why he's giving them back to you _now._"

"He probably forgot he had them," I replied with a shrug.

"I don't trust him. He wouldn't forget. If _I_ had taken everything I ever gave you, I'd _never_ forget. I'd probably look at the stuff every day. Did he give back anything else?"

"What makes you think there was anything else?" Jacob didn't answer, but he looked at me skeptically. Who was I kidding? What was the point in lying if I couldn't do it convincingly. "No." I sighed. "He didn't give back anything else. Nothing else was valuable." _Not monetarily_, I thought to myself.

"Will you call him, for me? I have a bad feeling about this." Jacob grabbed the phone from my night table and handed it to me.

"What am I supposed to say?" I really didn't want to call. Things had been peaceful for almost two months, and I didn't want anything to ruin that.

"Say thanks or something, but call, please? It'll ease my mind." Jacob smiled. His teeth gleamed, and his eyes sparkled. Oh, he was impossible! I grabbed the phone from him and started dialling. The first ring barely registered on my end before it was answered.

"Oh, hi, Rosalie." Great, of all the people who _could_ have answered the phone, it _had_ to be the one who hated me. "Um, is Edward available?" Rosalie didn't bother to reply. Instead, I heard some shuffling on the other end, then Edward's salutation.

"Oh, um. Hi, Edward, it's Bella." As if he wouldn't recognize my voice.

_"Hello, Bella, it's lovely to hear from you." _

"I...ah...got the tickets, thanks. I mean, please tell Esme and Carlisle thanks."

_"Will you be using them soon, Bella?" _Edward asked.

"Um...yeah, Jake and I...we're thinking of using them soon," I answered.

_"Oh yes, I suppose he'll be using the...extra ticket. Well, you do realize they are going to expire very soon, in less than two weeks."_

"Yes, I noticed."

_"Do you know when you'll be leaving?" _He seemed too curious about our plans.

"We haven't discussed an exact date ye-" I didn't get to finish because Jake grabbed the phone away from me.

"Okay, Cullen, enough of this bull. What's this all about?" Jacob barked. "Don't give me that crap; you know what I'm talking about... Why now? ...Yeah, like you'd forget. I don't believe you... Uh huh, sure. Whatever... We'll go whenever the hell we feel like going, why do you care? ...I don't know what you're up to, but I _know_ you're up to something. We'll be watching you." Jacob slammed the phone down. I didn't need to hear the other end of the conversation to know what had transpired.

"I don't think we should go," Jacob said. His arms were crossed in front of him.

"It might be nice to get away from here. You know, from... _everything_. Even if Edward _is_ up to something, you can have Sam keep an eye on things, and you'll be with me the whole time so it won't have anything to do with me." I was getting a little suspicious myself, but I knew Edward wouldn't harm anyone, at least I thought so. And I really did want to go away with Jacob. "Come on, you'll love Florida, and I know my mom's going to be crazy about you."

Just then, we heard Charlie's cruiser pull up into the driveway. Jacob opened his school bag and started taking out some books. I went downstairs to greet Charlie.

"Hey Bells, I see Jake's here again. You kids doing homework?"

"Yeah. Actually, I wanted to ask you something. I came across these airline tickets Carlisle and Esme gave me on my birthday last year, to visit mom. They're going to expire soon. Do you mind if we go next week?"

"Of course not, Renee'll be ecstatic. It's been a while since you've seen each other."

"Uh, Dad, maybe you didn't hear me. There are ticket_s_, as in _plural_. There's a companion ticket, too for... Well, I was wondering if you'd be okay with Jacob going with me. We'd stay with Renee and Phil, of course."

Charlie raised an eyebrow. "Well, as long as it's okay with Billy, I guess..."

I jumped up and kissed on the cheek. "Thanks Dad, love you!" I raced upstairs with the good news.

"Look, even Charlie's okay with us going. What do you say? Wanna go away with me?" I asked. Jacob's face finally relaxed into a sunny smile.

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><p>It seemed like an eternity before our departure date arrived, but in reality, it was only a week. Luckily for us, the Cullens never did anything half way, so our tickets were business class. I looked over at Jacob taking up every square inch of space he was allotted-and some of mine as well-and wondered how he'd ever fare in economy. He held my hand, but his face was glued to the window. It was the first time he had flown on a plane. In fact, it was the first time he had left the state of Washington, in human form, until now.<p>

It was the best trip. Renee and Jacob got along so well. Both were outgoing, laid back, and enthusiastic. Sometimes, Phil and I exchanged looks wondering how the two of them were able to carry on a proper conversation. They were constantly talking, joking, and interrupting each other, yet they were always smiling and laughing. Renee seemed genuinely pleased to have Jacob around. She actually liked that Jacob pretty much ate her and Phil out of house and home, regardless of the menu. This was quite a feat considering all the special concoctions my mother thought up for our special visit. Jacob also pitched in with household chores, and tinkered with Phil's car, tweaking a few things here and there. It felt like we had been together for years, not just a few days.

We spent a good portion of our visit at the beach. Of course, Jacob was a stellar swimmer, and if it weren't for him, I probably would have drowned in the surf multiple times. Often, he ran out into the water with me on his shoulders, and tossed me in once he was deep enough. I'd splash him with all the gusto I had, only to scatter a few drops on his shoulders. Even at close range, my aim sucked. It was bliss. The blazing sun beat down on my skin, the humid air blew into my face, the cool Atlantic ocean lapped around me, and Jacob was with me for every moment of it.

One day at the beach, I was wading in the water watching as he floated on his back next to me. He was so beautiful. The sunlight glistened off his wet body. It was hard to believe he was mine. I placed my open palm on his abdomen, needing to remind myself he wasn't a dream. His warm, supple flesh was so inviting. My hand slowly slid downward making its way toward his bathing suit. He shuddered and stood up, took hold of my wrist, and smiled. Before I had time to protest, I was engulfed in his embraced, kissing him while in the ocean. The water lapped around us, comforting me with its quiet splashes. I felt the contours of every muscle in his body that touched mine. It was thrilling, kissing him while being enveloped by the wind and waves, my skin touching his. Nothing was between us.

A disappointed groan escaped when we pulled away, but my eyes opened to Jacob's smiling face. "Bells, you're going to be the death of me."

"It's not my fault that you're completely irresistible." Feeling self conscious now that I had been shaken from my trance, I took a quick look around at our surroundings.

The beach was crowded, and I saw a few other teenagers. Almost every girl was looking at us, some of them not exactly girls either, more like women-well in their twenties. Actually, they were all gawking at Jacob. I couldn't blame them; after all, I spent my fair share of time gawking at him, too. I looked at him then, down at myself, and became very aware of how pale, thin and..._straight_ my body looked. It didn't help, that in my modesty, the only bathing suit I owned was a one piece sports suit that crushed what little chest I had to begin with. I wrapped my arms around myself, feeling insignificant and ugly. I felt the eyes of every bikini clad girl looking our way, desiring Jacob, sizing me up, and concluding I was no competition.

Jacob saw my discomfort, and he moved my hands away from my body, pulled me close, lifted me up, and whirled me around in the water. "You're the most beautiful girl here, Bella. You're always the most beautiful girl, wherever we are," he said to me, as he put me down.

My arms flung around his neck and he lifted me up so we were face to face. We kissed, and this time I wrapped my legs around him. Jacob held on tightly, keeping my body flush on his, despite the waves crashing against us. The fervor and passion in his kisses left me feeling loved, wanted, and deserving. We were alone in the world. The heat from his chest matched the heat of the sun. Tears welled behind my closed eyelids. My love for Jacob was as clear as the sky above us. He found me as irresistible as I found him.

"I'm so in love with you, Jacob," I whispered hoarsely. "You make everything better."

"I know you love me, Bells. I've known before you, probably. But, it doesn't mean I don't love hearing it." Jacob's happiness radiated so brightly it nearly outshone the sun. It was bliss to be in love with Jacob.

When our time was up, we regretfully said our goodbye and board our flight. It was the latest one I could find without missing another day of school. We didn't land in Sea-Tac until after dark. Charlie had insisted on picking us up at the airport, so we drove back to Forks with Jake in the back of the cruiser.

Jacob had left his car at our place so he could drive home instead of making Charlie drive all the way out to La Push. I wanted Jacob to stay, but he said he had to go. He gave me a quick kiss on the forehead and drove off. I started going into the house sluggishly with Charlie close behind.

"So, I spoke with Renee," Charlie commented. "She says you kids had a good time. She seems to have taken a liking to Jacob, couldn't stop talking about him. I was starting to get tired of listening after a while."

"Yeah, mom and Jake got along. They have more in common than I realized," I answered.

Charlie was quiet for a moment. He looked at me like he had to say something he didn't want to.

"While you were gone, Edward called a few times. He wanted to know where you were and when you'd be coming back. Even after I told him when you'd be returning, he still called to make sure your plans hadn't changed. I don't know what's going on with him, or you, or whatever, but... You know, I think Jacob's really fallen for you. I mean, it's none of my business, but he and Billy are family to me, and I wouldn't want Jacob to be thinking... not if you and Edward... crap." Charlie looked embarrassed. He waved his hands around and ended his speech with, "Well, I'm sure you'll do the right thing, you're a good kid."

"Dad, there's nothing going on with me and Edward! I haven't seen him outside of school since he returned, and even then, we don't talk to each other." I decided Charlie didn't need to know about our encounter in the school parking lot. "To be honest, I have no idea why he'd call, or why he'd care where I am, or what I'm doing." With that, I stomped upstairs and went to my room.

I was angry and sad. I was angry Edward was insinuating himself in my life and making me believe Jacob was right to suspect him of ulterior motives. I was sad because I knew Edward was in pain and all he wanted was a chance to talk. I still cared, and I still loved him, so his hurt caused me to hurt. I wanted to talk to him too, to get answers to the many questions I've had since he left last fall. I also felt I should help him find peace with our separation. I just didn't know how to do it.

It wasn't right to have this discussion with Edward over the phone, but I wanted to honor Jacob's request. It didn't seem unreasonable for Jacob to ask that I give our relationship a chance before running back to Edward. Not that I believed I'd run back into his arms, but it wasn't completely out of the realm of possibility either.

How could I make Jacob understand that I _had_ to talk to Edward? Was was Jacob so desperately insecure when it came to me? He was usually so confident, almost cocky. He always believed he wielded the power to make anything happen, as long as he was willing to give it his best effort. Was I so good at destroying everything I touched that I had stripped Jacob of this without even noticing?

The elation of the trip completely faded. I couldn't get away from the churning emotions that had been brought up. I was conflicted by my loyalty to Jacob and my obligation to Edward. I didn't know what to do, so I didn't unpack, I didn't brush my teeth, and I didn't change my clothes. I lay on my bed with my head on the pillow. I had school in the morning, but I didn't care. I didn't want to move until the sun rose again in the morning. I just wanted this night to end so I could start anew tomorrow.

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><p><em>Chapter 7 - Doubt is next!<em>

_Find out what Bella does about Edward's nosiness. And exactly what was / is he up to? We all know there's something going on..._

_Jacob will also surprise everyone - including himself._

_Thanks to everyone who have added my story to their__ favorites__ and alerts. Many thanks - again - for the lovely reviews. If you haven't reviewed yet, it's not too late! You'll make an author smile!_


	7. Doubt

_Special thanks go out to nikkipattinson, my Twilighted validation beta, who went above and beyond the call of duty to give me some "emergency" beta services for this chapter!_

_Let's see what Jacob does that takes everyone by surprise..._

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><p><strong>Chapter 7 - Doubt<strong>

It had gotten late. I was lying in my bed, deep in thought. Earlier, I heard Charlie come upstairs. He paused outside my door for a moment, but decided to proceed straight to his room.

I knew I couldn't stay in bed fuming and wondering all night, but I certainly wasn't going to fall asleep anytime soon. There were too many questions to ask Edward, not the mention the things I wanted to get off my chest. Jacob was with me all day at school—and afterwards—I knew this might be my only chance to see Edward alone. If I didn't go tonight, Jacob would try to stop me. I thought about my promise to him-about giving him time-but this couldn't wait months. I hated breaking my promise to Jacob, but I had to do this. It would bring closure to my relationship with Edward.

I grabbed the keys and went downstairs as quietly as possible.

In order to ensure Charlie didn't wake up, I had to put the truck in neutral and push it down the street. The roar of the engine was loud enough to wake the dead, especially in the still of the night. Thankfully, I had backed onto the driveway today, and it was a downhill grade, even if it was only slight. As it was, every muscle in my body ached from pushing.

I drove along the familiar road and for once, wished that my truck could go faster. It seemed to take forever to get to the Cullen house. Once there, I sat in my truck for a few minutes, gathering my thoughts. I wasn't exactly looking _forward_ to doing what I had planned, but it certainly seemed necessary. I took a deep breath, got out, and walked up to the house.

Alice opened the door before I rang the doorbell. She gave me a hug and led me in, chatting the whole time.

"Bella, I wish you were here for other reasons. I told Edward to stop bothering Charlie, but I think my inability to see you bothered him more than me. He was afraid you would come back before we got Victoria and Riley," Alice relayed casually, as though it were idle gossip.

"Victoria and Riley were here? Is that why Edward wanted me to leave?" I now regretted talking Jacob out of his suspicions.

Alice sighed loudly.

"Yes, they were here. That's what my vision was-that day in the parking lot. I saw you get killed by them, so Edward took those tickets out of hiding in hopes that you would leave town. I couldn't tell exactly which day they would arrive, but I knew it would be soon. They were here yesterday..." Alice didn't sound quite finished. It felt like there was something she was leaving out.

"Alice, did something _else_ happen that I should know about?" I felt a bubble of anger forming inside, getting larger with every second of silence that passed.

"I _told_ Edward we should tell you, but he wouldn't let me. He didn't even want to share the information with Sam. There were just the two of them, so we decided to head them off where the treaty line crossed in the forest. We thought we would destroy them easily, but there was a...complication." Alice paused here, as though she were afraid to share more.

"Alice, you have to tell me _everything_. I'm going to find out eventually." I was upset that Edward had kept secrets from me-as he had a in the past-for my own safety. It was _my_ life, and I should be allowed to actively participate in it.

"Bella, don't get angry-everyone's fine. I'll tell you everything, but remember what I said, everyones fine, okay?"

"I'll let you speak, but I can't promise I won't get angry."

"Riley crossed over the treaty line and Victoria got away from us long enough to get to Forks," Alice began. "The two wolves on patrol that night chased Riley into the ocean and then caught Victoria's scent. When they figured out she was headed for Forks, they ignored the treaty and went after her.

"The wolves followed her scent to your neighborhood. One of them-the Clearwater boy-phased into human form and talked Charlie into leaving the house. He was waiting until Charlie had driven off before phasing back, but he got attacked by Victoria while still human. We caught up with them quickly, but the boy and his sister were already injured by then. Victoria was about to... Well, Edward read her thoughts as we approached and had time to leap in between her and the boy before he-Seth-got bitten. Everyone's fine now, Bella."

Of course, Edward would be the first to arrive because he was the fastest. Tears formed in my eyes. Seth and Leah had risked their lives to save my father. I should have been there too. If I were home, Seth could have warned me and taken off into the forest to phase back to wolf right away. He wouldn't have to wait for Charlie to leave. My sadness gave way to anger. Why wasn't I told? Charlie had almost been killed in his own house! Seth and Leah nearly died! Where was I? I was sent away to hide like a selfish coward.

I wiped the tears from my face, seething. Ready to let out my rage on Alice, I looked up, but she was no longer alone. Edward had appeared and had taken his spot next to her.

"I should have been told," I said to both of them. "You risked Charlie's life! If you had told me, I would have found a way to make him go somewhere, anywhere. You _know_ I would have!"

"Bella, I wanted to, but he knew you wouldn't leave." Alice nodded towards Edward.

"I know you're angry, but I had to be sure you were safe. You know we would never allow anything to happen to Charlie," Edward added.

"Really, Edward? That's your reason, _again_? You haven't learned from the last time that I don't want you to lie to me—even for my own safety Charlie's MY family, not yours, not Alice's, not anyone's! He is MY business and I had a right to know!" I shouted shakily.

Edward reached out to take my hand. I looked down and noticed a scar on his arm. It looked the same as mine. I jerked away from his touch, and he pulled his sleeve down over the white crescent scar.

"Please forgive me, Bella," Edward pleaded. "I couldn't bear the thought of losing you. Can't you see? You are my reason for existing. Losing you would be worse than being destroyed. You are not mine anymore, so I wasn't sure you would hide away with me. I had to get you far from here."

"I didn't have to go away! Charlie and I wouldn't have been unprotected! You left him to die!"

"Charlie is fine, Bella. We were confident we would catch Victoria before she reached town. There were seven of us, and we had Alice, too," Edward replied.

"How _dare_ you? You sacrificed my father's safety so you wouldn't have to go through the pain of _mourning_ me!" How dare he risk Charlie's life to prevent _himself_ from going through the agony and turmoil he had left _me_ in not so long ago? "You said you cared about me, that all you wanted was for me to be happy. In what fantasy do you see me living happily ever after with Charlie dead at the hands of someone who was out to kill _me_? Did you even consider that you and your family might fail? I know you're good at almost everything, but you aren't perfect!"

"You're right, I am far from perfect. It was arrogant of me to think we couldn't fail," Edward acknowledged. "But if my actions were wrong, my intentions were not. I wanted only to protect you, Bella. It's my responsibility to keep you safe. I'm only sorry I wasn't here to do it sooner." Edward approached me with outstretched hands and reached to hold mine in his. I took a step back, away from him.

"If your intent was my safety and getting Victoria out of my life, then why did you keep this from the pack? You knew they wanted to kill her too." I didn't bother waiting for an answer before starting in with accusations. "I don't think this was about keeping me safe. You act so civil, like you're above petty, human motivations, but you're not. You've turned bitter and envious, Edward. You weren't thinking logically. It was arrogant pride that kept you from involving Jacob, wasn't it?" His silence was my answer. "You didn't want him to be the one to get Victoria. You wanted to make sure _you_ were the one to kill her. Does it bother you more that Jacob has been my protector since you've abandoned me, or that Victoria is still chasing me?"

"Bella, how can you say those things? You know I would sacrifice anything for your safety. It's all I care about." I didn't believe everything he said. My accusations still rang true in my mind. It seemed it was this way with us, often. There were always misunderstandings-from the first time we met until the day he left.

"How's it possible, Edward, that two people can share such intense love but know each other so poorly? How could you _not_ have known all those months ago that leaving me would have destroyed who I was-that your rejection would crush what little self-worth I had to begin with? How could you _not_ know I would have lived a tortured existence if Charlie, or anyone else, had been killed because of me? I would have carried that guilt with me forever. How do you _not_ know these things about me?"

I needed an answer from him because the only one I could think of was that he didn't really love me. How could he, or anyone, truly love me as deeply as he professed without knowing me better? If it wasn't love, what was it? Was it an uncontrollable compulsion-an addiction like Jacob believed? Was it possible to actually _love_ your personal brand of heroine? I was desperate to hear an alternative. It was bad enough that he had left and left me broken; I didn't want it to be because of an illusion.

"I don't have the answers you seek, Bella. I can only guess that my special gift has dulled my ability to make inferences. I suppose I have become too dependent on it." Edward was defeated and resigned.

"How do you know what you feel for me is love? Can you separate your...addictive attraction from the emotion? Is that why you wouldn't change me? Was it because you weren't sure if you would feel the same for me once the lure of my scent was gone? What if you _had_ been able to read my mind all along? Would you have taken any interest in me?" I always wondered these things but never said them aloud for fear they might be true. From the beginning, it never seemed right that Edward was with me.

"You wouldn't have been you without those traits." He was evading my questions.

"You're wrong, Edward. I _would_ have still been me. My scent and my private thoughts don't define me. Those define what _you're_ able to do. Are you so self-absorbed that you see your abilities, and short-comings, as _my_ traits?"

"Bella, how do I convince you of my true and enduring love? Do you wish to be changed? Say the word and I shall do it right now. Do you want me to beg? Here, I will fall on my knees for you!" Edward bent down onto his knees, pleading with me. If he could cry, he would have drowned in his tears. "All I'm able to do is offer you promises. I promise to do anything. I have searched a century for you, and I will not give up. If Jacob should leave you-"

"Jacob would never leave me," I interjected. Edward smiled smugly and stood up.

"I think, Bella, I am not the only who keeps secrets from you. Jacob has not told you everything about the wolves. There are..._things_ that happen to them that are beyond their control. You should ask him about Leah, Sam and Emily." I was confused. What was Edward talking about? "I will be waiting for you, Bella, always. I won't care how old you are, what life you have lived, or what choices you have made. I'll be where you want me to be, and do whatever you want me to do, if you will take me."

What was I supposed to say to that? He was telling me he'd be my back up plan, no matter what. I felt guilty having a relationship safety net, but it wasn't like I asked for it. Still, it felt so _wrong_.

"Edward, Jacob will never leave me. And I don't want you to tell me those things. You shouldn't be waiting for me, 'just in case'. It's...it's...I don't know, just...wrong!" I threw my hands up in frustration. What could I do to explain this to him-and myself?

It was then that I heard a loud bang. The front door flew open, and Jacob stormed in. Seconds later, the rest of the Cullens appeared in the room.

"Jacob, this is our territory," Edward stated perfunctorily.

"I don't care. Just like I don't care that you saved Seth because he wouldn't have needed saving if I were there!" Jacob shouted. He glared at Edward with distain and hatred before he turned to me. "What are you doing here, Bella?" He didn't shout at me, but disappointment was apparent in voice.

I pushed my way past Edward and stood at Jacob's side. It was the only thing I could think of to reassure him.

"Charlie told me Edward called while we were away. I came to find out why, and you were right. He wanted me to leave," I answered. Jacob relaxed a bitl put his arm around my shoulders, and held me closely.

"Jacob, you shouldn't blame yourself. Everyone's fine, and there is no permanent damage to your pack."

"If you want to call Leah having more than ten broken bones and seeing her baby brother get his skull cracked by a vampire-all this after their father just died-'no permanent damage' then yeah, we're all peachy keen! And I don't want your damn sympathy! I can blame myself if I want to!" I looked at Jacob questioningly. "Leah took my patrol shifts, so I could go away," Jacob replied to my unspoken questions. "No one else wanted to take them, but she didn't mind because they were with Seth. Leah's fast but not as strong, and Seth is green. They aren't paired together for those reasons, but she was doing me a favor. It was _my_ fault they were in danger, and _his_ fault I wasn't here!"

Jacob glared and seethed while Edward stared back with a cold, blank expression.

"Don't worry, I won't be making any more decisions for Bella. In fact, I'll be leaving Forks as soon as we resolve things with the Volturi, and Bella and I have had our opportunity to straighten things out. Unless of course, she _asks_ me to stay."

"She won't be asking," Jacob hissed. "And we don't need your help."

"Jacob, you don't want to go up against the Volturi alone," Carlisle said as he stepped forward from behind Edward. "Even the seven of us wouldn't want to go up against them on our own. In fact, we're going to try to end this without a confrontation."

"We can take care of ourselves," Jacob answered with confidence. "I don't believe any of you about how dangerous they are. If they're so dangerous, how come you haven't told us anything about them or tried to work with us? Your little fortune teller was pretty cooperative about working with us to get Victoria a couple of months ago, but no one seems concerned about making plans for your supernatural police force. You haven't even told us when they're coming."

"That's because I'm not sure," Alice replied. "Victoria keeps changing her mind, but I promise to let you know once I find out."

"You're right, Jacob," Carlisle added. "We haven't shared what we know with you, but it's not because we don't take the Volturi seriously. As I've already stated, we were hoping to end this without a confrontation. However, we do need to plan in case things don't work out that way. We would like—and need—your help should a confrontation be unavoidable. We should have spoken earlier. I will be in contact with Sam to arrange a time to meet, perhaps in a couple of weeks? I think it would be best if you and Edward had some time to calm down first. In the meantime, I know your pack cannot go to a hospital. I would be happy to take a look at Seth and Leah's injuries if–"

"No!" Jacob hissed loudly. He took a deep breath and calmly added, "It won't be necessary. They're healing just fine. Sue, their mother, is a nurse, and she's looking after them."

"I understand, but if you should need assistance, I would be honored to help, in any way," Carlisle stated.

"Sure, sure," Jacob replied. He seemed taken aback by Carlisle's generosity but not entirely trusting. Jacob took my hand and turned to leave when Edward spoke.

"Bella, don't forget to ask Jacob."

Jacob stopped and glowered at Edward.

"Ask what?"

"Bella should know what you have been keeping from her," Edward replied. Jacob was silent. "She should know what you may do one day. You haven't told her everything about being one of the wolves." Edward stared accusingly at Jacob.

"That doesn't concern you, leech!"

"What concerns Bella, concerns me. It is inequitable for you to accept victory without laying out all your cards, Jacob."

"What is this, a contest?"

"It can only be a contest if both of us are willing participants," Edward replied.

"She's _mine_."

"For now, but she was mine not so long ago, and now look at where I stand."

"No matter what happens, I won't let her go. It's too late for that now." Jacob looked over at me. "I'm past the point of no return, Bells. I can't let you go."

"It would appear we have a situation where only one of us shall be victorious," Edward said calmly.

"Yeah? bring it on!"

"What are you two talking about? No one owns me, and I'm not going to be with anyone that hurts one of you!" I was annoyed. They spoke of me like a possession, not a person. Had they forgotten that it was my decision as to whom I wanted in my life? I wasn't a prize for either of them could win! Right now, dull, human Mike Newton didn't look like such a bad option.

Jacob and Edward ignored my comments, too focused on each other. I took Jacob's hand and tried to pull him towards the door. It was—of course—to no avail. His hand heated up in mine. It was hotter than ever before. Edward growled under his breath, never letting his eyes stray away from Jacob. I felt Jacob shake, and his body tensed. I knew he was doing everything he could to control himself, so he wouldn't phase right then and there.

In an instant, so blindingly fast and unexpected that I wasn't sure it had actually happened, Jacob ripped his hand out of my grasp and pushed Edward with his open palms. Edward was startled enough that he took a step backwards. His hand drew back in a fist, but Carlisle grabbed it before Edward could release his hit on Jacob.

"Edward, he is in human form, and Bella is standing next to him," Carlisle said in a soft tone.

"Huh." Jacob looked both perplexed and pleased.

Edward was seething and bewildered at the same time. Everyone else was confused too. They all stared at Edward, then at Jacob. Finally, Emmett broke the silence.

"What the hell just happened? No one _ever_ gets a hit on Edward. He's a cheat!" He turned to Jacob with genuine curiosity. "How'd you do that? I've been trying for decades!" Rosalie elbowed Emmett, silencing him.

"Don't think your little parlor tricks will work a second time, mongrel," Edward threw in.

"If it were a trick, you'd have seen it coming, but you didn't, did you?" Jacob smirked. "And you'll get a chance to find out if it works again, trust me." Jacob grabbed my hand and headed towards the door. "C'mon, Bells, I want to leave. The stench is killing me."

I paused and took one last look at the house. It was difficult to believe this once used to feel like home. Now, it was nothing but empty and lifeless. It was a cold void enveloped in silence. Nothing smelled alive. There was no food, no color, and no laughter. We left in silence, the door closing quietly behind us.

Once outside, I noticed my truck was the only car in the driveway. I looked over at Jacob and realized he was only wearing jean shorts. He must have phased and ran over. We got into the truck, and I let Jacob drive. Once we were on the main road, I decided we were far enough away that Edward couldn't hear Jacob's thoughts.

"Jacob, what just happened in there? Is Edward no longer able to read your thoughts? Are you like me, or is his power becoming useless with the wolves, like Alice's?" I asked.

Jacob was silent, as though contemplating how to answer.

"I'm pretty sure he can still read my thoughts," Jacob replied. I waited for more, but he remained silent.

"That's it? You're not going to tell me how you did that?" Jacob took a deep breath and exhaled loudly.

"It was an...animal thing, I think." Then he muttered something under his breath that I couldn't discern.

"What did you say?"

"Nothing, it's hard to explain. Let's talk about something else."

Something wasn't right. Jacob was purposely keeping this from me. Why would he do that? Did he think I was going to tell the Cullens about his 'parlor trick'? Didn't Jacob trust me? _Could_ I be trusted? I had, after all, told Jacob all about the Cullens and _their_ special abilities. I decided to let this one go, for now. I had other questions I needed answers to.

"Jacob, why did Edward tell me to ask you about Leah, Sam, and Emily?"

"That damn leech has no business poking around in my head. I've never lied to you. There's nothing I'd keep from you if I thought it made a damn difference." He hadn't answered my question.

"Jake, I want to know what Edward was talking about. What are you keeping from me?"

Jacob kept his gaze on the road ahead.

"It's really not a big deal. I wasn't intentionally keeping anything from you," he finally answered. "He's talking about imprinting. It's this weird wolf thing. The legends say it's really rare. Apparently, once in a while one of the Quileute wolves imprints on a girl. No one can control who it will be or who it will happen to. It happened to Sam with Emily. That's why he and Leah broke up. After he started phasing, Sam saw Emily and suddenly, his world revolved around her. From that moment on, nothing else mattered to him but Emily. She was all he wanted and the only reason he wanted to do anything or be anyone." By the time Jacob got to the end, his voice was almost a whisper. We were quiet for a minute, but eventually Jacob broke the silence. "It's not going to happen to me."

"You don't know that, do you, Jake?" I asked, unable to look at him.

"I know I love you more than anyone can love another person. It's _not_ going to happen to me," he said. He gripped the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles going white. I wasn't sure if he was trying to convince me or himself.

I understood now what Edward meant. I knew the reason why he was so sure of himself.

"Tell me Jacob; how did things work out with Leah and Sam?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"Sam and Leah were in love. Things were pretty serious, and they were going to get married. Then Sam started to phase. He was the first, and he didn't know what was happening. He was scared. He disappeared for a while and didn't see or talk to anyone. Leah went crazy. She was all worried, not knowing what happened. Finally, the elders caught up with Sam and helped him through it, but he still couldn't tell Leah about becoming a wolf. One day, Leah's cousin Emily came to visit, and Sam happened to be around. He took one look at Emily, and it was like he got hit by a freight train. Don't get me wrong, he hates himself for hurting Leah, but it was out of his hands." Jacob shrugged.

"So, everything Sam and Leah had got left by the wayside the minute he saw Emily? Nothing Sam and Leah had together—before that moment—mattered after he saw Emily?" My inquires were quiet, almost whispered.

"He still loves Leah, but yeah, something like that."

We drove the rest of the way in silence. Once we got to my house, Jacob walked me to the door, hugged me, and gave me a quick kiss.

"Bella, it's not going to happen to me, so stop thinking about it."

"You should have told me before. I should have known that you were going to abandon me one day before you asked me to make any promises! You said you'd never leave me, Jacob!" I didn't want to get upset, but I could feel the old wounds—that had almost healed—begin to ache.

"Bells, I'll never leave you. I told you, it's really rare. Even if it did happen to me—which it won't—nothing's going to make me leave you. Nothing."

"It wasn't fair to keep this from me, Jake. I had a right to know, and you know it! You don't know for sure what you'd do if it happened to you." Jacob was stricken and in pain. He held back tears.

"Bella, please don't tell me you're going to leave me because of this. It only exists because I'm a wolf, and I _hate_ being a wolf. You know that. You're my whole life now, Bells."

"I need to think." I kissed him gently before turning away.

"I'll always love you Bella, more than anyone. I'll never leave you." Jacob's voice was sad but full of sincerity. I heard him padding down the front walk, away from the house.

I held onto the door and turned to look out into the night. From my doorstep I saw Jacob walking into the woods, his hands in his pockets and his head hanging down. As I watched him walk away from me, I wondered if his parting words were true.

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><p><em>Chapter 8 - I Come In Peace is next. Things will really pick up with the action now. Thanks for sticking with the story, for all the reviews and story alertsfavorites. Of course, that doesn't mean I've had nearly my fill of them... I LOVE getting reviews! Just saying..._


	8. I Come In Peace

_Thank you to Someone aka Me and ChocolateMango from PTB for beta'ing this chapter!_

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><p><strong>Chapter 8 - I Come In Peace<strong>

About a week had passed since our encounter at the Cullen house, and it was the last Saturday of May. Jacob and I were walking to a bonfire on the beach in La Push with the whole pack, Emily, and Kim—a girl Jared had imprinted on recently. Originally, this event was planned for June because Sam and Emily were supposed to have guests (some of Emily's family, including her two year old niece), but they decided to postpone any visits until we had a clearer idea of when the Volturi would be arriving. The bonfire was moved up to tonight, since everyone had the time now.

I had just finished the last of my classes before finals, so this evening would have felt like a celebration except for the looming danger of the Volturi and the tension between Jacob and me.

We hadn't seen much of each other since our visit to the Cullen house. Jacob and I told each other we had to finish our final assignments and study for exams, but I was pretty sure that wasn't the real reason. Jacob was probably trying to give me some space so I could think, but he never let me forget his presence in my life. He came by to tune up the truck, left notes for me in my locker at school, and waited for me in the parking lot every morning to greet me. Once, I even found a bouquet of flowers left on my doorstep with a card from him.

While I was enamored by Jacob's efforts, it seemed he was always around, watching me. Possessiveness had taken root in him since that night at the Cullen house. It was apparent to me that he was afraid I would go back to Edward. Of course, I didn't exactly hide the fact that I was still upset about Jacob keeping the existence of imprinting from me. He looked at this—and my reaction to it—as a possible deal breaker. What he didn't know was that my anger was mixed with guilt.

I hadn't told him about Edward's "offer". Jacob probably assumed Edward would be waiting in the wings, but I was sure he had no idea exactly how long he'd be waiting, and that his acceptance of me would have no bounds.

Often, I wondered why I wasn't more upset about Jacob imprinting one day, but the answer came soon enough. Actually, too son. At first, I squashed the realization, preferring to live in denial rather than admit the horrible reason for my calm reaction. Eventually, I couldn't keep lying to myself. Imprinting didn't scare me away because Edward's promise gave me security. Sure, I'd be crushed if Jacob imprinted and left me, but knowing Edward would be there to pick up the pieces made it easier. Recognition of this made me so guilt ridden that I often felt I should leave everyone—my family, friends, and Jacob—to be with Edward. It wasn't fair to accept him because I had an insurance policy. But giving up my life to be with Edward wouldn't be right, either. I couldn't abandon Jacob and my family, crushing their lives, because I felt _guilty_.

That's not to say that I was _okay_ with imprinting, because I most certainly was not! The whole phenomenon loomed over me, becoming worse with the passage of time. It wasn't clear how rare it was, but having another Jared imprint was not promising. Worse than that was the knowledge that Jacob would want to fight it, if it happened to him; thus, prolonging and intensifying the suffering for us both once he left me in the end. It was because of this that I walked towards the Clearwaters as we approached the bonfire. I planned to observe Leah because she was the only victim of imprinting, thus far, and I wanted a chance to talk to her. The problem was, I had no idea how to broach the subject, or if it was even possible to get past my utter fear of her.

As we got closer, the light of the bonfire illuminated all that were present. I honed in on Leah immediately and noticed two other...boys? They were tall and gangly, but obviously not yet men. They looked even younger than Seth, who was finishing up Junior High.

I nudged Jacob. "Who are they?" I asked, jerking my head in the direction of the two boys.

"Oh, that's Collin and Brady. I wanted to tell you, but Sam wasn't ready to share with everyone yet. They needed a lot of TLC when they first phased because they're really young and there're two of them. That's why I've been so busy this past week. Sorry, I wanted to tell you."

"No, it's okay. I understand." I was sad for these boys but happy that Jacob's absence wasn't merely to avoid me. It made me feel better knowing it was pack obligation that kept him from me. "How old are they?" I asked, curious.

"Thirteen. They had a lot of trouble phasing back, which is why Sam wanted my help. It's sort of my niche, you might say. Anyhow, we had to get them calm and settled. It's kind of hard to explain away a thirteen year old boy's disappearance, and Collin's parents don't know about him."

"Why not? How is he supposed to hide this from them?" We got to the fire and settled down next to Leah and Seth. Jacob put his finger to his lips, jerking his head towards the group. Of course, werewolf hearing.

"We'll talk about it later," he said, before greeting the Clearwaters.

I sat next to Leah, smiled and said hello. She didn't answer. Instead, she looked me up and down and nodded. This wasn't a very good start to my plan. I examined her and realized how impossible it would be to get close to her.

To say she was intimidating was the understatement of the century. I had a few blurry memories of her from some of my childhood visits to Forks when Charlie tried to get me to play with his friends' children. Back then, she was a rough and tumble tomboy who always snickered at my clumsiness. She was still clever and beautiful, just like she was when we were children.

I noticed she never smiled and hardly talked. I hadn't seen her since the spaghetti dinner at Billy's earlier in the winter, and she had changed—physically—since then. She looked like she had grown a couple of inches, which was odd but not unheard of, for a girl her age. She was still strikingly beautiful but looked stronger and meaner. Leah was quite muscular now but in a lean and hungry way. She would have been absolutely menacing if it weren't for the fact that she had ample curves in all the right places. She reminded me of a female comic book heroine (or maybe the villainess) who is tough, beautiful, muscular, and yet still voluptuous. It was the kind of look most people thought could only be found in drawings, but apparently, it can be replicated in werewolf form.

Her brother Seth was just the opposite. He still had a very boyish face, but now he was much bigger, too. I was estimating that he was six feet tall, maybe a little more. He wasn't quite as muscle bound as the other pack members, but he was getting there. Even with his increased size, he still maintained a boyish innocence about him and exhibited impeccable manners.

And Seth idolized Jacob, always staying close and showing excitement over everything Jacob said. Seth was a sweet, good-natured boy always with a smile on his face, his enigmatic charm making everyone around him smile back. Seth reminded me of Jacob before he phased, and I enjoyed his company almost as much.

As hard as I tried, I couldn't find a way to talk to Leah. Every question I asked was answered with one-word responses. Some were completely ignored as she turned to speak to someone else. She made it clear, without coming right out and saying so, that she didn't like me. It didn't help my inferiority complex.

After another failed attempt at conversation with Leah, I gave up, looking for something else to do. I got up to get some food, but it was dark and the ground was uneven, and scattered with twigs and rocks. I tripped, heading in the direction of the fire, but Seth was there grabbed me before I fell.

"Are you okay, Bella?" Seth asked. Jacob reached for me, snatched my hand out of Seth's and pulled me towards him.

"She's fine," he answered for me. "I've got it, Seth," Seth looked at Jacob apologetically and shoved his hands in his pockets, looking down at his feet. This irritated me.

"Thank you, Seth. I'm fine thanks to you," I said to Seth, smiling as winningly as possible. I jerked my hand away from Jacob and glared at him.

"It's really dark here tonight, Bella. I can get you whatever you'd like. Were you going to get stuff to make s'mores?" Seth asked cheerily.

"I was, but you don't need to get it for me. I'll be okay."

"It's okay. I wanted to stretch my legs anyway. How much would you like?"

"Sit down, Seth. I'll get what you need, Bells," Jacob pushed Seth aside.

"Jake, Seth is capable of getting a few marshmallows," I snapped. Then, I turned to Seth. "Actually, I wouldn't mind if you _did_ get some things to make s'mores, after all. I'm not that coordinated in the dark." I heard Jacob snicker. He probably would have made some crack about how my deficiency wasn't isolated to being "in the dark" if I hadn't already snapped at him. "Why don't you bring enough for all of us to make them together, maybe make an assembly line? We'll put Jacob in charge of dismantling the hot marshmallows off the sticks. _His_ fingers are the only ones I'd like to see get burnt tonight."

Seeing my annoyance with him, Jacob tried to laugh it off by giving Seth a playful shove in the arm, commenting, "Hey buddy, stop crushing on my girl, okay? You may be cute, but she's not about to run away with you or anything."

"Hey, watch it, or I just _might_ run off with him. I _like_ Seth, you know." I gave Jacob a playful slap on the arm, feeling better now that he was more relaxed, and we could joke around like before.

I looked up and noticed Seth was still there. Even with only the dim light of the bonfire, and his dark complexion, it was clear he was blushing. It was cute, and I felt strangely close to him knowing he could be easily embarrassed just like me. Once he walked walked away I elbowed Jacob and whispered, "Leave him alone. He's a sweet kid, and you're embarrassing him."

"What? I was joking. I can't help it if he blushes like a girl," Jacob grumbled back.

I was going to retort, but suddenly, every member of the pack stood up, alert. Seth ran back to us, and Leah stepped protectively in front of her younger brother. I had no idea what was going on. Everyone was looking in one direction, towards the water. I looked and saw something white glimmering in the distance. It looked like a flag was waving at us. It was a short distance out to sea and coming closer at a very fast rate. Just then, I saw a head pop out of the water, and it shouted, "Bella, it's Alice. Can you tell them I come in peace?"

The pack looked ready to pounce, so I immediately yelled, "She's not here to hurt anyone. She's probably delivering a message." I poked Jacob in the ribs. "Jake, tell them."

Jacob crossed his arms in front of him and rolled his eyes. At least he wasn't tense like the rest of them. "It's the little psychic, and she's harmless. Her 'super-power' doesn't work with us, and without it, she's just small and weak." I wasn't too happy about Jacob making that last point, but at least his words seemed to calm everyone down. They no longer looked like they were ready to phase, but no one was sitting, either.

Alice zoomed up on shore in no time. I'd never seen her wet like this, but she still looked stylish. She had on an old-fashioned 1940's pin-up girl bathing suit with matching cap. She took off her cap, and her hair fluffed out perfectly. She unhitched a small plastic freezer bag from her belt and out flowed a silk robe, which she quickly put on.

I went to hug her. All eyes were on me, but I loved Alice and knew she had taken a big risk to come here. I also knew she wouldn't have done it if it weren't a matter of life or death. "Alice, what is it?"

"Bella, Jacob...everyone, I tried calling but no one was in. Charlie told me you'd probably be here with...them. The rest didn't want me to come, but someone _had_ to tell you, and I thought I'd be the least...threatening, under the circumstances. I've had a vision. Victoria's going to Italy tomorrow, to meet with the Volturi. She's going to tell them about Bella. They won't stand for a human knowing about us." She turned to me. "They're going to be coming after you, Bella."

Jacob held me closer. "How many are there, and when are they coming?"

"They'll be here Tuesday. So far, I see six coming, plus Victoria and Riley," Alice answered.

"What, only eight? We won't even need your help. It'll be a walk in the park," Jacob said with confidence.

"You don't understand, Jacob," Alice continued. "They aren't like the drifters you and the pack have encountered up until now. They're organized, and they have a 'collection' of vampires with special abilities that make me and Edward look like circus sideshows. And Victoria told them about the existence of the pack and that we're working together. It was because of that night when Edward intervened to save Seth."

"If you think they're such sure bets at beating all of us, why don't we stop phasing while they're here, go into hiding, and fake Bella's death? We could even make Charlie believe it, for a short while, if necessary." I knew Jacob was trying to keep me safe, but picturing Charlie finding out I died made me want to...well, die.

"No, that won't be enough. Aro, the leader, can read every thought a person has ever had by touching them once. There's no way to lie to him."

"Then we fight!" Paul exclaimed.

"We'll lose," Alice answered without hesitation. "We won't just lose; the battle will be over before any of us get a chance to touch them. There's a little one, Alec, who with one thought, can anesthetize all of us at once, completely paralysing everyone."

"Maybe his powers won't work on us, like yours." Seth sounded hopeful.

Alice shook her head. "I doubt it. Alec's powers work a lot like Edward's, and Edward has no problems reading your minds. But, we _do_ have a plan. It's a long shot, and I can't see if it'll work because all of you will be involved, if you agree."

Jacob stepped forward. "I'm not letting Bella get hurt—what's the plan?"

"Carlisle's on his way right now to Italy. They know Carlisle from before and will be happy to hear him out. He's going to try to get them to change their minds. It's probably not going to work, but I can't hear the whole conversation when I look for the outcome because Carlisle's still thinking about what he'll say. So far, he's going to point out that Bella knows about the wolves too, and she is the...mate...of one of them, making her part of the super natural world. He'll also be asking them to leave the pack alone to preserve our decades old treaty which has helped us remain inconspicuous. Besides, you have as many reasons to keep your existence a secret as we do ours. Unfortunately, I don't think it'll stop them from coming, so the rest of us are staying here to defend Forks and La Push. I'm assuming you'll join us." Sam and the rest of the pack nodded in agreement.

"What can you tell us about them? We want to know everything you know," Sam asked, as he stepped forward next to Jacob.

"I see who's coming, at least so far," replied Alice. "Aro will arrive here with Renata—his personal shield, their tracker Demetri, Felix—a giant henchman, and two very deadly, talented vampires, Alec and his twin sister Jane, along with Victoria and Riley. I don't think they're looking for a battle or more of the guard would be come with them, but Jane and Alec are formidable, so I can't be sure. Jane can cause anyone to fall in sheer agony with one thought. She manipulates her enemy's mind to believe they are in the worst pain imaginable, but she can only target one person at a time. We'll work out a strategy together in case of a confrontation."

Then Alice turned to address me. "Bella, you need to run. You need to get out of here as fast as you can and go as far as you can. You can't tell anyone where you're going, and you have to stay away for a long time. You have to try to stay in sunlight, among crowds, as much as possible. As much as Aro may want to destroy the wolves, it would be hard to destroy the entire tribe without attracting attention." Sam raised an eyebrow questioningly at Alice. She replied to his unvoiced inquiry, "The only way to completely eliminate the wolves forever would be to wipe out anyone who carries even a hint of the gene. That's almost the entire tribe, isn't it?" Alice asked. Sam nodded. "So, there's a good chance he might leave the wolves alone. He'll probably be more interested in negotiating with you than having to deal with that sort of mess." She turned her attention back to me. "But he has no reason to leave Bella alive. He may kill her on sight, without hesitation or thought." Alice stared at Jacob now. "Bella has to go alone, Jacob."

Jacob nearly lunged at Alice and—with his face an inch from hers—shouted, "No! I go where she goes! None of you have to do anything, but I'm not leaving her!" He turned to Sam. "No one's making me leave her!"

Alice didn't look fazed having Jacob so near. She looked...apologetic.

"Jacob, it's her only chance," she said regretfully. "Demetri's a tracker like no other, but he doesn't rely on heightened senses like James did. He has a special talent that makes him detect the presence of another and follows their mind. There's a good chance his abilities won't work on Bella because they work like Edward's, and her mind is the only one he can't hear. You, on the other hand...well..." Alice wrinkled her nose. "Jacob, even _I_ could track you. Besides, once Aro arrives, he'll find out that you're her...mate, and if you're missing, they'll know something's up."

Jacob's face crumpled. Completely defeated, he fell to his knees, still holding onto hand. "No, no, no. How can I do this? How can I send you away, on your own?"

For the first time, Jacob looked weak to me. It was difficult for me to look at him, on the ground, hanging onto my hands as if it they were the only things keeping him from falling apart. I looked around at the pack—all of them were so young. Not a single one had had a chance to live their lives yet. No one was married, had children, a career, or gone to college. The two newest members probably never kissed a girl. They would all be risking their lives for me. I was the only thing in the way of keeping them safe.

I reached down and ran my fingers through Jacob's hair. "Jake, it's okay. You're not sending me away. I'm leaving to protect all of you, and to keep myself alive. I'll be fine—I promise. We'll be together again, soon." After a short silence—I did my best not to cry, for Jacob's sake—I turned to Alice. "Okay, I'm ready to leave. What do I do, just pack and go?" I asked, but in my mind the decision was already made. I wasn't going to run away in what I knew would be a futile attempt to evade the Volturi. I wouldn't let all these people die because of me. One life was not worth all theirs, especially mine.

"Forget it, Bella. You know my family, and I won't let you do that. I'm sure Jacob won't either." Darn. How was I supposed to get past her? Jacob got up, looked at Alice questioningly, then at me. I avoided his gaze and offered no explanation. Alice told him, the traitor that she was. "She was going to sacrifice herself in hopes of making the Volturi go away."

Immediately, Jacob grabbed me with both hands and shook me until I looked up at him. "What are you thinking? You think that's going to solve anything? If that happened, I would die too! So would Charlie and Edward! You wouldn't just be sacrificing yourself!" I was shocked to hear Jacob mention Edward that way. He hated him, yet he saw how much Edward loved me and wasn't afraid to say it out loud.

"Jake, it's not fair for all of you risk your lives for me. You heard Alice. They'll leave the pack alone, but they won't let me get away. _I'm_ the only problem here. If it were you, would _you_ run away and let everyone else take all the risks, for you?"

Jake ignored my pleas, speaking to Alice instead. "There's got to be another option—tell me there's a plan B."

"There is, but you won't agree to it, not that it's _your_ decision."

"There's nothing I wouldn't do, if it kept Bella safe."

Alice looked smug. "Oh, really? Well plan B, the way to get the Volturi off Bella's back for good, would be to change her into one of...well...to become like me."

I heard everyone, except Alice and Jacob, take in a sharp breath, and there were gasps all around.

Jacob looked at Alice with rage in his eyes, but he said nothing. Alice looked right back, challenging him. There was a moment of intense silence. I realized people were waiting for me to say something. Becoming a vampire was something I had wanted so much not so long ago. I had nearly begged for, but all of it was to be with Edward, forever. During a brief moment, I was tempted to say yes. It would mean the end of all this. Alice had said Aro could be convinced to leave the wolves alone. I was the bigger problem.

Jacob saw my hesitation, and burned through me with his eyes. He was torn. He wanted me safe, but he wanted me human, too. He knew if I were changed, I would end up with Edward, and he would lose me forever. I would be dead to him. If I remained human, I would be on my own, vulnerable and targeted. No matter what I did, it seemed it would likely end in him losing me.

"Bella," he whispered. He opened his mouth to say more, but no words escaped. His eyes welled up with moisture and his lip trembled. He tried again to speak. "I'm sorry, for everything."

I reached up and touched the palm of my hand to his face. "Don't be sorry. I know you love me, and you know I love you, too."

"Please, Bella."

It would be easier for almost everyone—in a lot of ways—if I was changed, but it wasn't right. I wanted Jacob. I wanted to give _us_ a chance. If I decided otherwise at some point, it had to be because I wanted it more than anything else, not because of the Volturi. Looking at Jacob's pleading eyes, I knew becoming a vampire would be worse than sending him to his death.

"No, Alice. The answer is no...sorry."

"That's okay, Bella. I was pretty sure that would be your decision." She let out a sigh before getting down to business. "You have to go now. The bigger your head start, the better. Go home first and pack your passport—just in case—but remember, if you use it, they can trace what country you've gone to. I left a large—but easy to carry—backpack for you. It's partially filled with cash, but there's space for a few clothes and shoes. Don't use bank cards, credit cards or anything else that's traceable. Don't call anyone, write anyone, or even check your email. We're not sure how long you'll have to run, but you have to keep moving. Do things impulsively and plan as little as possible, so I won't see you. Don't stay in one place for too long, and whatever you do, guard that money! Keep some in every pocket of everything you wear. We'll find you when things are safe."

Jacob glared at Alice after her last sentence. "Yes, Bella. We'll find you. _All_ of us will, won't we, Alice?" Alice didn't answer right away. Eventually, she silently nodded.

I wanted to stay and face my enemies. It was the only solution I saw, but Jacob would never allow it. I turned to Sam instead. I knew the welfare of the pack would come first with him.

"Sam, make Jacob stop this. You know what the best thing to do is here. I'm only one person and there are ten of you. I'm even older than most of them." I waved with my hand toward the group of teenage boys surrounding him.

"Don't do it Sam!" Jacob shouted. "Don't make me do something that'll change everything. You know there can only be one, and _this_ is not the right time for that fight." Sam looked at Jacob, opened his mouth to say something, then closed it. Why wasn't Sam saying anything, and what was Jacob talking about? What did he mean by "there can only be one"? It sounded like some cheesy line out of a movie. I decided to try again.

"Sam, if you stop Jacob and support me, the Cullens can't prevent me from being there." Jacob grabbed me and turned my body so I was forced to face tried to speak, but I put a hand to his mouth and kept talking to Sam. "I'm not part of their family. If I'm willing to stand my ground, that should be my choice."

Finally, Sam spoke.

"Bella, I can't make Jacob do anything." What did he mean by that? He was the Alpha. I'd seen how his orders worked before. "And having you sacrifice your life might make things better, or it might not. Alice said the Volturi might leave the pack alone, but it doesn't sound like that's a sure thing." Alice nodded, confirming Sam's point. "Giving up a human they want so easily might make them think they can do anything they want with us."

I looked at everyone, conflicted about what I should do. That's when I heard a female voice. It was Leah.

"Go already. The faster you leave, the sooner we can start strategizing. Stop being such a damn martyr because we're never going to give you all the credit for getting rid of these high-falutin' assholes. It's better for us to wipe them out while we have a chance, than to wait around until they come back later when we won't have the talking crystal ball here to warn us." Jacob looked over at Leah, gratefully. She turned away from Jacob's gratitude and took a step back from the group.

"Please, Bella, just go. If I can let you go all by yourself like this, then you have to be strong enough to leave." I couldn't fight Jake anymore, not when everyone was standing by him. I had no allies in this. I begrudgingly nodded my assent, and Jacob embraced me.

When we broke from our hold, he rifled through his pocket and put something into my hand. They were the keys to the Rabbit. "You can't take your truck—take my car."

"No!" Alice exclaimed. "She can't take anyone's car, not her own either. We can't have Charlie finding you, and we can't know anything. Not even how you're travelling. The more we know, the more Aro will find out. When he gets here, he'll touch Edward and me. He'll have learned about all of us from Carlisle. He'll look for Jacob, too and touch him as well. Aro will know everything." Then she looked directly at Jacob. "He can read every thought you have ever had up until the moment he touches you, so don't do anything from this moment on that you don't want him to know."

Tears streamed down my cheeks. I felt so alone. I didn't mind running. I didn't mind doing what I could to ensure those I loved would be safe, but after hearing this, I didn't know what to do, where to go, or how to get there. Not succeeding would ruin everything. Jacob would be devastated, and there would be no peaceful end to the visit from the Volturi. I knew Jacob and the Cullens would stop at nothing to protect me, even if it meant the death of them all. Charlie would die inside, if I died. Renee would lose that inner happiness she had with her at all times. I had to stay alive or they would all die, in one way or another.

I stood, frozen and stunned. Jacob woke me from my petrified haze. "Bella, you _have_ to keep yourself safe. I can't go on without you. I can wait as long as I need to...to see you again, but I _need_ to see you again."

I was crying. "Jake, I'll be back, I promise. I won't do anything stupid, and I'll be careful. You be careful, too. You have to be here when I come back."

We kissed. It was heart-wrenching, desperate, a mixture of love and sorrow. We parted slowly, our hands clasped as I walked backwards. Slowly, our fingers stretched away and were no longer joined. I turned my back to him before I lost the nerve and ran as fast as I could.

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><p><em>Next up is Chapter 9 - Goodbye<em>

_Yes, that's right. Believe it or not, there's still more to be said and done before Bella finally leaves Forks. Don't worry, it won't be a chapter full of angst-y whining and repeated episodes of tearful farewells (well, not completely). Bella has to deal with Charlie - which will be interesting (or at least I hope you find it interesting), and there is another development... _

_Lastly, I'd love to hear from some more of those visitors I see in my stats. A review left is a review appreciated._


	9. Goodbye

_I promise, Bella is really going to leave. No more Jacob/Bella angst for quite a while to come (after this chapter, of course), but...not so much Jacob either (don't shoot projectiles at me, please!). The good news is the adventure is going to start now! _

_Enjoy!_

_Oh yes, and a very special thanks to SqueakyZorro and Love of Escapism from PTB who beta'ed this chapter for me. I can't believe there are people out there willing to beta fics for nothing...not even peanuts!_

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><p><strong>Chapter 9 - Goodbye<strong>

I cried all the way home, which I decided was a big mistake the second I walked into the house. Charlie heard me come in and greeted me at the door, as always. He took one look at my puffy eyes and tear stained face and began the interrogation.

"Bella, what happened? I thought you were out with Jacob. Did _he_ do this to you? Did he try to do something you didn't want to do?"

"Dad, I'm all right." What was I going to tell him? I couldn't do the, "I need to leave Forks so I don't end up like mom" thing to him again. "Jacob did nothing wrong. I just want to be alone."

"It was Edward, wasn't it? Did he come to see you because you didn't call him back? What did he want?" Charlie wasn't going to let this go. I must have looked really bad because he was holding me, preventing me from leaving. Even if I did leave, I knew he'd follow. "Bells, you have to talk to me. Don't do this again; don't lock yourself away in that shell. What happened? I promise I won't get mad at you, no matter what you tell me."

What was I going to say? How was I going to get out of here without him coming after me? Why didn't I think of something on the way home? Well, I knew the answer to that. I was too busy wallowing in my own misery to think about what to tell Charlie. Fortunately, my face was a wreck, and my voice was cracking, so maybe it wouldn't be as easy to detect my horrible poker face. I had to think fast.

This was going to be really bad, and really ugly, but for some reason it was all I could come up with. I tried to give as little detail as possible in an attempt to spare him some pain and to spare me from the outrageous lies bubbling to the surface. "I'll tell you Dad, but you have to promise me you'll drop it after I tell you. I don't want to talk about it, and I want to be alone. After I tell you, I'm going to go upstairs, lock the door, and sleep for as long as I can. I want you to promise me you'll drop it, at least until tomorrow."

"Okay Bella, I promise."

"You're right, I did see Edward. He came to talk to me...when Jacob was there. They got into a fight, then Jake and I...we got into a bad argument and...we broke up." I blurted it all out as fast as I could, hiccupping and sobbing the whole time.

It wasn't enough for Charlie. "Did anyone get hurt? Why did you and Jacob break up? Are you getting back together with that Cullen boy? Bells, tell me you're not..."

"Dad, no...I mean not exactly..." It was getting hard. The story that had surfaced was still there, but I was trying to keep it from bursting. I was so stressed and desperate that tears streamed down my face. I heard my sobs getting louder. My voice began to stutter. Fortunately for me, this made anything I said sound more convincing. I took a deep breath. _Oh well_, I thought, _Charlie already hated Edward anyway_... "I'm... I'm... Dad, I'm...pregnant."

"WHAT?" he shouted, as his grip on my arm tightened.

"You said you'd drop it if I told you!"

"What does this have to do with Edward?"

"It's his!"

"WHAT?"

My head was spinning, I thought I was going to hyperventilate. All I wanted to do was drop to the floor, but then I would never get away. I tried to gather my thoughts and sort out the details as quickly as I could. It spilled out of me in one rapid stream of words.

"A while ago, I met up with Edward to talk. I cheated on Jake with him. Later, I found out I was pregnant. I told Edward the other day, and he...offered me money...to take care of it. Then, he came today to apologize...for offering me money. Jake wouldn't let him talk to me. Edward got angry and told Jake I was pregnant, by him. They got into a fight, but I...made them stop. Jake...broke up with me and...here I am. Now, you promised me, so I don't want to hear it right now. I don't want to talk about it, or call mom, so don't even suggest it. I'm going upstairs to sleep. You can do anything you'd like to me tomorrow. You can lock me up in an interrogation room until I'm forty if you want, but tonight I don't want to talk to anyone, see anyone, or even be awake!"

Charlie was completely dumbfounded. His face was so red I thought he'd explode. He was frozen, and his eyes looked like they were going to pop out of his head. His hold on me loosened, and I took this moment of shock to run upstairs, lock my door, and begin packing.

About five minutes passed before I heard Charlie's footsteps upstairs. I heard him pause at my door for a moment before he knocked. I didn't answer, but he spoke anyway. "Bells, I know I promised, and you don't have to say anything. I'm just going to say one thing, and then I'll leave you alone until tomorrow. I need to think, too. I want you to know that I love you. No matter what you've done, I'll always love you. Just because I don't like your... _decisions_ doesn't change that. I'm going to do everything I can to make things as good as they can be for you, but I don't want you to hide things from me. No matter what, your old man is always going to be on your side." I heard a sniffle. I had made my father cry. Then, I heard footsteps as Charlie went back downstairs.

I sat on my bed and tried to calm down. All was quiet downstairs for the first few minutes, but that was broken by some clicking and banging. The gun cabinet! What was Charlie…? A few more minutes passed, and I heard the front door slam shut and the cruiser leave the driveway. Charlie was probably going to the Cullen house, to confront Edward. I picked up the phone and starting dialling. He answered his cell phone on the first ring.

"Bella, you shouldn't be calling me." Edward sounded preoccupied.

I spoke quickly, barely stopping to take a breath. "Look, Charlie wanted to know why I was upset. He just left, probably to see you. I was put on the spot, so I told him I cheated on Jacob with you a while ago. You got me pregnant, offered me money for an abortion, came today to apologize to me, Jake got mad at you, you told Jake about us, you and him got into a fight, I sort of stopped the two of you, then Jake broke up with me. I don't want to talk about it—it's all I could come up with."

I heard a muffled chuckle on the other end. What a time to laugh!

"Did Charlie believe all that? You must be a much better liar than I ever gave you credit for."

"Look, I told you I didn't want to talk about it. I've been crying, and I was blubbering while I was talking. I probably could have told him his deputy got me pregnant, and he would've believed me. I have to go."

I hung up before Edward could say anything else. I had one more call to make.

Jacob wasn't as easy to track down. He wasn't at home, and I had to make Billy call around and have someone find him. I was too anxious to pack, so I paced back and forth waiting for Jacob to call back. It seemed an eternity, but finally, I heard steps climbing my stairs. I opened my door, and Jacob stood smiling at me.

"Jake, you're here! How did you know Charlie wasn't home?"

"Oh, um, I didn't hear him or...smell him. I got your message. I knew if you called it had to be important, so I came to see you, just in case."

"Oh, Jake." I buried my head in his chest, tears falling onto his shirt.

"It'll be okay, Bells. I'll make it okay. You'll see," he whispered into my hair.

My hands roamed his body, absorbing the warmth emanating from it, knowing I wouldn't feel it again for a long time. I ran my fingers up and down his arm and around his shoulders. That's when I felt something strange. It was bumpy, and when I poked it to investigate, I felt Jacob flinch. I pushed him gently to turn him around and saw a wound on his back, just below his shoulder. There was dried blood, but the wound had closed and was on its way to healing. What I felt was a bumpy red scar that I assumed would eventually heal. It was swollen and hot, much warmer than the rest of his body. Redness and swelling spread from the bumpy area all along his shoulder and arm, like a giant bee sting. His complexion was off too. It was pale and he appeared drained of energy. It filled me with worry.

"Jake, what happened to you?"

He shrugged nonchalantly.

"Hmm, nothing. I guess I wasn't thinking straight when I came over here. I...ah...flipped on the motorcycle and hit something sharp." That didn't sound right. It accounted for the scar but didn't explain all the other symptoms. Besides, Jacob's reflexes were pretty much in league with superheroes. What could have been on the road to produce a small, clean, but deep cut like that? In fact, the more I looked at it, the more familiar the scar looked. It was hard to tell where I'd seen it before because it was so misshapen and inflamed. It almost looked like it was throbbing.

I noticed Jacob was perspiring.

"Jake, you're sweating and you don't look well. Are you sick? I thought wolves didn't get sick." I put my hand on his face. It was burning, almost as hot as the scar. I pulled my hand away reflexively, shocked by the heat.

"I'm fine. Just need some fluids. Can I go get some juice?" I nodded and he raced downstairs, returning with a full glass of orange juice in his hands. He gulped it down in seconds.

"See? I feel better already. Don't worry about me—I've got mystical werewolf healing powers." Jacob smiled and patted his fists onto his chest like King Kong. It made me giggle. "You can't spend your time or energy thinking about me. If it'll make you feel better, I'll go see Dr. Fang when he returns. You trust him, right?" I nodded. "Okay, end of this discussion." Jake's demeanor became softer, then he asked in a quiet voice, "What was it you needed to tell me, Bella?"

"I guess it's good that Carlisle isn't home. It's not a good time to go there right now." Jacob raised his eyebrow questioningly. I hadn't realized I had said it out loud. I sighed before offering more. "They've got a visitor."

"You called me to tell me the Cullens have a visitor?"

"Jacob, I forgot to think of a story for Charlie until I got home. He saw my face, and it looked horrible." I was crying again, and most of it came out between sob-filled hiccups. "He started interrogating me the minute I walked in. Please, don't hate me, but you know how bad I am at lying, and I couldn't come up with anything else. I don't know why this is what I came up with, but it was, so don't make it into anything it's not. I was hysterical and in tears while I was thinking this stuff up."

"Bella, calm down. It's okay—just tell me."

"I told him Edward came to the beach to talk to me, and the two of you got into a fight."

"Yeah, who won?" Jacob asked, smirking. I was annoyed. This was no time for joking around. I continued, ignoring his comment.

"The two of you got into a fight because you wouldn't let Edward speak to me alone, so he blurted out that I was pregnant with his child."

"Couldn't I, at least, have been the one that got you knocked up?" Jacob didn't look angry. He barely seemed surprised.

"Jake, this isn't a joke! Charlie's probably knocking down Edward's door right now with rifle in hand. I heard him get it."

That brought a smile to Jacob's face. "Wish I knew that before. I would've stopped over there first, to watch the fireworks."

I looked sternly at Jacob and continued. "Anyhow, you guys fought, I broke it up, then you broke up with me."

"Okay, fine, but can I at be the winner of the fight?"

"Jake!" I wrapped my arms around him and held on. Jacob reached down and stroked my hair. Then, he lifted my chin up. He wasn't joking anymore. His eyes bore into me with intense desperation.

"Bella, I love you more than...well, more than I know how to tell you. Please, be careful. Take care of yourself. You know I want nothing more than to go with you, and _not_ going is the hardest thing I've ever done, so you _have_ to keep yourself safe. I brought your motorcycle. I didn't have the heart to sell it, so I lied to Billy about it months ago. I know Alice said you couldn't take any of our cars, but Charlie won't know to look for this since he's never seen it before. I figure you have a few days before you have to ditch it, and that'll be long enough for you to get far enough away so Charlie won't find you. I'm thinking you're not going to get far on foot, and if you take your car to the bus station or something Charlie will find out where you went before morning."

"Thanks, Jake, I hadn't even thought that far ahead. You just worry about yourself. Keep your temper in check, and don't take any risks you don't need to. You have nothing to prove. Just keep yourself alive, for me. Do you hear me?"

Jacob rested his forehead on mine and whispered, "I hear you."

"Goodbye, Jake. And promise me you'll see Carlisle as soon as he gets back?" He rolled his eyes at my request but smiled.

"I promise. Go, Bella. Run fast and run far, but come back to me"

I nodded.

He lowered his lips to meet mine and our lips searched desperately for refuge from the anguish. We kissed and searched, as tears flowed down my face. No matter how closely we held each other or how firmly our lips moved together, it wasn't enough. Nothing made saying goodbye feel right.

We finally parted, and Jacob's hand lingered on my face before he turned and jumped out my window.

I had told everyone I needed to tell the story to, and Charlie would be yelling and screaming for some time over at the Cullen place. Now was a good time to make my getaway.

I made sure to dress warmly, in layers. The night air would be cold while riding the motorcycle. I had never ridden it at night and hoped I would survive the first leg of my journey.

The backpack Alice had given me was roomy, and there was a _lot_ of money in it. The only place I had seen this much money was in the movies. Only a few clothes, an extra pair of sneakers, my wallet, and my toiletry bag fit into what little extra space there was. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to carry it because the money was quite heavy, but the backpack was well designed. Once I put it on, the weight was distributed perfectly. I remembered what Alice had instructed me to do and took a few bundles of cash out. I did the best I could to put some into various pockets in my jeans, the inside pockets of my jacket, in my bra, and a few bills in each of my socks.

At the last minute, I decided to leave a note for Charlie to buy myself extra time. I was going to assume he would honor my wishes and stay out of my room until morning. I took out a piece of paper and wrote:

_Dad, I got up early and called Jake. He came to pick me up, and I didn't want to wake you. I'm with him now. I'll call you later. Don't worry, you can ground me or whatever when I get back, but I know you'll understand when I tell you that Jacob and I really have a lot to talk about._

_I love you Dad, and I know you'll always be there for me._

_Bella_

I put it on my bed, closed my bedroom door behind me, and carefully walked down the stairs. Once I was outside, I found the motorcycle parked at the side of the house, almost in the backyard. It was well hidden from the street. There was a note tied to the handlebar. I opened it up. It was from Jacob.

Written were brief instructions on how to turn on the head lights, fill it with gas, minor maintenance tips, and pointers on driving at night. It was mostly informative and perfunctory, but was signed _with all the love I have, your Jacob_. I folded it up and put it in my pocket. He was always talking care of me, even when he wasn't here.

I had my helmet on and was about to start the engine when I heard someone calling from the trees.

"Bella!" It was a loud whisper. I tried to look to see who it was, but it was too dark. The voice sounded familiar, but I couldn't quite identify it. I got off the bike and started walking towards it. I was almost at the edge of the forest that our property backed onto when the figure of a man walked towards me. I looked closer. It wasn't a man. It was a large teenage boy.

"Seth, what are _you_ doing here?"

"I'm here to run away with you."

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><p><em>Chapter 10 - New Protector (I guess we all know who that is now...) is next. It's a long chapter with a lot of Seth. I hope all of you like him (really, what's not to like?).<em>

_Thanks to all those who have left a review, or added me to their favorites/alerts. It lets me know there are people out there enjoying my efforts. I appreciate all reviews!_


	10. New Protector

_Chapter ten is a long one that went through more than one revision. I hope you enjoy it. A lot happens in this one._

_Thank you to all the PTB betas - ModSweedishBubble, ChocolateMango and tiffanyanne3 - involved in helping me with this chapter! It just wouldn't have been the same without you!_

_**A line has been used in this chapter that is a direct quote from Chapter 11 of Breaking Dawn by Stephenie Meyer.**_

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><p><strong>Chapter 10 - New Protector<strong>

Seth suggested he drive. I told him it wasn't the best idea because he was underage, didn't have a license, and it was _my_ bike. I thought that would be the end of the argument when he agreed we definitely didn't want to get pulled over, but I was wrong. He noted that some big guy sitting behind a little girl, hanging onto her, would attract more attention than if I were hanging onto him. He also pointed out that while he may be underage, he certainly didn't look it and likely looked older than me, which I had to concede could be true. The last one took me by surprise. Seth told me he knew I didn't have a motorcycle endorsement on my license, so it wasn't like I would be riding around legally, either. Apparently, he knew this because—like the rest of the pack—he knew Charlie disapproved of motorcycles, and in Forks there was no way I'd be able to take the endorsement test without my father finding out. I had to hand it to him; he made a good argument. I wasn't exactly thrilled about driving at night anyway, so I gave the keys to him. Personally, I thought he was simply too embarrassed to ride on the back, but I decided not to mention it.

Seth wouldn't explain anything to me until we were out of town, so we rode for what seemed like a couple of hours, then stopped by the side of the road. He pushed the bike out of view, and we sat inside the treed area.

"Okay, Seth, now are you going to tell me what's going on? Did Jacob make you come?" I asked.

"No one knows I'm with you. I had to run all the way to Forks without phasing because I was afraid they'd hear my thoughts. You have no idea how slow it felt to me," he replied, rolling his eyes when he said the last bit.

"If no one sent you, then why are you here? Everyone's going to be worried, and you've put yourself in danger by being with me!" I left Jacob to keep everyone safe, and I was still thinking about what I could do to get the Volturi to take just me and leave everyone else alone. The last thing I needed was to have Seth's life in my hands, too.

"Bella, I had to do this because I knew it wouldn't work out unless I did."

"They're going to notice you're missing and come looking for you. You're messing all of this up!" I was overwhelmed with frustration. "SETH! What do you think you're DOING? GO HOME!"* I shouted. Seth's only reply was a sigh.

"Listen, if you think everything I say doesn't make sense, then I'll go back." I nodded. "The way I see it, if you run away on your own, they'd find you. Don't get me wrong, I know you're smart, but you're just a girl and they're...well, they're super-vampires. Even without that tracker guy's ability, you'd be found in a day or two. _I'd_ probably find you in a day or two." I knew he was right, but I couldn't help feeling a little slighted by his last remark.

"Gee, thanks for your vote of confidence," I mumbled, trying to make light of the dismal situation.

"I didn't mean it that way," Seth replied, smiling but not cocky.

"Yeah, I'll take your word for it, continue."

"For one thing, having me around means Alice won't be able to see you for sure." I was surprised he remembered her name. Jacob never bothered trying. He seemed to refer to all of them as "leech", or some other derogatory term. "But that's just a bonus, not the main part of the plan." It may not have been the main part of _his_ plan, but it got me thinking about mine. This would mean I could do what I wanted, and Alice wouldn't be able to stop me. I was starting to warm up to Seth's scheme already.

"You can't just take off. They'll never stop looking for you, which means you'll be found sooner or later. The only way to make them stop is if they think you're dead. And the only way they'll believe that is if _everyone_ thinks you're dead. It has to be convincing. There have to be no questions about it, and we have to do it without there being a body." His face beamed with a huge grin as he rubbed his hands together in anticipation. "I have an idea, but you can't do it alone. Jake would be able to do it, well, maybe Sam, too, but he's Alpha so he can't... Whatever, at least that's what I think. Alice said Jake has to stay in Forks because if he's gone they'll know something's up. Me, on the other hand, I'm a nobody. I'm so green no one even expects me to be there for the fight. I wasn't sure, so I tried today and it worked!" Seth was animated but getting off topic, and I was confused.

"Okay, I'm on the edge of my seat. I want to hear about your self-discovery, and your plan, but first things first. How is no one going to miss you for the next...who knows how long?" I asked.

Seth smiled sheepishly. "Sam told me to go home. He tried to make it sound less lame by saying I was the 'general' in charge of 'homeland security,' but we already know where the super-vamps are going to be, and none of them are going to be near La Push. Basically, I'd be babysitting Collin and Brady." His eyes rolled so far back I thought they would disappear altogether. "Usually, I argue and whine about stuff like that, but this time I showed my disappointment and left with Collin and Brady. At home, I told mom Sam had put me in charge of patrolling La Push, and she might not see me around that much in the next few days. It wasn't a lie, not really."

"Okay, so that covers your mom. Exactly how do you expect Collin and Brady to keep your disappearance a secret when their 'general' is missing? Do they know you're here?" While I was happy to have Seth's company, I was losing confidence in his plot, thinking my protectors weren't even old enough to drive!

"Nah, I didn't have to do anything like that. They're good guys but kind of gullible and scared. Basically, I told them to go home, stay human and lay low until they heard from me. I figure Sam won't come around to see what's going on until late Monday with last minute instructions for us. That gives me all day tomorrow to get the show on the road." Seth was bursting with enthusiasm, which reminded me about his "discovery" that he mentioned earlier.

"Okay, now back to this 'discovery'?" I had no idea what to expect, but I knew from past experience that anything was possible.

"Well, you've heard the guys talk about Jake phasing on the fly, right?" I nodded. I had actually seen it first-hand, but Seth probably knew that already. "Well, it always impressed me, and Jake's been getting a lot better. He could probably phase back and forth multiple times in a few seconds. Anyhow, like I was saying, it impressed me, and I spent a lot of time trying to figure out how he does it. In the beginning, I was paired up with Jake a lot because he's one of the best, and I was totally new. I kept watching him phase, focusing on his thoughts, and asked him stuff all the time. Today, after I left the beach, I came up with my idea and started practicing phasing on the fly. No one else was phased yet because they were still working out strategy and stuff. Anyhow, I can do it too! It was easy. I think maybe it's related to strong bloodlines or something... Well, whatever."

"Well, that's great, Seth. I'm happy for you, but what does this have to do with running away with me?"

"We're going to orchestrate your death, Bella, and I'm going to make sure I'm in wolf form while it happens. That way, the pack will see you die, and Edward will eventually read someone's thoughts, probably Jake's, and no one will have any doubt that you're dead."

I wasn't sure how this could be done without me _actually_ dying, but I was pretty sure Seth wasn't going to let that happen, at least not on purpose.

Seth had a look on his face like he was about to open Santa's sack of presents as he began to tell me his plan. We were going to fake a motorcycle accident in some ideal spot that he knew of. He would run after me and phase at the last minute, so the pack would see him trying to save me. We would fall off some cliff—motorcycle and all—and he would grab me in mid-air. This was one of the tricky spots in the plan, along with many others. He would be a wolf, so he had to find a way to grab me without killing me. We decided the expensive—but sturdy—backpack Alice gave me would be a good target for him to aim for. At this point, Seth was going to focus his vision on the sharp rocky bottom of the cliff he was familiar with, but in reality, he'd be pushing us out over to one side, into the open ocean. Just before landing, he'd phase back so the wolf pack would lose his thoughts when were supposed to be landing on the rocks. Seth was pretty sure they would think he died. Luckily, no one in the pack knew what it felt like to "see" a fellow wolf die, so this would be reasonably convincing.

I asked what would happen if no one was in wolf form, and therefore unable to see what he saw. He assured me that with everything happening, Sam would definitely have the patrols back full force, and someone was going to be a wolf. We only needed one to see, and the rest would experience what any one of them had seen the minute they phased.

We drove some more but eventually had to stop at a motel to sleep. The guy behind the counter took one look at us and smirked at Seth. I didn't like what I knew he was thinking. He looked me up and down, turned to Seth, and said, "Look, buddy, I don't want any trouble. Is she legal? Because I don't need her father storming in here, guns a-blazing. You get what I mean?"

I was seething and about to interject when Seth stepped forward and answered, "She's eighteen and no one's looking for her, or me for that matter." We handed over some cash, and the guy gave us a set of keys.

Seth had insisted on a room with two beds, to which the counter guy rolled his eyes and muttered, "...why bother? I wasn't born yesterday..." I decided it would be best to ignore his comments.

We slept well enough, but both of us woke up early. We were too anxious to sleep long. We checked out, went to a diner for breakfast, and rode out to the site Seth talked about. I asked him how he knew about this place. He told me early on—shortly after Harry's death—he went for a long run. The others were going to come after him, but Jacob talked them into letting him go for a short while. That was when he came upon this place. He was upset enough that he jumped off the cliff but ended up being fine because he avoided the rocks.

The cliff was off a mountainside road with very little traffic. It was at a spot where the road curved sharply. I looked over the edge and saw the rocks he was talking about. They were very large and jagged, like spikes jutting out from the ocean floor. I questioned if anyone would believe I had died if a body wasn't found. Seth assured me the tide came in over the rocks, and there was a "wicked" undertow. It would be unusual for a body to remain long.

He gave me some instructions, and we practiced riding techniques to make sure I was ready. I had to go at top speed and appear to forget where the road curved, forcing my bike off the edge. I _did_ have to remember to turn once I reached the edge to ensure the bike landed close enough to the cliff face at the bottom to ensure evidence would be left after the tide came in and went out. This last minute turning was what we practiced, using sticks and markers to denote the road and cliff edge. Seth didn't practice his part in it because he couldn't risk phasing and having anyone find out he wasn't in La Push. I had to trust that he was as good as he claimed.

We took this opportunity to empty the backpack of money and personal items. Seth hid all of it in the woods and filled the backpack with leaves and small branches.

I asked him how he was going to hide the fact that he had planned all this from his thoughts once he phased. Seth told me that it was easy enough to hide his thoughts for a short period of time. He just had to concentrate very hard on something else, and he wouldn't be phased for more than a minute. I asked him what he could concentrate on so intently that it would take his mind off his plan he was currently executing.

He didn't answer right away, but when he did he avoided looking at me, and his voice was quiet and serious.

"I'll be focusing all my thoughts on grabbing that backpack without biting down on any part of you." I had to stop myself from literally gulping out loud.

We got to the site again, and I looked over at the guardrail wondering how I was going to get past that. Seth saw me looking, went over, and smashed it in just the right place.

We were ready now. Both of us were up the road a bit before the bend. Seth was ready to go. He had only his underwear on. He didn't want to phase until the last minute so no stray thoughts would escape. He also needed to preserve his clothes because he had forgotten to pack anything before meeting me. I assumed he decided the underwear would be expendable in exchange for maintaining some sense of modesty. I looked straight ahead.

Seth had told me I could go whenever I was ready. I took a deep breath and started the engine. It happened so fast, barely a few seconds I'm sure, but I saw and felt every moment for a long time afterwards.

I flew along the road at top speed, and it was no problem "forgetting" to steer at the bend because it appeared faster than I had anticipated. Thankfully, I _did_ remember to steer right before the cliff edge. Actually, it was an impulse reaction. I'm pretty sure that my body saw the drop off and forced my hands to steer the bike away from it. I could feel the tires skidding sideways. Dust blew up around me, and it was difficult to see. Then, I felt a cool breeze, and the dust dissipated. The ocean roared below as white foam ravaged against the razor sharp rocks. Panic set in and consciousness began to fade as I felt a strong jerk pulling me backwards.

I was flying. The motorcycle was no longer beneath me, and I moved past the rocky shore. Something was pulling at my right shoulder so hard that my arm felt like it might fall off. My left side was numb and cold. I smelled rust and salt as nausea set in. Just as I thought I would lose my breakfast, I was submersed in ice-cold water. I struggled to swim and was weighed down by clothes, shoes, and a helmet. The current was strong, and it pushed me in every direction but up. I was sure this was the end. I would drown in this cold hell like I should have that day I went cliff diving. But, just like that day, a warm body grabbed me and lifted me out of the water. I was weak and unable to stay awake. I wanted to open my eyes and speak, but my throat was burning, and my head was spinning. Eventually, the darkness won out.

I felt lighter. I wasn't weighed down anymore, and it wasn't as cold. Warmth enveloped me, but I couldn't speak. The smell of rust and salt had come back. I mustered up all the strength I had to open my eyes. I saw the scenery bounce around quickly, making me feel nauseated again. I wasn't touching the ground, but I wasn't floating either. I looked up and saw Seth's grave face.

"Seth, what happened? Did I do something wrong?" He stopped suddenly, stared down at me. His grim expression gave way to relief.

"Oh my god, Bella. I thought you were going to die! Are you in a lot of pain? I know it's a rough ride, but I have to get us back as fast as I can before you lose more blood."

Blood? What blood? I looked down at myself and saw that one side of my torso was covered in red as blood oozed from between Seth's fingers. He was carrying me in his arms as he made his way back to the road. I tried to focus on the surroundings to take my mind off the blood, but I could see a trail of it behind us.

"Stop!" I shouted. Seth came to an alarmingly fast halt. "The blood..." I sputtered out, pointing to the trail. "We can't leave that."

Seth turned to look, then looked down at me. "I'll get it later," he said and went back to climbing.

It didn't take long, and I was amazed at the strength he possessed. It wasn't so surprising for Jacob—a virtual giant—to have super human strength, but Seth was no bigger than some of the boys I went to school with. Well, the ones on the football team anyway.

Once we were back at our spot in the forest, Seth went to work. I decided to wait until later to ask what happened because he seemed frantic and shaken. He mouthed words to himself, as if trying to remember the steps for doing something. When he tore off my shirt I felt heat rise to my cheeks, but I got over my own bare state when I noticed Seth was naked. I blushed profusely, but he didn't bother to get dressed. Instead, he moved quickly to tend to my injury, losing all traces of the modesty I saw earlier.

I couldn't see the wound, but I knew it was beneath my shoulder because I definitely felt it. It hurt a lot. I also couldn't see what Seth was doing, but I felt that too. There was a lot of pressure followed by sharp pangs that ignited my wound with pain each time he reached in to do whatever it was he was doing. Next, he whipped off my shoes and pants before I had time to protest. I reached to try and get dry clothes on myself but winced and fell back down, allowing Seth to dress me.

I lay looking to the side at the moss and ferns, doing everything I could to remain conscious. My eyes drifted upwards, and I saw Seth with his back to me, pulling up a pair of pants. Next, he gathered twigs and sticks, and in a few minutes he had a fire going.

"I'm going to clean up the trail of blood. I won't be long. I've left a bottle of water beside you. The cap is already off, so be careful not to knock it over. The fire should keep you warm."

"What are you, the prize winning boy scout?" I asked, nodding towards the fire.

Seth smiled and left, shouting, "I'll be right back," as he ran out through the trees.

He returned before the fire had a chance to die down. Now that the immediate need to dress my wound and clean our bloody trail had passed, Seth's face was scrunched up in thought.

"Bella, I don't know what to do. I should have thought to get supplies beforehand in case of an injury." Seth paced as he brushed a hand through his hair.

"I'm okay. You go. I'll wait here." I was trying hard to sound normal, but it wasn't even convincing to me.

"I can't leave you. The store's too far away, and who knows what could happen in that time? You have to come with me. Do you think you'd be all right if I carried you?"

"Seth, you've got to be spent by now. You haven't eaten lunch. It would be better for you to go on your own. You'll be faster alone." The last thing we needed was for both of us to be out of commission.

"No. I'm going to carry you. At least you're not bleeding anymore. Do you have another jacket?"

I nodded and pointed to our hiding spot. Seth dug out a jacket, took off his shirt, then bundled the two together and gave it to me.

"Here, hold that with your good arm while I carry you. We need those to stay clean," he said.

I winced again as he lifted me up. He had to shift me a little, but eventually, I was secure and reasonably comfortable in his arms. Seth began to run through the forest.

He was faster than I thought he'd be. I was worried at first because he was younger and smaller than Jacob, plus it had been hours since breakfast, but his pace never slowed. His breathing was even the whole time, and he never showed signs of strain or fatigue.

"Seth? Can you talk, or will it make you too tired?" I asked.

"I can talk," he answered.

"What happened?"

"I over-shot. I should have been more careful. My aim was a little off, and my teeth tore into you. I can't tell you how sorry I am."

"I'm not upset, Seth. You did everything right. I'm fine, and we're both alive. Besides, it's just a flesh wound." I didn't really know what kind of wound it was since I couldn't see it, but I wanted to reassure him.

"I wish it was as minor as you're trying to make it sound. It's pretty nasty. You're going to have a really bad scar." He chuckled then and I looked up at him curiously. "Too bad it wasn't one of the guys. They'd go around bragging about their 'battle scar' until it healed. Maybe even afterwards. Hey, you know what? You could get plastic surgery or something. Okay, that's my plan. I'm going get every odd job from now until I die to pay for that!"

"Don't be ridiculous." I smiled and rolled my eyes playfully. "It's on my back, not my fa–" I couldn't finish the sentence as an image of Emily's scarred face appeared in my mind. "It's no big deal. I care more that your plan worked. Did I do everything all right?"

"You did everything just the way we practiced. You were perfect." He beamed down at me. "And we really lucked out with timing. Jared and Paul were just about to come off patrol as Jake and Quil were coming on, so all four were phased when it all went down. I felt their thoughts, and every single one of them think we're dead, no doubt about it."

Jacob. My chest caved in at the thought of his suffering.

"Jacob...saw?"

"Yeah. Sorry, I wasn't thinking that way. He's fine. I mean, he's pretty broken up, but he'll be okay. He really wants to kill the super-vamps now."

I didn't say anything else, but inside, I was terrified of what Jacob would do once he faced the Volturi. I knew he was filled with rage right now. I doubted he'd be capable of thinking clearly. If only I could speak to him, or touch him, for one minute. I wanted to do _something_ to calm him.

We travelled the rest of the way in silence. I didn't know how far we went, but Seth ran pretty fast; yet it still took us over an hour to get to a town. Seth put me down, put on his shirt and helped me with my jacket.

"Okay, I can hold you up a bit as we walk. Don't rush. We're just going to get some supplies and things," Seth said as he positioned himself next to me.

"No. You have to eat first," I insisted.

"I'll grab a candy bar or something while we shop. I want to get back and treat your wound properly before it gets infected."

"No. We eat first." There was no way I was going to let him carry me all the way back on a candy bar. I'd seen the wolves eat, and I was sure he'd be starving right now. I wasn't going to lose another argument to a kid barely out of middle school, even if he _did_ have super-human strength.

"Okay, but you have to eat, too," Seth relented. He seemed relieved, actually.

We stopped at the first fast food place we encountered, and I watched as Seth ate about fifty dollars worth of fast food. I guess I was right. He was definitely hungry. I wondered how Sue could afford to feed both him and Leah. I hoped they at least helped with the cooking.

After lunch, we went to a Wal-Mart. It was a little embarrassing at first because I had to be seated in one of those motorized wheelchair carts, but after I got used to it, it was fun.

Seth worked quickly tossing in clothes, sneakers, toiletry items, and all sorts of bandages, lotions, potions, and pills.

"What is all this stuff?" I asked skeptically. It seemed like he was haphazardly grabbing anything.

"It's to take care of your injury."

"Are you going to be performing surgery, or are you just getting one of everything? Do you even know what you're doing?"

"Mom's a nurse, and Leah and I were rough kids. I know the drill almost as well as she does." Seth rifled through shelves looking for something. "Crap. I'll have to check in the camping section."

He raced our cart to the camping supply area, and I was grateful for my motorized scooter as I raced behind him. Seth began tossing more things in. There was a large backpack, a sleeping bag, and a medical supply kit. I noticed he had rummaged through many, reading the labels before selecting one. I glanced at it to see what made this particular one special and saw in big, bold letters, _suture kit_.

"No! Absolutely not! It doesn't even hurt anymore, I swear. No way are you going to sew my shoulder!"

"Aw, Bella, I have to. The wound is really big. The only reason you're not sitting in a pool of your own blood right now is because I've packed it, but I can't leave that gaping hole in your back. I got some painkillers and topical anesthetic. It won't hurt that much, I promise." Seth obviously didn't know me that well.

"Seth, I'm going to throw up all over you and pass out if you try to sew me up," I said in as serious a tone as I could muster.

"I've got a change of clothes now, but you won't throw up. I promise," he replied with a winsome smile. I sighed and put the kit back in the cart. We'd see how happy he'll be after he got covered in my vomit.

We got back to our hiding spot in the forest in good time, and Seth got to work right away. He really did know what he was doing. He got me to take a few Advil and Tylenol. I raised my eyebrows questioningly.

"It's not beer and tranquilizers. Trust me, you can mix these."

"How do you know?"

"My mom."

"What? You get killer headaches?"

"No. Leah used to get killer cramps." Seth's face scrunched up, and he rolled his eyes. I looked away, embarrassed. "Yeah, tell me about it. Nothing was a secret in my house. The term 'too much information' was tailor made for my mom and Leah."

I took the pills as he undid the make shift dressings and cleaned out my wound. It hurt a lot. I didn't even try to hold back the screams. Once it was cleaned, he applied a whole tube of topical anesthetic, and I braced myself to get stitched, but nothing happened.

"I thought I needed stitches?" I asked.

"You do, but it takes a little while for that gel to be effective. I'm going to get all the other stuff ready first." Seth laid out a towel and lined up the suture kit, bandages, scissors, tape, cotton, and antiseptic. He was very neat and organized. I was impressed and felt more confident about entrusting him to care for me.

Once the medical supplies were laid out, Seth made a fire again to keep me warm. The painkillers had taken effect, and the tube of gel had numbed the skin on my shoulder. I was basking in the heat of the fire, finally feeling comfortable, when Seth spoke.

"Okay, it's time."

I grimaced at his announcement.

"I was being serious, Seth. I'm going to throw up and faint. I hope you know CPR, because I might stop breathing afterwards. In fact, you might have to perform mouth to mouth _after_ I throw up. Think about it. Do you _really_ want to do that?" I knew I was being a big baby, but my shoulder felt fine. Besides, seeing his mom stitch someone up wasn't the same as doing it himself. For all I knew, he had never sewn anything in his life. He didn't exactly strike me as the token guy who ended up in home economics instead of shop.

"I'll be careful, promise. Here, lie down on your stomach on the sleeping bag. It'll be easier for you to stay still."

I sighed and did as I was told.

I didn't vomit, and I didn't faint, but it was not painless.

The gel did numb my skin somewhat, but the numbing was restricted to a thin, surface layer. I probably made a bigger fuss than warranted, but I wasn't happy about the situation. I screamed bloody murder every time I felt my flesh get poked or pulled. Seth was gracious and patient. He never called me a wimp or asked me to stop screaming. When it was over, he cleaned the wound once more, taped some gauze bandaging to it, and quietly helped me put my shirt back on. He fastened the sling we had purchased to keep my arm from moving around and started packing up our belongings.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"We have to find a place to stay for a few days," Seth answered.

"How are you going to carry me back to town with all our stuff?"

"It's just one backpack, but I won't be carrying you. We're going further away, so we'll have to get a ride."

"What do you mean? Is there a bus station close by?"

"We're going to hitchhike."

"Seth, that's dangerous. Who knows what kind of crazy person will pick us up?"

"Nothing's going to happen to us because some regular human gave us a ride. What's anyone going to do that I can't handle?" He was very matter-of-fact in his reply, not boastful. I had to admit, in the face of vampires and werewolves, some random nut case didn't seem all that challenging.

"Fine," I replied with resignation. Another point for the middle school kid.

"Don't worry, Bella. I'm going to get us a ride while you sit in the shadows. It's less likely some creep will stop for a big native guy. Chances are we'll end up with some trucker who feels like giving a kid a break."

In the end, Seth was right. I stood back, away from the road, while he stood with his thumb out. It took a little while, but a truck did finally stop. Seth talked to the driver briefly, then waved for me to come out. We climbed in, with Seth between me and the driver. He was a pleasant enough middle-aged man, although he seemed a bit scruffy. He didn't ask too many questions—which was a relief—and what he did ask, Seth answered.

After a couple more rides, Seth put on the backpack and lifted me up in his arms. We trotted the rest of the way to a small town. It was dark by now, and I couldn't make out any signs, but Seth seemed to know where he was going. We passed a few motels by the roadside before coming to a large, quaint house at the edge of town, near a heavily forested area. At first I wondered why we had stopped at someone's house but noticed a sign informing me that it was a bed and breakfast. Seth let me down, and we walked in together through a freshly painted blue door.

Mrs. Brock, the proprietor, was a pleasant woman. She was plump and a little past middle age. Seth told her we were college students taking a hiking trip and wanted to treat ourselves to a few nights at a hotel. She beamed at him and took our information. I thought she might actually pat Seth on the head. She asked him all sorts of questions, and Seth was able to rattle off answers. I was amazed such a young, sensitive boy could come up with lies like that on the fly. Was _everyone_ about to do this but me? I made a point of listening carefully, so I wouldn't get tripped up later. Apparently, I was an English literature major at UW and Seth, also at UW, was taking political science. He was hoping to get into law school next year. How did he do this?

I was still dumbfounded as we got settled in our room. Seth zipped around quickly, unpacking a few things and getting cleaned up. He came out with a fresh set of clothes on, smiling. He was almost always smiling.

"You hungry? Maybe we can go over to that restaurant Mrs. Brock suggested? It's not too late. It should still be open."

"Yeah, sounds good," I replied, getting up from the bed.

We sat in the restaurant while I watched Seth eat another marathon meal. I was really happy Alice had packed so much money. He ate a lot, and very quickly but always exhibited impeccable table manners. Sue and Harry had certainly done a good job of raising him.

The meal lasted a long time, mostly due to the quantity of food consumed, but was pleasant. The conversation flowed easily, and Seth was happy to talk about anything and everything, but mostly we talked about Jacob.

He really liked Jacob and looked up to him. I loved hearing things from Seth's perspective, especially knowing that he was often inside Jake's head. I was a little embarrassed about how _much_ he knew about us, but I suppose that couldn't be helped.

Just as we were finishing dessert, Seth got upset when my motorcycle was mentioned. He was distraught about having to wreck it.

"Seth, Jake will understand. He was the one that told me it would have to be ditched in a few days."

"Yeah, I guess you're right, but he loves those bikes, yours and his. You know, on account of how you gave them to him, and fixing them up was how the two of you got to know each other better. Every time he thinks about how he fell in love with you—_really_ fell in love, not just the crush he had from the year before—he thinks about spending time with you in the garage fixing up those bikes. At least he still has his."

I felt guilty. Jacob had attached all this sentiment to the motorcycles, not knowing the real reason why I wanted them. I had always thought I didn't deserve Edward because I wasn't as beautiful or talented, and those same feelings came back that day on the beach in Jacksonville with Jacob. Now, having realized how I had tarnished Jacob's memories of our relationship, I realized I actually _was_ undeserving. But it wasn't because I was plain, clumsy, or talentless. None of those things made a person undeserving. I was unworthy of his love because I was a selfish egomaniac—I was so much so that it blinded me to everything but my own needs.

It sickened me to think how I had used Jacob's affection for a chance to hear Edward's voice. How horrible could a person be that she would knowingly—and I certainly _knew_ how Jacob felt about me—let a sixteen-year-old boy fall in love with her so she could cling to the memory of the one who dumped her? It wasn't just Jake who suffered because of me. What about all those summers when I refused to visit Charlie in Forks because it was boring? I was all Charlie had of family, and I wouldn't sacrifice a few weeks a year because I didn't like the rain? His three weeks with his only child ended up being one week in a strange place because I didn't like the weather.

How was I ever going to tell Jacob the truth? All the time we had spent together was a lie. The hiking, the motorcycle rebuilding, and even the playful banter we shared about our ages. My plan was clear for a long time. Jacob was a means of healing, but Edward was my only goal. Sure, things changed after a while, but the lies were left hidden.

I looked at Seth as he scooped up the last few crumbs of his dessert. His face was filled with innocence and optimism. It was how Jacob had looked before he'd phased for the first time. I had blamed Sam for the change in Jacob, but I knew it wasn't Sam's fault. I thought about what Jacob would lose once I told him that time with me, before he started phasing—a time I knew he cherished—was a lie. Worse than a lie. They were a means to having a small part of Edward back. How would he reconcile those lies that were the foundation of our relationship with the truth of Edward's promises that I had yet to share with him? If I were in his place, would I be able to happily accept all that? Once he knew the whole truth, would there be enough of my Jacob left, or would he be consumed by so much bitterness that he'd be lost to me forever? I thought about the tarnished memories and withheld truths and replied to Seth's comments, determined to be a different person.

"Don't worry about the motorcycle, Seth. Jacob and I will make new memories, better than those bikes."

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><p><em>Wow... have you read ten chapters of this story without leaving a review for the author? I hear she's really nice and squees every time she receives one.<em>

_Next up is Chapter 11 - Metamorphosis_


	11. Metamorphosis

_There's a lot of angst in this chapter as Bella is consumed by the negative impact her decisions and actions have had on others._

_Thanks to my new permanent assignment beta with PTB: loveofescapism_

_You were great! All your suggestions were terrific, and it made this chapter so much better._

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><p><strong>Chapter 11 - Metamorphosis<strong>

Once Seth and I came back from dinner, I couldn't get my mind off Jacob. Eventually, my thoughts drifted to our last moments together and the wound on his shoulder. I realized there didn't have to be any unanswered questions with Seth around.

"Seth, how did Jacob get hurt that night we left Forks?" Seth looked up from whatever he was fiddling with and paused without answering. I raised my eyebrows and looked at him questioningly. He didn't want to tell me. Instead, he went back to fiddling nervously and biting his lower lip. Perhaps he wasn't _supposed_ to tell me, but I had a feeling he'd crack. "Well?"

"Things kind of got heated after you left," he mumbled without making eye contact.

"What do you mean? Did Jacob get into a fight with Alice?" As much as Jacob hated the Cullens, I couldn't imagine him going at it with Alice. They had their differences, but there wasn't _that_ much hatred between them.

"No, not Alice."

"Then who? Sam?" I was running out of ideas, and Seth wasn't being very forthright with information.

"Edward," Seth answered apprehensively.

"What? How? Where?" I couldn't imagine how or why this happened that night. Seth paced, looking torn. He was running his fingers through his hair nervously. Finally, he let out a resigned sigh.

"The rest of the Cullens showed up on the beach after you left. They felt it would be best if Alice came alone first to explain, so we wouldn't think they were ambushing us on our land or anything."

"Oh." I tried to sound neutral, but I was disappointed the Cullens hadn't arrived while I was there. It would have been nice to have said goodbye. I felt left out.

"But how did they start fighting? The Cullens were there and so was Sam. How did it start?" I couldn't picture the two of them breaking out into fisticuffs the minute they saw each other. Not if everyone was around to stop them. I looked at Seth, imploring him to answer, but he pretended to be fascinated with the zipper on the sleeping bag. "Seth?"

"Aw, Bella... They got worked up because you became the topic of conversation during our strategy session."

"How did _that_ happen?" I knew Seth was trying to protect my feelings, or perhaps someone else's, but I felt I should know. After all, it was about me. "Well?"

"You called Edward, all upset and in tears. You know, about that story you told Charlie."

"Wait! Are you telling me that Edward was at the bonfire when he answered his phone?" Seth nodded silently, avoiding my gaze. "Guess that's why he seemed amused by the whole exchange," I muttered bitterly. "I don't understand how this could've started a fight."

"Well, at first we were _all_ amused." I cringed. Darn, there were too many people with super-sonic hearing! "After Edward hung up he said something about how you were cute, then Jake got in his face saying he wasn't taking this seriously, and that nothing about this situation was 'cute'. Edward took issue with that and said Jacob didn't know how much Edward was willing to give up for you. Both of them were really pissed, Jake blamed Edward for everything—you getting involved with vampires, the Volturi knowing about our alliance, Victoria being alive because the Cullens didn't share information with us, and all of us turning into werewolves in the first place. You name it. If he could think up a way, I'm pretty sure he would have blamed Edward for his mother dying, too."

Jacob must have fallen apart and lost himself along the way to have succumbed to such bitterness. I dropped my head into my hands, shaking it back and forth.

"Then Edward blamed the pack for going across the treaty line to chase Victoria, allowing her to see us work together," Seth continued. "He blamed us for Victoria still being alive and able to go to the Volturi. He even blamed us for Alice not being able to 'see' better. It made everyone pretty pissed at him. All the Cullens tried to calm Edward down, and we had to hold Jake back because they were ready to go at it. Finally, Jake phased out of nowhere. We didn't even feel him tremble or blur first. He knocked Paul and Sam off their feet and they both got nasty scratches as a result. He lunged at Edward, who actually looked surprised. He did end up sort of twisting out of the way fast enough, but it was awkward and stuff happened."

"What _stuff_?"

"The stuff that caused that scar on Jake's shoulder." I looked at Seth again with questioning eyes and impatient hand gestures, demanding more. He bit a fingernail but eventually spoke.

"I don't think Jake wants me to tell you."

"Did he _tell_ you not to tell me?"

"Well, no, but that's because he had no idea I'd see you!"

"There were no promises made. That means you can tell." Again, Seth paced anxiously, messing up his hair with his fingers.

"Fine. Edward did some last minute evasive move. It was awkward and not so well thought out because I guess he's not used to getting attacked without more warning." I couldn't picture Edward moving awkwardly. "Both of them were growling and baring their teeth, and Edward's teeth accidentally grazed Jake's shoulder."

"_What_? Jake...is he okay? When I saw him he was so pale... Is he dying?" I remembered Jacob telling me vampire venom was poison for the wolves. I wished I hadn't run away. I wanted to be with him more than anything right now. And more than anything, I wanted to punish Edward.

"Calm down, Bella; he's fine. He started looking pretty badly, pretty quickly. I've never seen a Quileute look so pale, but the Cullens all grabbed Edward and restrained him. The rest of the pack phased and were about to attack, but Emmett stopped them and said Jacob needed their help. They told us about when you were bitten and decided to try the same thing. The only problem was none of the wolves could do it because we couldn't risk getting the venom in us, so that left the Cullens.

"I can tell you, it was a pretty tense moment. No one wanted a vamp to suck Jake's blood and none of the Cullens wanted to go near a wolf's blood either. Lucky for Jake, Rosalie volunteered right away."

"Rosalie? Are you sure you got the name right?" I couldn't imagine _she'd_ be the one to do it.

"Yeah, the really hot blond who's with the big guy, Emmett. She's really tough, right?"

"Yeah, that's Rosalie."

"There weren't too many options. It had to be her, the big guy or the blonde dude because Alice and Esme left to meet Charlie at their house."

"Oh, yeah. Charlie..."

"Anyhow, Jake had already started healing so they had to rip the wound open again before she started sucking out his blood. We all thought she was going to drain him dry because he started to look weaker and even paler. His lips were turning blue, but Jasper stopped us from getting all freaked out saying it was the only way to make sure no venom was left. Fortunately, we wolves heal really fast so it didn't take long for Jake's body to make more blood. We pumped him full of food and cokes for as long as he could stomach it. Of course, it wasn't so great for Rosalie. We realized afterwards that we didn't have to worry about her draining Jake after all."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I thought since they drank animal blood ours wouldn't be all that different, but as soon as she was done she ran into the bushes and puked it all up. It was downright disgusting. I've got to say one thing though, Rosalie is one tough chick. She didn't flinch or anything, even though she said it was like sucking rats or something. I don't even want to know how she'd know _that_."

I was relieved that Jacob was okay, but new worries had instantly surfaced. If this was how Edward and Jacob reacted to my leaving, what were they going to do to each other now that they thought I was dead? I was going to ask Seth for his opinion, but I wasn't ready to hear the answer. Instead, I grabbed my toiletry bag and went to the bathroom. There was nothing I could do right now. The best thing was to try and get a good night's sleep so that I'd have a clear head in the morning.

Before long, we were cleaned up and ready to call it a night. I climbed into the bed feeling guilty. Seth had insisted I take the bed while he slept in the sleeping bag on the floor.

It was a waste of a perfectly good bed because I didn't sleep much. I woke up well after midnight—while it was still black outside—unable to sleep anymore. My thoughts were focused on Jacob and all the wrongs I had committed. There were the motorcycles, the broken promise, and the secrets kept from him. All of it had created a web of deceit that made me feel trapped in some other person's life. It was evidence of someone who was vile, selfish, and uncaring. This wasn't the person I thought I was, but it _was_ me. They had all been _my_ decisions.

I thought I had been honest with Jacob from the beginning, but I hadn't been. I remembered his words to me a couple of months ago, and they haunted me now.

_Right now, I don't care if you're here because you need me, or that you're even using me._

Jacob believed I had used him to put myself together, to regain sanity. He had no clue I was using him to follow a hallucination of Edward. I had single-handedly ruined one of Jacob's most endearing memories of _us_.

And it didn't stop there. I remembered other words, on another night.

_Is he going to cast a shadow on every moment we have together?_

It was true, and it was all my fault. I kept playing the victim—torn between Edward and Jacob—in love with both of them, but it turned out _they_ were the victims, not me. What if I loved them both? At least I had a choice. My only obligation was to choose and let the other one go. Indecision was not equivalent to being victimized. I had made excuses like, "I can't lie" to get past having to do unpleasant things, but that wasn't accurate. I _had_ lied, and I could do it again. The truth was, I didn't _want_ to. I had successfully lied to Charlie when James was chasing me, I lied to Jacob to get those bikes fixed and to look for the meadow, and I had lied to Edward, over and over, to keep from disappointing him. I should have lied to prevent this mess from ever getting this far.

To add to it, I made promises that I broke the first opportunity I got. Jacob had begged me for time, and it was a fair request. He only asked for a chance.

_Just give me the same time and then you can go to him for as long as you need to._

I told him I'd do this, for him and for us, but it only lasted until an opportunity arose for me to break it. It wasn't even a good reason. I was only irritated about some phone calls. I could've waited and asked Alice at school, or called the Cullens. I could've called Jake to see if he had found out anything, but ultimately, I accepted no less than _exactly_ what I wanted, which was to see Edward. Was it because I absolutely _had_ to know _that_ night, or had I still been drawn to him?

It was too late now. I should never have told Jacob I still loved Edward. What could he have gained with that knowledge? Even if he already suspected it, there was no reason for me to confirm it. If our roles were reversed, I wouldn't have wanted to hear _that_ come from Jacob's lips. And I should've told Edward I didn't love him anymore. What difference did it make if it were true or not? The only thing that mattered was if I were going to choose him or Jacob. I thought long and hard about why I perpetuated this triangle before I discovered the selfish truth. I _wanted_ a safety net. Letting one go, so he could move on, meant he would no longer be available to me. My actions told me that possessing them both was more important than happiness for either of them.

Edward gave me was exactly what I sought out. He had all the time in the world to wait, and he would if I gave him any semblance of hope. No matter what rationalizations I devised to ease my guilt, the truth couldn't hide anymore. I told myself Jacob could imprint and leave me high and dry, but I knew that wasn't the reason either. I had been doing doing this well before I knew about imprinting.

How about Jacob? Did I ever consider what he was feeling when I found out about imprinting? Jacob hated having this "happen" to him. He was a doer, not one to sit back and let fate dictate his life. He fought being a werewolf, and he fought Sam's Alpha orders, successfully. Wasn't I the one who had called him persistent? Why didn't I trust him when he told me he'd always love me and never leave? He had never given me a reason to doubt him.

He protected me and loved me with everything he had. What had I done for him in return? I made sure he would never forget that I still loved an immortal with a bottomless wallet who would be waiting to take me away the moment he made a mistake. That actually _was_ a guarantee.

And poor Edward, he would be waiting for decades hoping that I'd come back to him one day. How would that end for him? Would he wait until my dying day, never to have his love requited? Maybe, I'd end up crawling back to him, a diseased old woman afraid to die. How would that be fair? How was that unselfish?

I had the power to end this all during these past months, and I chose to keep it going, feeding it at every turn. I brought nothing but destruction. Even the vampires that came to Forks—endangering those I loved—were here only for me. I deserved nothing good. I created the tension and competition between Jacob and Edward. They fought over me, and me alone. If it weren't for me, their two families would have continued to coexist separately. Even a year ago, if I hadn't gone off on my own when James was after me, Victoria would probably have been dead by now.

I felt tears well up in my eyes as a dim halo of light began to peek through the trees. I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. I stood at the sink looking at my reflection in the mirror. Who would ever suspect this unremarkable teenage girl was the slayer of dreams and bringer of destruction? How long would it be before I destroyed both Jacob and Edward? What about Charlie? Would I end up destroying him, too? And poor Seth, what would my involvement in his life do to him?

I didn't deserve Jacob's love. I didn't deserve Edward's love. I didn't deserve Charlie's love. I didn't even deserve Seth's help. Bad things should be happening to _me_, not them. All this time I thought my weaknesses were guilt, low self-esteem, and timidity, but they weren't. I was selfish, egocentric, and cowardly. I did everything I could to make sure the two men who loved me clung to the scraps of hope I threw their way. Right now, the two of them—and each of their "families"—were fighting for _my_ life while I hid safely away, afraid to face my enemies.

I saw the scissors sitting on the shelf with the medical supplies. I picked it up, feeling the cool metal against my hand. I looked in the mirror at my reflection. My pale face was overwhelmed by the mass of dishevelled hair that framed it. Cold hard hands had stroked my hair, inhaled the scent, and whispered words of love into it. Blazing hot fingers had become entangled in it, holding on in desperation. A warm, woodsy breath had murmured into my hair, professing everlasting loyalty. Desperation had led the lips of devotion to caress my hair. It was desperation my indecision had created.

My hair was soft and cool, but not as cool as the metal blades of the scissors. An ugly person had created this ugly situation. The long, thick hair didn't belong on her.

_snip_

_snip_

_snip snip snip _

_cut cut cut_

_hack hack hack _

It wasn't enough. I was still the same.

I gripped the edge of the sink. The scissors fell in with a loud clink. My eyes clouded over. I felt my knees weaken as by body began to descend towards the floor. The cold, hard tile looked welcoming.

_Maybe having my skin against its chill would be enough. _

I sank slowly onto the floor. I didn't feel cold, and it wasn't hard. Instead, I felt heat as my legs and arms dangled.

"Bella, open your eyes!"

Everything was shaking. Was the earth about to swallow me up? Why was everything shaking?

"Please, Bella, say something!"

Knocking.

Muffled voices.

A loud bang.

"God dammit! You've _got_ to be kidding me!"

Burning on my cheek.

Cold liquid.

Can't breathe.

"Stop! You're going to kill her!"

"It's just water for crying out loud! Put her down, and piss off, Seth."

My eyes were open but things still looked distorted, and I was cold. Then that burning sensation on my cheek returned. I knew what it was now. Someone had slapped me.

I looked into the mirror at my dripping wet face. Behind me, holding a fistful of my shorn hair, was everything I wasn't but wanted to be. She was strong, brave, and risked her life for the safety of others. She made her own rules and followed them. I was sure she never stumbled.

"Stop staring at me like that. You've freaked me out enough today," she snarled. I lowered my gaze to the sink in shame as she continued to talk. "Seth, get a chair and put it in the tub."

A towel was wrapped around my neck, and my hair was combed. Then, I was led to the chair in the tub. She sat me down, stood behind me and told me not to move.

"You're lucky I decided to find out what the hell my damn brother was up to. There is _no __way_ he'd be able to do _anything_ with this hair of yours." She began to cut small bits of my hair.

I saw tiny clumps of it falling as Leah combed through what remained on my head. I sobbed aloud. I didn't want to, but I couldn't stop myself. When had I become so awful? My sobbing became hysterical and the little hairs stopped falling.

"Quit your belly aching; I'm trying to do something about this mop of yours. Stay still!" Leah scolded. It made me sob even louder. I tried to reply but couldn't form coherent sounds. All I could muster were hiccups and sniffles.

"Jesus H. Christ! What right do _you_ have to cry? Who the hell ever hurt _you_?" Suddenly, I felt a firm grip on my chin and my head was spun around as far as it could without being snapped from my neck. I was facing my accuser.

"I hurt Jacob, and causing him pain makes me hurt too!" I shouted. "You don't know what I've done! You don't know what a horrible person I am!"

"First of all, no one feels badly for a person because she's all overwrought with guilt over hurting someone, _especially __me_. Second, no matter what you've done you have no right to cry! If you've done something so damn terrible then fix it! Don't be such a weak, blubbering idiot! And what the hell are you talking about, anyway? Jake's the one that kept this whole imprinting crap from you. What the hell did you ever do to him other than choose him over money bags bloodsucker?"

"Leah, go easy on her," Seth spoke hesitantly from the doorway.

"Stay out of it, Seth! When you're a grown-up, and have had your heart shattered, you can have a say. Until then, go for a walk!" Seth raised his hands in surrender and left without another word.

I did my best to control my frenetic crying, taking slow deep breaths.

"You're right about me, Leah. I'm a coward. I wish I were strong, like you."

"I'm not strong, not the way you're implying. I'm just a bitch—no pun intended. You just don't know the difference."

"If you're right about being...not nice, you are completely justified."

"Yeah, whatever. Jake has a big mouth. I'm not here to talk about me. I'm actually not here to talk to you at all."

"Oh, sorry."

Leah sighed very loudly. I couldn't see her face because she was standing behind me again—cutting my hair—but I was pretty sure she was rolling her eyes.

"Spit it out. You need to get it off your chest, and I have the misfortune of being the only adult available for you to talk to." I hesitated at first, but the urge to speak overwhelmed me. It wasn't long before I blurted everything out.

"My relationship with Jacob was built on a lie, and he doesn't know it. In the beginning I spent all that time with him because I wanted a way to hear Edward's voice." Leah stopped what she was doing and brought her face in front of mine, raising her eyebrows and questioning me with her gaze. "I was hallucinating back in the winter. I'd hear Edward every time I did something dangerous. I used Jake to fix up those bikes so I could ride them. I used him to try and find the meadow that used to be a special place for me and Edward. Jacob thinks the only thing I used him for was to cheer myself up, and get out of my depression. I was doing just the opposite the whole time. I was using him to slip further into my own little world. Seth told me Jacob sees that time as some of the best of his life. For him, that was when he fell in love with me, and the reality is I was using him to pursue Edward. How do I tell him the truth and tarnish all his memories of falling in love?"

"Jake will forgive you."

"There's more. I promised I'd give him a chance, six months—like Edward had—and I broke it the first opportunity I had."

"Yeah, yeah, I know all about that, and he forgives you for that. It's not like you went crawling back to Cullen afterwards."

"I'm not finished..." I trailed off, not wanting to tell her about Edward's offer. Leah didn't ask.

"Look, you should probably know this about Jake but apparently you don't," She said, ignoring my self-loathing list. You could cut off his right arm, spit on his dad, and total his car, and he'd still forgive you. If you can't handle keeping secrets, tell him straight out. He'll act pissed off, you'll get sad, and then he'll completely melt and forgive you. Trust me; I know how pathetic he is."

"That's not right; he should hate me. The whole time, I _knew_ how he felt about me. I _knew_ he loved me, and I used his love to get what I wanted."

"Is that what this is all about? You feel like you should be punished, and the best you could come up with is cutting your hair? If you want, I could give you a good beating. If you think it'll make things better, of course."

"This is serious to me, Leah."

"Oh, I'm being serious."

"Does that mean you think I'm a horrible person?"

"I haven't decided about the horrible person part yet, but you _are_ stupid." I was taken out of my misery just long enough to be irritated with her.

"I'm not stupid! Why would you say that?"

"Because, you're in the driver's seat. You can do anything you want and both those idiot guys will take you. You have nothing to be upset about. What you did in the past is in the past, and it'll all be forgiven. Deep down, you know that. The only thing causing you pain is yourself and your own damn guilt. Get over it! You know as well as I do, ultimately Jake won't give a rat's ass about what happened. He's too happy you didn't go back to Count Dracula." I sat in silence, not commenting on anything Leah said, unwilling to admit any of it was true. She proceeded to snip at my hair and comb it in sections before she spoke again. "You have doubts, don't you? That's why you're all wound up like this, isn't it?"

I wasn't prepared for that. I diverted the conversation in her direction, to get some of the answers I sought at the bonfire.

"If you knew—beforehand—that Sam could imprint on someone else, and that person would definitely _not_ be you, would you have stayed with him?" I asked. Leah was silent for a moment, her hands no longer touching my hair.

"I don't know. Right now, I want to say no because I hate being this way, but back then, when I was with him and we were in love... I couldn't imagine anything could make me leave him. I believed we could overcome _anything_. Even now, when I _know_ it's impossible, if I were honest with myself, I'd have to admit that I still have a spark of hope that he might still come back to me because I know he loves me, too."

"So, if Jake imprinted, that would be it for us, wouldn't it?"

"Jake's not Sam."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Jake does things on his own terms. He's stronger than Sam in almost every way. If anyone can fight all this fairy-tale mysticism, it's Jacob."

"What makes you say that? Jake's just a kid, a sixteen-year-old high school student. How's he different than the rest of the pack, and certainly, how's he stronger than Sam?"

"Look, I'm not going to spill all the beans on pack politics, but trust me when I say Jake's strong." Leah sighed before continuing. "For shit's sake! You know all about us, don't you?" I nodded and shrugged, not knowing exactly what she was asking. "Do you realize how incredibly _against __the __rules_ it is for you—someone who, at the time, wasn't even Jake's girlfriend, an outsider, not Quileute, not _anything_—to _know_ about _us_? The only people that know about the wolves are the members of the council, the pack, and their imprints. That's it, no exceptions, except for _you_. Even Embry's _mom_ doesn't know, or Jake's sisters—and they carry the gene for Christ's sake! The only reason you know is because Jacob found a way to go around Sam's Alpha orders and do what he wanted to do, on _his_ terms. No one else in the pack ever did that. Not even me. So, if I had to bet on someone somehow getting past an imprint...my money would be on Jake."

"Wouldn't you have thought the same of Sam, before it all happened? If you knew, I mean. You two were in love. You were engaged, and Jake and I have barely started dating."

"Sam and I may have been engaged but don't let that make you think what Jake feels for you is less. I wonder if what he feels for you isn't stronger than what Sam feels for Emily. Or what Jared feels for Kim. And no, I wouldn't have thought the same of Sam. He's strong, but he's a rule follower. Jacob marches to the beat of his own drum. Okay, I'm done. I hope you like the pixie look because it's all I was able to do with what was left." Leah brushed away the hair from my shoulders, removed the towel, and helped me out of the chair.

I looked at myself in the mirror. I'd never had short hair before, and the girl staring back at me seemed like a stranger. It wasn't bad, just different.

"Leah, can I ask you something?"

"Something _else_, you mean? Sure, why not?" She replied. She was scowling, but it seemed in jest. I had a feeling she liked talking to me but would never admit it.

"How did you know where to find us?" I asked. Leah didn't answer right away. I sat quietly, waiting for her reply. Finally, she spoke.

"I've jumped off that cliff...before."

"You did? Was that to go after Seth when he jumped?" I asked.

"Is that what he told you?" She chuckled. "He's a good kid. He was protecting me, but I guess we're kind of past secrets now that I've seen you have a completely lunatic moment. Seth's never been there before yesterday, as far as I know. I jumped off that cliff when my father died because I killed him."

"You didn't kill him. He died of a heart attack."

"He had a heart attack because I phased."

"You don't know that."

"Yes I do. He was part of the council. He knew about the wolves and Sam. Seth was young, but his bloodline's strong, so it wasn't a surprise that _he_ phased. Me, on the other hand, I was a different story. There are no legends of girls phasing, and it happened to me right in front of my Dad. He had his heart attack that moment, the very second I phased. You can't convince me that was a coincidence."

She had me there. I was speechless. She had been left by the wayside by her one true love, was responsible for the death of her father, turned into a werewolf—the only female one at that, and now had to share every thought with her ex-fiancé and a bunch of teenage boys. Okay, she won. My life was a bed of roses in comparison. Of course, that didn't help my current situation. And I wasn't surprised my thoughts had drifted back to...me. It was proof of my egocentricity.

Leah snapped me out of my pool of self-pity when she announced, "Okay, I'm done with answering your questions. It's your turn to talk. What the hell are you and my brother up to?"

"You'll have to ask him; I'm only following orders," I answered. Leah moved in front of the mirror, facing me. "What? It's true. _He's_ the one that came to me and said I should run away with him."

"Seth! Get in here!" Leah shouted. Seth walked in with his hands in his pockets, "You are _such_ an ungrateful ass for making me think you were dead. Now tell me what the _hell_ is going on."

"How did you even know where to find me?" he asked, ignoring his sister's request.

"You think I didn't notice exactly _which_ cliff Bella drove off? I'll _never_ forget that cliff, you idiot! There was no way that was a coincidence. And before you ask, the rest of the pack knows nothing. As soon as I 'saw' what happened I phased back and told Sam I was going to go find you, or your body. He tried to stop me but you know me." Leah shrugged.

"Yeah, but how did you know we'd be at this B&B?" Seth persisted.

"I followed your trail," Leah replied matter-of-factly.

"Really? In human form? You can smell that well?"

"Seth, your sense of stealth sucks. Besides the burnt out campfire, Bella's blood and the medical supply scraps buried in a shallow hole at your little secret hiding spot, you went off and trampled your way here. I located every spot where you hitched a ride and every roadside where you got off. Don't worry; I've pretty much covered your trail of garbage."

"You did all that on foot? How'd you get here so fast?" Seth looked genuinely in awe. Leah rolled her eyes.

"You're such a dumb-ass. I drove. Unlike you, _I_ have a driver's license."

"But...then they'll find us. We weren't supposed to use our own cars or anything..."

"No, _Bella_ wasn't supposed to use anyone's car. No such rules applied to me. Besides, I used Sam's truck."'

"Huh? But..."

"I drove Emily and Kim to Emily's sister's place on the Makah reservation until after the battle. Sam won't be anywhere near there for a long time. I told Emily I was taking the truck, and she wash't allowed to tell Sam. She owes me."

"Crap, this means I have to let you in on my plan, doesn't it?"

"Don't worry; I won't take all the credit." Leah stepped around me and walked out of the bathroom. "Come on, we can talk about it over breakfast. I'm starving." From the doorway, I saw the sun spilling in from the window. It was finally dawn and the yellow rays shone brightly as it streamed in past the trees in the distance.

I was stirred from my daze by a ball of clothing that had been thrown at me, hitting me in the face. Leah stood at the doorway again scowling at Seth and me. "By the way, I checked in late last night. I'm in the room just below yours. Bella, you'll be sleeping there with me from now on. I'll meet the two of you downstairs in the dining room."

"We're not..." I began to say as my face flushed. But it was no use. Leah had already left our room, leaving me with Seth standing in uncomfortable silence.

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><p><em>Find out what else Seth has planned in Chapter 12 - Plan of Attack!<em>

_Don't forget to leave a review because I literally live on them!_


	12. Plan of Attack

_For those of you who have been asking about Jake's reaction and how long Bella would be on the lam, this chapter will answer some of those questions_

_Thanks to my beta Love of Escapism from PTB!_

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><p><strong><strong>Chapte<strong>r 12 - Plan of Attack**

Shortly afterwards, we were downstairs eating what at first looked like the largest breakfast ever, but had quickly become a pile of empty plates. Fortunately, Mrs. Brock seemed flattered that Sam and Leah enjoyed her cooking so much.

We were the only guests at Mrs. Brock's this weekend—I suppose the summer rush hadn't hit yet—so we had the whole dining room to ourselves.

"Okay, what's your plan?" Leah asked Seth, after Mrs. Brock went into the kitchen.

"We have to go back to Forks tomorrow," Seth replied. He was looking down at his plate still shovelling food into his mouth and talking in between mouthfuls. "The super-vampires are arriving then, and we're—well actually _I'm_—going to try and take out that Alec guy."

"Yeah, we'll see who'll be taking out whom," Leah interjected.

"Well that was the plan before you arrived. Maybe we can both take him? But it _was_ _my_ idea..."

"Like I said, we'll see," Leah answered sternly.

I looked at them completely dumbfounded. They were talking about facing some of the most dangerous vampires in the world as if they were going for a drive and fighting over who got to sit shotgun.

"How are the two of you going to do this? I mean, if there was a way I'm sure Alice or Carlisle would have known and planned it already," I commented. They both rolled their eyes.

"Look, I get that you've probably seen your precious bloodsuckers in action but, just because you haven't seen _us_ get down and dirty doesn't mean we're incompetent," Leah barked indignantly.

"I...I only meant that Carlisle already knows a lot about them, that's all. I'm sure you're all very...ferocious. I mean, I remember seeing Jake and the others in the meadow going after Laurent," I replied defensively.

"Anyway..." Seth said, "My thought is the only way to take them down is if no one sees it coming, and Alec has to go down first. Once he's out for the count, it'll be smooth sailing for us." I looked at him, a little confused. "Remember how I told you that the rest of the Cullens showed up that night?" Seth asked. I nodded, recalling the fight he told me about between Jacob and Edward. "Well, you should have seen it, Bella. The whole bunch of them—well except Dr. Cullen, because he was in Italy—came right out of the water so fast they created waves. Anyhow, they gave us more details on all the vampires coming and some pointers on fighting them. Dr. Cullen used to live with them more than a hundred years ago and knows a lot about them. Did you know that?"

I nodded. Leah sneered.

"Anyhow, this Alec guy is little and not a fighter, probably can't fight to save his life, but he's got the best super power," Seth related enthusiastically.

"Yes, I was there when Alice told us about it," I said, recalling that night at the beach.

"Yeah, so he's a crappy fighter," Seth continued, "which is why they keep him close to Renata, whose super power is this shield thing. Basically means no one can get hurt if she's protecting them, but they have to be close to her or else it doesn't work."

"Seth, can you stop using words like 'super powers' and 'super vampires'?" I asked. "It's not helping me ease my worries."

"Oh, yeah, sure. So, they told us all about the...guys coming—you know, what time they'd arrive and where they'd be. Carlisle was supposed to come back Sunday morning." Leah nodded, confirming his arrival back in Forks. "So, Aro's probably going to touch Edward first to find out what's happened to you. Then he's going to find out you're Jake's girl, and he's going to touch Jake. Alice couldn't really see exactly how it was going to go down on account of how the wolves were going to be there, but that's what they told us would probably happen. They're counting on there not being a fight at all, which is not what the pack wants, but the Cullens think we'd lose.

"I think, and I'm sure they think this too, that if we take out Alec, we'd have the upper hand because we definitely have the numbers and the fighters. The only fighters they have, minus the super...err...special abilities, are the tracker and the big guy, Felix. But you know, all the wolves, we're fighters, and apparently, Emmett, Jasper and Edward are like all super, oh sorry, expert fighters. Edward, mostly because he can read his opponent's mind so it's kind of hard to get in a hit. That Rosalie girl, too—she sure looks beautiful but darn mean if you ask me. I bet she can really kick butt. She kind of reminds me of Leah."

"Thanks, I think," Leah grumbled, but I could see amusement in her eyes.

Looking at Seth's animated face, with jam smeared to his cheek, and hearing the enthusiasm in his voice, you'd think he was talking about a comic book he had read. Who would have guessed this teenage boy was speaking of real life events?

"Okay, but how are you going to get Alec?" I asked Seth.

"Well, everyone thinks I'm—that _we're_, dead, right?" I nodded in agreement.

"I'm not dead; I'm just a bitter old bitch who ran away," Leah muttered under her breath.

"That means no one's going to be expecting me, or Leah, to appear," Seth continued, ignoring his sister's remark. "We'll try and stick downwind as much as possible and come in human, not phased. That way the pack won't give us away by accident, not that they would, but you never know what Paul might do if he was surprised like that, you know, on account of how he's so impulsive and–"

"Seth, just tell us the plan, don't get sidetracked." Leah was rolling her eyes again.

"Yeah, sorry. Anyhow, even if one of the vampires smell us, I doubt they'd be able to distinguish it from the rest of the pack. There's going to be so many of us there already. The only one we can't hide from is Edward, and I'm counting on that. Do you know if he can read minds even if someone isn't right in front of him?"

I nodded and answered, "He can read minds up to a couple of miles away, but it depends on how well he knows them, and if he's heard their thoughts before."

"Oh, I didn't think his range was that far. And he's heard our thoughts before. We'll have to work out positioning more carefully. Anyhow, Edward will read our thoughts when we make our way in. I'll tell him, in my head of course, that Leah and I are here and we're going to take out Alec, but he's going to have to somehow get Aro away from him for a split second. I'm hoping Edward can come up with something, and then we'll phase, leap out, and take out Alec. Hopefully, everyone else'll jump in and take out the rest after that." Seth went back to slathering butter and jam onto biscuits and eating them whole.

"Seth, that sounds like a suicide mission." I couldn't imagine how anyone was going to come out of this alive. As soon as he and Leah attacked Alec, the Vulturi would all be after them, especially Alec's twin sister Jane, who I remembered also had a special ability. But Seth shrugged nonchalantly and continued to eat. Leah sat silently, looking deep in thought.

My only hope was that Edward would jump to their aid in time. He would know in advance what the plan was, and he was fast. I was going to try to convince them not to go, but I knew they wouldn't be talked out of it. They were going to do this to save the pack—their friends and 'brothers'. I wasn't going to remain in hiding anymore. I'd stand with them.

"I want to go with you." It was a statement, not a request. I refused to be the coward in hiding anymore.

"No way, Bella. It's no place for a girl," Seth replied. Leah snorted. "Well, you know what I mean, for a _regular_ girl. Besides, if I brought you, Jake would kill me."

_If __you're __not __dead __already_, I thought to myself.

"Jake's not going to kill you, or me, for that matter," Leah commented. She looked over at me before continuing, "But Seth's right. It's no place for you."

I reached out and grabbed her hand, making her stop eating for a moment. "I love those people, too. If everything goes right, then no one will notice my presence. I'll stay 'downwind' like you said you were going to do. If everything goes wrong, then I have to be there. Imagine if it were you? Would you wait around somewhere else, doing nothing, while the people you loved got killed?" Leah looked at me with what I thought was a fleeting moment of empathy, but it faded quickly and she didn't answer me. "You _need_ me," I added, as a new thought occurred.

"Yeah, how do you figure that?" Leah snickered.

"What if you show up and it happens to be while Aro's touching Edward? We know what day the Volturi are showing up but not exactly what time and _when_ Aro will be reading everyone's thoughts." That erased Leah's smug grin as she and Seth both scrunched their faces.

"Okay, you've got a point, but exactly what are you going to do to help us?" Leah wasn't convinced I was capable of anything worthwhile, yet. In all honesty, I wasn't sure if I would ever be useful in the constant conflicts of super naturals around me.

"Edward can't read _my_ mind. I can go first, check things out and then signal to you when it's safe."

"And how do you expect to do that? You _do_ realize everyone has heightened senses. They'll hear anything electronic and it's not like you can exactly shout out to us or anything. That's assuming you can hike out to the site on your own, undetected, and in one piece. From what I understand, we have to be pretty far away to insure Edward doesn't hear _our_ thoughts." Leah had a point. As usual, I hadn't thought out all the details. It was deflating to constantly be berated by Leah. She already intimidated me, and proving me incompetent wasn't making anything better.

"This can work," Seth spoke up, coming to my rescue. "_We_ can get Bella out there well ahead of time so she doesn't have to find her way on her own. I'm sure if we put our heads together we can think of some way for her to signal us that won't be detected by everyone else."

Leah sat back in her chair with her arms crossed in front of her. "When you come up with something, let me know. I won't be holding my breath, though. In the meantime, I say we plan to take our chances and ambush them." Leah went back to her breakfast but Seth did not. He ignored his sister's remarks and sat, deep in thought.

I tried to think of something too, but Leah was right. Creating a signal seemed impossible. How would I be able to call for the Clearwaters without a bunch of vampires noticing? It seemed hopeless, and just as I was about to succumb to tears of frustration Seth smiled and slammed his hand down on the table.

"I've got it!" We both looked up at him. I was anxious and hopeful, while Leah raised an eyebrow doubtfully.

"We've got to get some sort of animal, maybe birds or something, that'll stand out in the forest but not so much that the super vamps will take notice," Seth stated.

"Yeah? What's she going to do, release a bunch of white doves like some friggin' wedding?"

"Actually, yes, but not doves... That'll be too obvious. It has to be something you and I can detect from a distance but won't seem out of place for the Volturi. Hmmm..." I looked at Seth with intense hope, _willing_ him to come up with something. Leah looked irritated as she tapped her fingers on the tabletop.

"Seagulls!" Seth shouted. Leah and I raised our eyebrows. "There're plenty of seagulls around on the coast but the meeting place is partway up the mountains. It won't seem too weird seeing and hearing seagulls on the Olympic Peninsula, but up there it would be unusual for anyone familiar with the area."

"So let me get this straight," Leah said, "your plan is for us to take Swan lake over here up near the site beforehand, hope she survives the night on her own with a bunch of captured seagulls that are going to be squawking the whole time, and then have her release them without making a noise?"

"Yep."

"You're nuts."

"No, I can do it, really." It didn't sound pleasant, but not too difficult. I could wait quietly, and seagulls didn't scare me. Leah still looked doubtful. "As long as you two help me get to the site, I'll be fine. We can find something to hold the seagulls in that doesn't have a noisy latch or anything."

"Okay, assuming this signal thing works, that still doesn't solve all our problems. We have to be pretty far off to make sure Edward can't hear our thoughts, and we'll be human. They'll be a delay between signal and arrival. How long do you think it'll take us to run up there human, at least a couple of minutes? Maybe more, depending on how far out we have to be." Leah wasn't forgetting any details. As pessimistic as she was, I was happy to have her with us. I knew if she agreed to whatever plan we came up with, it would be pretty well thought out.

"Look, after I signal you, why don't you come to the sight phased? That way you can be there really fast and it's not like Edward's going to give you away. The pack will hear your thoughts but I doubt any twitches will be looked upon as suspicious by the Volturi. They don't know enough about the wolves to determine what it would mean and none of the pack will be able to speak when they're phased anyway. Even if Paul—or someone else—did something, it might distract them and maybe no one will notice Edward getting Alec to move away from the shield." Leah sat back contemplating what I had said. I was hopeful because she didn't squash my ideas the moment I voiced them.

"Makes sense. Okay, you can be there," Leah conceded. "We'll have to do something to cover up your scent, but we can deal with that later." I nodded and Leah shrugged. "If we're all going to die, you might as well be there, too."

"In case we don't die, can you put in a good word for us with Jake?" Seth asked.

"Uh...sure, but why?"

"You know, for bringing you to the fight. Ask him not to kill us or anything," Seth replied, not quite as jokingly as I would have hoped.

"Seth, I already told you, Jake is _not_ going to kill us," Leah answered before I could. "It'd be kind of pathetic if he took us _both_ down on his own, especially now."

I turned sharply towards Leah who now had a look of regret on her face. She hadn't meant to tell us that, or at least not me.

"What do you mean 'especially now'?" I asked, afraid to hear the answer.

"Crap," Leah shrugged her shoulders and continued anyway. "You would've found out anyway. After the two of you 'died' Jake had an...episode." I raised an eyebrow, unsure what to say. "He freaked out, okay? He went to your leech and they had it out—again."

My hand went to my mouth and tears formed in my eyes.

"Don't get all worked up. He's fine. The rest of the Cullens broke it up before anything serious happened, but Jake's not going to be able to use his right arm for a few days. It was shattered in more places than you have teeth. Dr. Fang performed surgery on it in their house. They've pretty much got an entire operating room set up there. Anyhow, the only problem is he shouldn't phase until it's healed, or absolutely necessary." Leah went back to her breakfast.

I waited a long time in silence before I worked up the nerve to ask my next question.

"What about Edward?"

"He almost got killed. He was ready to let Jake take him out because, apparently, he 'cannot exist in a world without Bella,'" Leah answered, using air quotes.

"Oh."

"Don't worry; he was fixed up good as new by Dr. Fang, too. No parts were lost, permanently. Anyhow, it's probably better if you came along after all. Jake's going to be completely useless if there's a fight, unless you're around to need protecting. Probably your leech-y ex will need the extra incentive, too. Right now, both of them just want to crawl into a hole and die—after they kill each other, of course." Leah rolled her eyes and took a large sip of coffee. "The two of them have been moping around like pansy-assed girls."

After breakfast, we spent the rest of the morning hanging around in the woods by a stream talking about our plans. A lot of it centered on how to disguise or hide my scent. For most of my life, my personal odor had never been worth noting; however, since my arrival in Forks, it seemed to be the primary subject of discussion more often than not.

Neither of the Clearwaters felt sitting downwind was enough. The wind could change direction and everyone had heightened senses. Both of them agreed that I had to scrub myself clean with unscented cleanser (the harsher the better), clothe myself in rain gear, and cover myself with anything 'natural'. Seth left soon after lunch to get the supplies for my smell retardant, which left me and Leah sitting in the woods together, just the two of us.

At first, we didn't talk. We stared at the stream as Leah tossed pebbles into it every once in a while.

"So, you don't talk much, do you, Swan?" Leah finally asked.

"No. I guess you don't either, Clearwater," I replied, making Leah smile.

"What's so funny?" I asked.

"You're a swan, sitting by clear water. Just found it amusing."

"Sounds right. I'm a stupid bird that people have been eating for centuries, and you get to be the life force for all living things on earth."

"Shit, are you still on your 'I'm a horrible person' kick? Well, if you're going to try and off yourself again, don't do it on my watch."

"I wasn't trying to 'off myself'. I don't know what I was doing, to tell you the truth. I guess...I was hoping I could change. I wanted to be someone different, someone who made people's lives better."

"What makes you think you don't make anyone's life better?"

"What makes you think I do?"

"Because I can read Jake's mind."

"Jake doesn't know everything."

"No one knows everything. It doesn't mean people aren't happy because of you."

"Like who? How?"

Leah rolled her eyes.

"Christ, you irritate me. I'll tell you, but I don't want to, and if you ever tell anyone I was nice to you I'll kick your ass. Charlie's happy because you decided to come live here. Jake's happy because he's in love with who he thinks is the greatest girl in the whole world, and she loves him back. If it weren't for you, his life would revolve around being poor, motherless, and disenfranchised. Oh yeah, and turning into a big, hairy wolf—which he hates almost as much as me. But, now, with you in his life, he feels like he can do anything—at least he did while he thought you were alive. Even that damn leech of yours was happy because of you. He lived for what—a hundred years without getting laid? Even though he didn't have you, he finally fell in love and felt like there was a reason to exist. That is, until you and Seth pulled your stunt."

"How do you know what Edward thinks?" It sounded like it could be true, but Leah was the last person I expected to have insight on Edward.

"I know everything Jake knows, and everything else I can figure out because I'm not some idiot teenage boy. I saw your bloodsucker on the beach that night, and I saw the look on his face whenever your name came up. Sure, he wishes you were with him, but he'd rather you be alive and with Jacob than not exist at all. Christ, you even make my dumb brother happy because you're a senior, he thinks you're pretty, and you happen to pay attention to him. It makes me want to hurl."

"Oh." Neither of us said anything else. Leah obviously wasn't uncomfortable enough with the silence to make small talk, and I was never good at doing things like that. After several minutes, I decided I couldn't sit here indefinitely without saying anything.

"So, what's it like being a wolf?"

"Really? That's what you're going to ask me? Hasn't Jake already told you everything you want to know?"

"I guess. But it must be different for you, because you're a girl." Leah went quiet and looked into the distance.

"It's not natural. Not that any of this is natural, but it's even less so for me. The guys, they imprint and are supposed to pass on the wolf gene. Me? I don't get my period anymore. I'm a genetic dead end. I have no future."

"You don't know that. Maybe it's only temporary, and it'll go back to normal once you stop phasing. How do you know you won't imprint? They don't know anything about girls being wolves."

"If I could have children, or imprint, or anything like that, Sam would have imprinted on me. Some think imprinting exists to keep the bloodlines strong, and no other girl has stronger bloodlines than me. Well, I guess there are Jake's sisters, but they're not around. The fact that Sam didn't imprint on me tells me I can't have children. Funny, I never thought much about kids until I found out I couldn't have any."

"I don't think any of that is set in stone," I replied quietly, unsure if I really believed what I said.

"So, what about you?" Leah asked. I was confused.

"What about me?"

"Do you want kids?"

"Oh. I never really thought about it. When I was with Edward, it wasn't a possibility. At the time I would have been happy just to have been with him and the Cullens, forever."

"And now?"

"I'm not sure...about kids I mean."

"Yeah, I'm sure that's the only thing you're not sure about," Leah answered sarcastically.

"The only reason I'm not sure is because..." I stopped, not certain if I wanted to share _this_ much.

"Because what?"

"I don't know. If I tell you, Jake'll know, too. If he finds out, it should be from me."

Leah shrugged. "Up to you. It's not like I care one way or the other." Somehow, her indifference made me want to tell her more. She was the closest thing I had to a girlfriend right now, and I could _really_ confide in her. There were no secrets I _had_ to keep from _her_.

"Edward told me he'd be waiting for me until the day I died. He said he'd take me no matter how old I was, or what I had done with my life. It makes me feel guilty. People aren't supposed to have safety nets like that, but there's nothing I can do about it. I can't make him take it back."

"Well, isn't that just perfect! You've got Mr. white-hot money-bags eternity ready and waiting to save you from cancer, poverty and imprinting. How do you get these guys?" Leah wasn't laughing. She was bitter.

"Is that what you think of me? Do you _really_ think all those superficial things matter to me?"

"What things?"

"You know, money, looks, that sort of stuff."

"Look, it's easy to _say_ none of that's important, but no one will believe you. Would you have fallen so hard for Edward so fast if he didn't look like that?" I was ashamed. She was right. I was dazzled by Edward's beauty. I still was, and I often thought of how he looked and compared myself to him. A lot of who Edward was to me was defined by his beauty.

"But I don't care about him being rich."

"Yeah, you can tell me that once you've been poor, _really_ poor. See if you believe that after you're stuck living out on the rez with three kids, no money and a house falling down on top of you. Let me know how important money is when you have to take hand-me-downs from strangers to put clothes on your children's backs, and they have to wear shoes that don't fit properly. Let me know how important money is when you have to let go of all your dreams because no one has the money for college, or you can't go anywhere to find a job because you can't afford a car."

"Leah, you're not that badly off." I knew no one on the reservation was rich, but the Clearwaters had a reasonably comfortable life.

"No, we're not that badly off, financially. But there are many who are and let me tell you, they care about money. If Jake stays in La Push, with the pack, taking care of Billy, he'll never be more than he is now. He'd be lucky if he got around to getting his mechanic's license. If you were with him, you'd never go on any glamorous holidays or have fancy dinners. You'd end up barefoot and pregnant, taking care of Jake, Billy, a bunch of brats, and a creaky old house that won't nearly be big enough.

"If you were with Cullen you'd get to see every damn library, museum and art gallery you've ever heard of. You'd be able to visit the setting for every book you've ever read and have the time and money to study anything you wanted to, forever. You can't convince me that's not a factor. If it isn't, you haven't thought hard enough about it."

"I don't want to be with anyone because they dazzle me or they're rich."

Leah raised an eyebrow at me and asked, "Dazzled?"

"Never mind," I replied, not wanting to talk about the spell Edward had be under.

"Okay, whatever. Anyhow, who said you were with anyone because they were rich or...'dazzling'? You love both of them, don't you?" I nodded. "Then whoever you're with, you've chosen because you love him. The rest is just...condiments. Sorry, couldn't think of another analogy. All I'm saying is if you don't know who you love more, better, whatever, then it's all this crappy, politically incorrect shit you have to consider. Really, what else is left?"

"The way you talk, it sounds like you think I made the wrong choice. You make it sound like I should be with Edward."

"I never said that. Personally, I wouldn't choose him. Not that you and I have anything in common..."

"Why not? Well, other than him being a vampire and you being a wolf."

"What's the point in living forever if you can't ever have any new friends or close relationships? Forever is pretty damn long to spend with the same seven people. And I'd like to have children, or at least the option to. The bloodsuckers can't even adopt real kids because they never age. They can't set down roots anywhere, and even with all their money, they have to hide in the dark and under cloud cover. From what I can see, their lives are a mix between superficial monotony and constantly being on the lam.

"They don't even seem to have any motivation. Well, except for Dr. Fang, I guess. Honestly, what have most of them done with all those years of existence? Did any of them do anything spectacular? Have they done some wonderful thing to help starving children, the environment, civil wars, or political unrest? Anything? From where I stand, all they've done is burn gas driving around in ostentatious cars and change clothes like they're facial tissues. Sounds like a hollow life if I've ever seen one. And I haven't even touched on the part where you have to live like a crack addict who can never have her fix but has to constantly hang around an easily accessible supply. Yeah, that sounds fun."

I was feeling uncomfortable with the direction the conversation was going. Leah was brutally honest. She didn't focus on the romantic notion of true love and happily ever after the way I had. She brought to light the mundane, everyday necessities of existence. It spoiled the vision I had always held of being happy forever as long as you found your true love. I shouldn't have been surprised; after all, she had found _her_ true love and it hadn't ended happily ever after.

"What about you, Leah? What are you going to do, now?" I asked, both to redirect the conversation, and because I genuinely wanted to know.

"I'm not sure what, exactly. I definitely don't want to be running around with this pack for much longer. I don't know how long it'll take before I have enough control to stop phasing for good, but I want to do it soon. I'm also going to leave La Push the first chance I get. I'll never be able to get my life together again, here. Maybe I'll go to college, or get a job somewhere. I don't know for sure yet." She threw another pebble in the stream.

"I don't get it. When Jacob first started phasing he said he was 'in it for life' but then later, he said something about leaving La Push too, and now _you're_ talking that way. What do the two of you know that I don't?"

"You're just going to force every secret out of me, aren't you?" Leah smiled as she said this. "I can leave because Sam won't stop me. He still loves me and is burdened by guilt. I'm sure you know how that feels." I shifted uncomfortably at being compared to Sam. "Jacob...his story's different. He's supposed to be the true Alpha, not Sam." I looked up at her in surprise. Why hadn't Jacob said anything to me about it? "Jacob's the direct descendent of Ephraim Black, the last chief and Alpha wolf. He declined being Alpha, for now, but it's his by birth."

"Jacob's supposed to be the chief or something?"

"Yeah, something like that. But you know him; he doesn't like being forced into anything. He's all about free will and choosing to do what he wants. It won't be long, though until he gives in. I can feel his presence changing already. He's as big as Sam and soon he'll be bigger. He's also getting more rebellious and argumentative with Sam and his decisions. It's not in his nature to take orders from a Uley. Hell, it's not even in _my_ nature to take orders from a Uley. Next to Jacob, Seth and I have the strongest blood lines. Sam was just the oldest and the first to phase."

At that moment I felt a little sorry for Sam. How difficult it must be for him to be stuck with a role he was never meant for, and that others were able to claim and take away from him. I wondered what this meant for Jacob as well. Did it mean he'd have to be a wolf forever? And what would that mean for me?

Leah and I didn't talk anymore. I had nothing more to say, and she seemed content to toss pebbles into the river indefinitely. We waited in silence until Seth returned.

I was relieved to see him. Although it was nice to be able to confide in another girl, the conversation was much more intense than I had anticipated. The air was heavy with discomfort. Seth's presence lifted that dark cloud and brought us back to the task at hand.

Right away, Leah and Seth started chattering right away about my scent concealing strategy as though I wasn't there. They both decided I needed more to ensure I wasn't detected and informed me I would have to cover myself in something with a _strong_ natural scent. I thought this meant pine needles or something... If only that were the case.

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><p><em>Thanks for reading, and reviews are always appreciated!<em>


	13. Participant

_Thanks to Love of Escapism from Project Team Beta for beta'ing this chapter for me!_

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><p><strong>Chapter 13 - Participant<strong>

I sat in my hiding spot, above the clearing, about as uncomfortable as a person could possibly get. The drying, generic, unscented bar of soap used to wash both my hair and body made me itchy, but that was bearable. Being covered in cheap, plastic raingear from head to toe that didn't allow my skin to breathe was irritating, but at least it kept me warm in the wind. These things were bearable. It was the Clearwaters' solution to making me smell more "natural" that I made a real stink about, no pun intended.

They smeared animal feces, yes, actual animal poop, all over me! I tried hard to put my foot down with that one, but they wouldn't listen to me. They pretty much went ahead and did it while I was still talking! I was literally strong-armed into getting covered in...shit! I had to give them credit though; they didn't crack a single joke—not even Leah. They never laughed at me or even smirked. They were both very respectful. I was pretty sure that anyone else in the pack would've _never_ let me hear the end of it for months to come.

I had been here since about midnight, and it wasn't quite dawn yet, but there was enough light for me to see. I was perched uphill from the meeting site, with a pile of blankets that I had slept on (it was sprayed by a skunk, again to cover up my scent. Between that and my feces covered attire, I did _not_ end up having a very restful sleep) and five large canvas bags containing one seagull each. Seth had fed them tons of food the night before and put them in the bags. He told me they should be pretty quiet as long as they were in the dark. I kept the bags as far from me as possible. Something about them gave me the creeps.

I had a good view of the events below, but I was too far away to hear what anyone said. I could see the Cullens and the pack in the clearing. All but three of them were lying still. The pack were all in wolf form except for Jacob, who looked very vulnerable lying motionless on the ground with his arm in a brace. The motionless wolves and vampires almost looked dead, except their eyes were open and every once in a while I could see a body twitch or move slightly. The only ones standing and alert were Edward, Alice, Carlisle, and the visitors.

I was pretty sure I knew who most of them were. I recognized Victoria right away, and the vampire next to her must have been Riley. In the center among them was a very pale vampire with jet black hair. He stood with an air of authority, and there was a female directly behind him, who seemed to cling to him. She followed his every step, like his shadow. I gathered this was Aro and his shield Renata.

Close by, on either side of him, were two small vampires that looked like they were barely teenagers when they were turned. They looked similar, but one was a boy and the other a girl. I was pretty sure these were the twins, Alec and Jane. There was also one extremely large male, even bigger than Emmett. That must have been Felix. The last one was tall and lean. He must have been the tracker, Demetri.

A few minutes ago—when they first arrived—Carlisle stepped forward to speak, then Edward. Aro took Edward's hand, presumably to read his thoughts. Afterwards, Aro looked over at Jacob and said something. Jacob said something back to him. From the expression on his face, it was not a compliment. It was at this point that Aro made some casual gesture with his hand. Alec stood at attention when he did this and looked at the Cullens and wolves. Slowly, everyone began to fall. Aro turned and muttered something to Alec and that's when Edward, Alice and Carlisle were awoken.

Now, I was waiting to see what Aro was going to do next, hoping his turn at touching Edward was over. I saw him walk over to Alice and knew he'd be very intrigued at reading her mind. I tried not to make any decisions during this time. I didn't even let myself think about mundane tasks as I stared intently at the scene below. The wolves were close by, but I wasn't sure if they were close enough to block me from her visions. The Clearwaters had placed me far enough so the vampires would hopefully be unable to distinguish my heartbeat from those of the animals in the forest, if it could be heard at all from where they stood.

A few short minutes passed, and Aro was still holding Alice's hand. He lifted his other hand and began stroking hers with it, longingly. I saw a look of fear pass Alice's face, and Edward glared at Aro. That's when Aro moved to the other side to kneel down and reach for Jacob's limp hand. I put my hand over my mouth to prevent myself from gasping. Aro's face looked amused as he appeared to chuckle and glance back and forth from Edward to Jacob. He let go of Jacob and started speaking to some of the others of his group, obviously amused by what he had learned.

At this point, I was pretty sure he was done with Edward, Jacob and Alice—as far as the mind reading was concerned. He'd already read every thought they'd ever had; what more was there to learn from them? He was also unlikely to touch any of the other members of the pack since they shared most of their thoughts with each other. I decided to let the gulls go. Quickly, I untied the leather straps and opened the bags, releasing them.

At first they just hopped around causing me to panic. I gave each of them a little nudge, but nothing happened. Finally, I slapped one. That did it. It tried to attack me, and it took all the effort I had not to scream out loud. I just kept silently flailing my arms, and eventually, all of them took flight.

None of the Volturi took note of the flying birds. The wolves, who may have taken note of seagulls in the mountains, were all unconscious and Edward briefly glanced toward the birds out of the corner of his eye but quickly redirected his gaze to the events in front of him. That's when I noticed a slight movement in Edward's face. It lasted a split second, and no one else noticed. Carlisle stood over to the side and didn't have a good view of Edward. Aro was still intrigued by what he had seen in Jacob's mind and was speaking to the others, oblivious of the Cullens. The rest of the Volturi looked at Aro, listening to his amused banter. Even if the guard had seen Edward, they didn't know him well enough to read his expressions like I could. I knew that look. It was a look of surprise and relief.

Edward looked out into the tree line, just behind Alec. I knew this meant Seth and Leah had arrived and were hiding there. He looked intently into the forest, and bowed his head slightly, almost in a half nod. Edward slowly moved to his left, holding onto Alice's elbow so she moved with him. He was a little further away from Alec and he appeared to have whispered something to Alice.

Suddenly, her face became a blank, as she stood in a trance like state. Edward made an exaggerated movement to turn towards her, fixing his gaze upon her. All conscious eyes turned to the two of them.

That's when it all happened. It was nearly too fast for my human eyes, like a series of flashing lights. Everyone moved quickly, and much of it happened simultaneously, but I saw it all, as if it transpired in slow motion. I'm not sure how I was able to take in all the events, knowing now that barely a few minutes had passed.

Believing she was foreseeing an important event, Aro immediately appeared next to Alice, reaching to touch her. Renata never let go of Aro and remained directly behind him. Jane was also at their side, since they moved to Aro's right, and that was where she had been standing. In the confusion, Alec, whose path was obstructed by Jacob's unconscious form, was still in his original spot but turned to catch up to them. Aro and Alec were only separated for a split second, but in that split second, Seth and Leah leaped out of the trees and onto Alec.

I saw two wolves flash out of the forest and land on the small, boyish vampire. The first thing to make contact was Leah's sharp teeth on Alec's neck. Almost at the same time, Seth's teeth took hold of his head. The moment the two wolves landed, everyone woke up, and Jane turned to Seth, who immediately crumpled to the ground with Alec's head, now separated from his body, still in his mouth. As he crumpled, Felix ran toward Leah, grabbed her, crushing her body. He threw the grey wolf to the ground. He then took hold of the sandy wolf just as Edward flew in. Edward's sudden hit made Felix lose his grip on Seth. Seth and Leah had both phased back into their human forms. Leah lay unconscious and Seth was writhing and screaming in pain, an awful mess of blood and contorted limbs.

Edward never got more than the one hit on Felix as he suddenly dropped to the ground, now Jane's new target. Felix began pulling, mangling and biting Edward all at once, nearly at the same time that Jasper and Emmett attacked. I saw half an arm come flying out of that conflict just before Emmett fell to the ground, as Jane's deathly glare redirected to him.

Alice ran after Demetri a split second before everyone was released from Alec's trance, before Demetri had even turned to run. This allowed her to catch up to him quickly. I saw them fight in flashes of swinging arms and legs. I couldn't tell who was winning.

Carlisle, meanwhile, ran to Edward and Leah. He ignored the writhing, suffering Emmett choosing to quickly to something to Leah instead. Esme arrived right behind him and took Leah into the woods. Carlisle then straightened out the parts of Edward that looked to me like they were bent the wrong way. Edward was barely moving and his skin was marred and cracked.

As all this happened on the Cullen side, the pack, on the other side of Aro, jumped up in high alert the moment Seth and Leah took down Alec. Jacob—still human—ran to Seth, who was on the ground writhing in agony. He picked him up, and ran into the tree line towards Esme.

The black wolf pounced on the whirling blur that I knew was Jasper and Felix. In seconds, Sam and Jasper were tearing the giant vampire apart, throwing pieces of his body into a pile. A chocolate wolf, likely Quil, was after Victoria, with Rosalie running alongside to him. A dark silver wolf took down Riley. The other two wolves advanced toward Aro and his entourage, but as soon as they were near, they stopped and walked away. Eventually, the two wolves turned around and circled Aro and his little group, like sharks circling their prey, except they seemed to be unable to get closer.

Victoria, Rosalie and Quil were gone from view. They were in the woods somewhere. It was impossible to know how far away they were by now. Suddenly, I was very aware of how vulnerable and alone I was.

Edward looked mostly straightened out but still lay motionless, as Carlisle dragged him in the direction Esme had gone with Leah. Jasper, now that Felix was destroyed, ran to Alice and Demetri. The battle there stopped a moment after Jasper's arrival, with Alice and Jasper standing over a dismembered, beheaded Demetri.

That's when I heard something rustle.

"Bella." It was Jacob. His arm was still in a brace and his eyes were moist. His face filled with relief as he fell to the ground onto his knees. I ran to him and wrapped my arms around his head, pulling it into my body.

"Shhh... I'm here Jake," I whispered.

"Bella." Jacob looked up at me, unable to speak at first. We spoke with our eyes. There was no need for words. I knew the pain Jacob had been relieved of, just as he knew the anxiety that had overwhelmed me up until this moment.

"You look cute with the new hair, but you smell like shit," Jacob said with a grin.

"It's a long story," I replied, rolling my eyes.

"I still love you."

"Gee, thanks."

It was at this moment I was suddenly thrown yards away by a warm, furry form. I landed hard in the brush. Jake was not in front of me anymore. In his stead was the giant russet wolf. He seemed larger, more formidable than I remembered. He lunged forward in a flash of fur, gingerly avoiding the use of one of his front paws. In front of him was a white blur closing the distance at a tremendous speed. The blur was topped with a flash of orange-red.

Jake and Victoria fought in quick movements, making it impossible for me to focus on what was happening. I barely made out Victoria's glinting teeth as Jacob rolled and twisted to avoid them. They danced their violent blur of twirls until a white arm flew out of the struggle. I was hopeful Jacob would kill Victoria until a loud, painful howl resounded. The memory of that sound would never be lost to me. Jacob fell and phased instantly to his human form. He writhed in pain as Victoria advanced with her mouth lowered to his thigh.

I don't know how he found the strength, but as Victoria's teeth bit into his flesh, Jacob darted up and sank his teeth into her neck, while his good hand pulled her head back at a grotesque, unnatural angle. She screamed making a piece of Jacob's flesh fall out of her mouth. Jacob grabbed her head with both hands now and bit down again and again. Eventually, her head fell to the ground, separated from her body. I thought it was over until I saw Jacob collapse and start convulsing.

I ran to him. By the time I got there his wound had already started to close. I was in a panic. If I thought too much about it, I knew the smell of blood would make me faint, but I had to save Jacob. Remembering Seth's story of Jacob being bitten on the beach, I frantically searched for something sharp, anything. I looked at Victoria's flinching body and noticed her belt. It had a very large buckle with a sharp clasp. I took it off and dug it into Jacob's skin, re-opening his wound. I had to hold it open with my fingers to prevent it from closing again. I was going to try and suck out the venom when I remembered the burning that James's bite had caused me. I didn't know if getting it in my mouth would be the same, but if it happened, I'd be useless to Jacob. Instead, I began squeezing the flesh around the opening, trying to make him bleed. I did what I could to make him turn to his side, but he was heavy and barely conscious. I sat on his leg, pounding it with my fists between squeezes, hoping it would bring more blood to the surface. I had no idea what I was doing, but I _had_ to try something, anything.

Jacob shook and turned a ghastly pale grey. He looked like he would explode and the skin around the wound burned under my hand and swelled at an alarming rate. I was too weak to make a significant difference. The most I could do was keep the wound open. Eventually, I collapsed on top of Jacob, as tears mixed with his blood, as my hands squeezed his wound between fits of hysterical sobbing. I didn't notice someone else had come upon us until a cold hand pushed me aside. I looked up and saw Rosalie.

"Did he get bitten, again?" she asked. I nodded. Rosalie looked from Jacob to me, as though contemplating what to do.

"Please Rosalie... I love him. I don't have the strength to get the venom out. If there's anything I can ever do for you I will, no matter what, if you'll save Jacob. I'm _begging_ you, please!" I grabbed her arms, lifting myself up on my knees, pleading as I've never pleaded before.

"I _can't __believe_ I'm stuck doing this for that damn dog, _again_! I expect reparations for this!" Rosalie pushed me aside, held the wound open with her fingers and brought her lips to the gaping hole in Jacob's leg. She started sucking out the venom along with Jacob's blood. At first, I was relieved Rosalie was helping, and I started to notice Jacob's convulsions were subsiding. He was still unconscious, but he was starting to look better. That's when I started to panic again.

Rosalie didn't stop, and Jacob's lips started to turn blue. His breathing slowed and the rest of his body began to feel cool. He was starting to decline again.

"Stop! Rosalie, that's enough! You have to stop!" I was afraid, but then I remembered the rest of Seth's account and knew Rosalie was in control. Finally, she stopped and ran to the nearest bush where she regurgitated what I assumed was the blood she had drained from Jacob. It was a lot. Under any other circumstance, I would have been unconscious from the sight and smell of it.

"I think it's all gone now. I'll never get this taste out of my mouth. Sucking rats would be better than this." She turned away from me to spit into the bushes again. Rosalie wasn't just vomiting, she was shaking. If I didn't know better, I would say she was ill. "God! It took so damn long for all the venom to come out this time. How long was he lying here between getting bitten and my arrival?"

"I don't know, a few minutes?" I shrugged, unsure of the passage of time. I noticed Rosalie's face looked...odd. "Rosalie, are you okay?"

"Yes, I think. I feel a little strange... I suppose I'm spent. It's been so long since I've felt that way." Rosalie fell down into a sitting position. "The dog's blood did not settle well with me, but it's mostly out of my system. I guess two times in the span of three days is just too much. It shouldn't be surprising, I suppose, that their blood is bad for us, considering our venom is poisonous to them."

I leaned over Jacob, stroking his hair and forehead as Rosalie coughed up more blood, when I heard a low growl. It was the chocolate wolf. I looked at my surroundings and saw what he must be seeing. Rosalie was covered in blood, especially around her mouth. Jacob lay unconscious with an obvious wound on his leg. Without thinking, I ran in front of Rosalie, facing the giant wolf with my palms held up.

"Quil, stop! Don't!" It was too late. He had already lunged for the blond vampire. I jumped towards him, trying to stop his advance. The best I did was get knocked over, falling on top of Rosalie. It wasn't much, but it made Quil stop. I think he was afraid he had hurt me because I had fallen hard enough that you could hear a loud thud. I grit my teeth and tried to take my mind off the pain as I tried to speak again.

"Quil, Victoria bit Jacob. Rosalie saved him by sucking the venom out."

The wolf backed up slowly, looking from Rosalie to Jacob. I knew he was listening for Jacob's heartbeat and once he was satisfied, Quil phased to his human form. He ran to Jacob, knelt next to him, feeling his skin and putting a hand over his heart. He looked up at Rosalie.

"Thank you...and...uh...sorry about that."

Rosalie waved a hand at him as she coughed up another mouthful of blood. Quil looked over at me questioningly.

"Too much wolf blood's not good for vampires it seems." Quil broke out into a wide grin, lifted Jacob up in his arms and nodded over to Rosalie.

"Are you okay to get Bella away?" Rosalie nodded in response. "I'm taking him to Dr. Fa...I mean to Dr. Cullen." Quil left with Jacob as Rosalie rubbed the inside of her mouth with her fingers.

"So, how did you end up here? I thought you were dead." She spoke without looking directly at me.

"Seth sort of ran away with me and planned everything. I had to be the signal to let him know the coast was clear to attack because Edward can't hear me. You know, just in case Aro was touching him or something."

"Ah. Well at least your presence stopped Edward from throwing himself at Aro, begging to be killed."

"What are you talking about? Why would Edward want Aro to kill him?"

"Don't tell me you're that stupid..." Rosalie rolled her eyes and offered nothing more. I was getting really miffed by all these women calling me stupid. Maybe Seth _was_ right. Perhaps Leah and Rosalie _were_ a lot alike after all. "He's in love with you. Not just in love, but completely obsessed. He's decided he can't exist in a world without you." I remembered this was not the first time I had heard those words. "It's Edward's usual melodramatic way of dealing with his lot in life." Rosalie rolled her eyes, then changed the subject. "Come on. In case you haven't noticed, there's a battle going on down there, and I've got to get you out of here."

Rosalie made quick work of tearing what remained of Victoria into several pieces before igniting the pile of vampire parts. Once that was done, she bent over so I could climb on her back. I did so gingerly, not completely comfortable in her company.

"I can't decide what smells worse, all those damn mutts or you." Before I could offer an answer we were whipping through the forest at speeds I had almost forgotten about.

It didn't take us long to get to our destination. It was a spot deep in the forest that had been set up like a medical center. I guess they had anticipated casualties. Carlisle and Esme were there tending to Jacob, Leah, Seth and Edward.

Edward was lying still with his eyes closed. His clothes had mostly been taken off and what remained had been torn in several places. I could see cracks and fissures where his body had been twisted, warped, and then put back in place. Some had closed in, while others looked like they were on the mend. He was as still as a statue and didn't look up to acknowledge my presence. One of the deepest fissures was on his neck.

Leah lay bruised, swollen, cut, and obviously broken, but she was conscious and aware of her surroundings. She cried out in pain as Carlisle tended to various limbs on her body. He was re-breaking bones that had healed before he could ensure they were properly set.

Esme was setting Seth's leg. Seth looked fine, other than his leg, but he was hooked up to tubing that ran from him to Jacob.

Jacob was unconscious and pale. He wasn't as bad as he had been a few minutes ago, but he wasn't great either. He lay wearing cut off track pants that appeared too tight on him and Seth was in his underwear. I guess Seth was kind enough to relinquish his pants to Jacob who was without clothes after phasing unexpectedly.

"Hey, Bella. Don't worry, we're all okay. I'm just giving Jake some blood so he'll replenish faster. He lost a lot more this time. Leah's kind of banged up badly, but nothing permanent and Edward's out of it, but he should be coming to pretty soon. Dr. Cullen said he'll be as good as new, eventually." I wondered if anything ever got the better of Seth. I didn't think I'd be able to do this on this day, but I smiled.

"Thanks for the update, Seth. I was worried about all of you." I turned to ask Rosalie about the battle but noticed she had already left, so I asked Esme instead. "Esme, how are things out in the clearing? Is it over yet?"

"We don't know. No one else has been brought here so I'm hoping that means things are going well, but we'll have to wait until someone gets a chance to let us know." Esme came over to me and put a hand on my face. "It's nice to see you again, Bella. I'm sorry about the way we all left. I hope you know we love you and consider you family, no matter what."

"Thank you, Esme. You've always been so kind to me." It broke my heart when I thought of the hopes I had once had when Edward and I were together. It wasn't only him that I wanted; it was a family, and Esme was a large part of that.

I looked around at the four casualties and noticed Edward's eyes twitch. Then, I turned to Jacob and noticed his color had mostly returned. He had also started to move. It wasn't long before both Edward and Jacob were conscious and sitting up. Esme detached the tubing from Seth and Jacob, and Edward gingerly stood up. I had never seen Edward move so slowly before. He looked up from where he stood and saw me. Our eyes met, and he was about to come over, when I heard Jacob's voice.

"Bella!"

Edward stopped in his tracks as Jacob's arms grab me from behind and lift me off the ground.

"Jake, you should be resting."

He set me down and turned me around to face him.

"I'm fine, and you're fine. I'm happy. I can't believe you're here. You have no idea what it was like thinking you had… I can't even say it. I'm just so glad you're here." Jacob wrapped his arms around me once more in a tight embrace, and buried his head in what was left of my hair. "I love you so much, Bells. I don't ever want to be separated from you again."

Before I could answer, Edward interrupted our reunion. "We have to go. Aro knows you're here, Bella. They need all of us in the clearing."

Jacob's hold around me got tighter as he pulled me closer. "I'm not taking her to him, so he can kill her."

"Jacob, it's okay. Aro is at a disadvantage. Victoria and Riley have been destroyed and the Volturi have lost Alec, Felix and Demetri. They are only able to remain alive because of Renata. Aro wants to negotiate. He's not in a position to harm Bella, or anyone else." Jacob didn't reply or move. "Jacob, you know I would never endanger Bella."

"Fine." As he reached to pick me up we heard Leah shout.

"No way! Look, I appreciate how you've taken care of me and my brother, but I'm not ready to be _carried_ by you. I can walk!" Leah struggled to get up as Carlisle futilely tried to help her.

"Leah, stop. You're going to ruin all of Carlisle's work," Seth said, trying to calm his sister.

Jake looked around, assessing the situation. Seth hobbled on a crutch, Edward was slow and sluggish. That left Esme, Carlisle and him. "Esme, could you take Bella please?" he asked.

"It would be my pleasure, Jacob." She smiled, came over and held her arms out for me.

"Carlisle, maybe you could give Seth a hand and I'll take Leah." Carlisle nodded and made his way to Seth. Edward started walking with them and Esme followed behind with me in her arms.

"For Christ's sake, Jake, I don't need to be carried like some prissy damsel in distress," Leah complained, as we departed.

We reached the clearing and contrary to all her complaints, Leah _did_ in fact arrive in Jacob's arms. It was stupid and unreasonable, but I couldn't help but feel jealous watching Jacob, bare-chested, carrying beautiful, tall, barely clothed Leah in his arms. They looked like they had walked out of a movie poster or something. Well, at least they did until they got close enough for me to see Leah's scowl. Jacob set her down on the grass, and she jerked her arm away from his grip, wincing in pain as she did so.

Everyone was there. Edward was right about Aro and the Volturi. The three of them were huddled closely together as the Cullens and wolves surrounded them. As soon as we came into view, Aro's face broke into a smile. He turned toward Carlisle.

"Ah, Carlisle, my dear friend, please do tell your family and..._allies_ that I am not here to inflict harm. I merely want to negotiate. In fact, it was the wolves who were the first to strike."

"You have _got_ to be kidding me!" Jacob shouted. "Your little boy toy went and knocked us out! That's a first strike in my books."

"Merely a negotiation tool we use to ensure no one leaves before the terms have been satisfactorily reached. It is not an aggressive act, and no one was harmed as a result of it." Jacob moved forward to say more, but Carlisle held him back gently with his arm. Jacob backed off, surprising me. I didn't think _anything_ a Cullen said or did could make Jacob concede.

"Aro, we're willing to hear what you have to say. We had no intentions of this turning to violence, but you must understand how dire the situation seemed to us and the Quileutes."

"Ah yes, of course." He redirected his attention to me. "Why, this must be Bella. I must say, it's difficult to detect that scent which sings to Edward at this moment. Ah, wait, yes. I _do_ smell a hint of it. Hmmm, such a shame you've muddied it with all..._this_." Aro waved his hand, indicating my attire. Jacob put his arm around me and held me closely. He must have _really_ loved me to do that. I could barely stand my own stench.

"Well, back to business then. Carlisle, I am most displeased about losing such talented members of my guard. However, I'm willing to overlook this trespass if you would be willing to replace my loss with some of your coven." Aro looked directly at Alice. "I'd be willing to take just one, in exchange."

"We are not chattel to be bought and sold!" Jasper hissed. He put a protective arm around Alice. "You are in no position to make demands. You forget who is at a disadvantage right now."

"Well, yes, it's true that we are outnumbered, but you won't be able to get through our defences. What you forget is that there are many more of us in Volterra, and we do not forget a trespass. _This..._" Aro waved his hands indicating the wolves, "is most unacceptable, and that _human_ cannot remain alive." Aro pointed at me. "We all know the law."

Jacob lunged for Aro but stopped short in mid-air, falling on his feet. He turned away and walked back to me in a confused daze.

"And here, one of your pets have just proven my point." I heard growls coming from a few members of the pack, but no one else attempted to attack. Carlisle held up a hand and spoke.

"Aro, you will not be taking Alice—or anyone else—with you against her will, and I am certain no one here wishes to join you. As for the human girl, she is no threat to our existence. As you can see, she is a part of this pack. They have nothing to gain and everything to lose should _their_ secrets be revealed. She is merely human. In fifty or sixty years she will be gone, along with her secrets. And during that time, she will be with her mate, unable to reveal anything for fear of harming him and his pack." Carlisle waved with his hand, indicating the wolves.

"I don't like these..._wolves_." Aro's nose wrinkled in disgust. "And I don't agree with your lifestyle, Carlisle. It's not natural, but what disturbs me more is how you have involved yourselves in the lives of humans. That's how this whole treaty nonsense happened in the first place and the reason why this girl knows about us. You and your family have become too comfortable in the human world and have forgotten your place."

Edward stepped forward from where he stood and addressed Aro. "There is nothing more for you here. Leave while you can, before we find a way to destroy you, too." Aro looked at Alice again, smiling smugly. "You'll never have her, or me," Edward hissed. "No amount of wishing will change that."

"Such a pity and such a waste." Aro turned again to look at me. "So peculiar though, that Edward cannot read _your_ mind. Hmmm, I wonder if I could..." His hand reached out for mine, but Jacob pushed me behind him, standing in Aro's path. "I won't hurt her; I'm simply curious."

"Well, that's not a good enough reason," Jacob snarled.

"What if we made a deal? We'll leave you and all of your pack alone if you let me see how much she is able to block out. No harm will come to her. Of course, you must in return promise never to hunt vampires outside this area."

"Not much of a deal. You're about one step away from being completely destroyed. You have to actually _have_ _something_ to make a deal!" Jacob barked.

"As I've already pointed out, there are many more of us, and we can come back at any time to destroy your entire tribe. However, that's not what we _prefer_ to do. We'll give you this whole peninsula to roam around in. In fact, we'll even do our part to keep our kind away from here, but you must promise not to phase or hunt vampires outside this boundary. If you keep your end of the agreement, we shall leave all of you alone." Aro again reached for me. Jacob pushed me back with his hand, but I pushed forward this time.

"It's okay, Jake. He can't do anything with all of you here. It's worth it, if it means they'll never come back."

"How are we supposed to trust them?"

"He means what he says, Jacob," Edward answered. "Aro doesn't like the pack, but he also doesn't like complicated messes either. He'll leave all of you alone because he knows in a generation or two there won't be any more wolves, as long as he can keep our kind off your land. That's why he doesn't want any of you to leave."

"It's okay, Jake," I said reassuringly. I walked to Aro and slowly raised my hand toward him. He cradled it gently in both of his and closed his eyes, as though deep in thought. Everyone waited in silence. An excruciatingly long minute passed before he finally looked up.

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing and she is just a human. Imagine what she would be as an immortal?" I heard a low growl coming from Jacob. I jerked my hand away and took a step back. "I wonder..." Aro turned his head and looked at Jane. That's when Edward ran to me and shouted, "No!"

It was too late. Edward crumpled to the ground at my feet, and Jacob had me hidden away behind him again. I peeked around Jacob to see, and met Jane's stare. Her blood red eyes were fixed on mine with enough intensity to ignite a forest. I braced myself for the excruciating pain I knew should be coming but nothing happened. I looked away from her gaze and noticed Aro was holding Jane's hand. He let out a deviant laugh.

"You can stop, my dear. It appears she is immune to _all_ our gifts. Ah, what I wouldn't give to see what talents _she_ would have as one of us." Again, Jacob growled, and this time I felt his arm vibrate.

"Well, I suppose that's not to be." Aro turned his attention to Carlisle again. "As for you and your family, I'm willing to overlook this trespass against my guard, for now. In return, you must alter the way you live. This charade is most unacceptable. It's vile enough that you survive on animals, but to become a part of human life? Well, that puts _all_ of us at risk. Carlisle, there is to be no more. Go where you'd like, do what you want, but stay away from the lives of humans. They are meant to be food, not friends."

"Will that mean the Volturi will leave us alone?" Carlisle asked.

"My dear friend, we are not your enemy. We are here to protect _all_ of our kind. I have no intentions of pursuing you. I merely ask that you do a better job at being discreet so that quandaries such as this," Aro pointed directly at me, "shall not arise again."

"We are agreeable with those terms." Carlisle turned to the large black wolf. "Sam, are you willing to accept the terms Aro has offered?"

"Sam is in agreement as long as I can verify that he is telling the truth," Edward translated. He turned to Sam. "I hear no thoughts to the contrary. He'll leave all of you alone as long as you do not patrol outside this area."

"Well, then our business here is done. We will be making our leave. Carlisle, perhaps you'd like to come and visit us soon in Italy? And you too, Alice—you shall always be welcomed." Aro made a gesture with his hand as he lowered his head, almost in a bow. Then he, with his entourage of two women, left.

I looked around and saw a fire burning off to one side. It billowed purple tinged smoke. As I gazed on the burning limbs and wondered how things would have worked out if the Clearwaters hadn't been with me. Then I thought how things worked out because _I_ was with _them_. It was nice not to be a bystander. I knew I could do things now, even without "super-powers". Today, I wasn't a burden; I didn't get hurt, and I helped those I loved. This was who I wanted to be.

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><p><em>We're coming to the home stretch, not too much left before the story ends. If you want to know anything, or would like some clarification, leave a review or PM me. I answer all reviews (and appreciate them too)!<em>


	14. Treaty

__Here is Chapter 14! One last thing... not a lot of "action" in this chapter, but I promise stuff is REALLY going to happen in the last chapter before the story ends.__

_Before we get to the update, I have to give a HUGE thank you to my pre-reader: **ShadowPast620**! You really rock!_

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><p><strong>Chapter 14 - Treaty<strong>

It wasn't until after we had left the battle site that we thought about our everyday lives. We had risked everything to beat supernatural forces, and now we had to go back to school and parents. It was difficult for all, and I was no exception, especially after hearing the details of events during my absence.

Jacob gave me an account what it had been like while I was gone. Charlie was so distraught that he couldn't even pretend to be angry. All that time, Charlie thought I had run away with Edward, or I had run away on my own. He couldn't decide which was worse.

I felt badly for my father. As far as he knew, I had slipped back into a crazed depression from being dumped by Jake. Charlie was afraid for my sanity and my safety. He received little help from law enforcement, outside his own force, because I was eighteen. He even went to visit Jacob during my absence, apologizing on my behalf, and at one point, begging Jake to take me back and give me another chance once I was found. It broke my heart to hear about that visit. Even Jacob could barely hold back tears because, at that time, he thought I had died but wasn't ready—or able—to tell Charlie yet.

When I returned home, I told Charlie the pregnancy had been a false alarm, and that I knew the gravity of my mistake. I begged him for forgiveness and offered to lock myself away until I hit menopause. Charlie was sad, and the constant look of disappointment on his face broke me up inside. He told me he wasn't going to ground me. He knew Jacob had taken me back—which really gave him brownie points in Charlie's eyes because of my supposed indiscretion. Charlie felt grounding me would disrupt our relationship, hindering its ability to get back on track, and punish Jacob, whom he felt was the last person deserving of of punishment.

What he _did_ insist on was that he have full access to everything that was mine for the foreseeable future. Basically, I lost my right to privacy. The lock on my bedroom door was removed. It was never to be closed, except for dressing. He had free reign to listen in on any telephone conversations (although never did this when Jacob called), and I had to hand over passwords for my computer and email account. He also screened my mail, both incoming and outgoing. I wasn't even allowed to use money. I had to hand over my pay-checks to Charlie every week, and he gave me a debit card for an account that was all mine but which he had full access to. He'd check to see where and what I spent my money on. I didn't resent any of this; after all, as far as he knew, I had cheated on the best guy that ever existed, gotten myself knocked up, and then ran away (for the second time), possibly to get a back alley abortion. Besides, I had nothing to hide—as far as my normal life was concerned, and he was the nicest, most tolerant father when it came to Jacob, and that made it all worthwhile.

Jacob, Leah, and Seth were back to their old selves in a few days. It was amazing how quickly they healed from their injuries. The only evidence left was a very faint scar on Jacob's shoulder and a more prominent one on his thigh. I hadn't seen, or spoken, to any of the Cullens since the battle and had no idea what condition Edward was in, until we went to see them.

It happened four days after the confrontation. The Cullens received a package from the Volturi, and they asked the pack to come over to discuss it since it involved them, as well. I wasn't sure if I should go, but the Cullens had asked me to attend, along with Emily and Kim, as this would affect all of us.

Ten werewolves, two imprints, and I arrived at the Cullen house in Jake's Rabbit and two pick-up trucks—one being my Chevy. To my surprise, Leah drove the Rabbit while Jake rode with me. Everyone seemed in good spirits until we came to the front door. All of a sudden, the jostling and joking stopped. I had never seen this band of boys as quiet as they were then. It was Leah who finally broke the silence.

"You do realize they know we're here. It's just a damn house—don't act like a bunch of ignorant turds." She marched up the front steps, ignored the doorbell, and gave the door a very aggressive knock with her fist.

Emmett came to the door and directed us around the outside of the house, to the backyard.

As with any Cullen event, it appeared Alice had used it as an opportunity to go overboard. The backyard was completely furnished with outdoor furniture that put anything we owned _inside_ our house to shame. There were arm chairs, couches, chaise lounges, coffee tables, end tables and a scattering of bar tables with low backed stools.

Esme was at an elaborate outdoor kitchen area putting steaks on a grill and roasting vegetables. I noticed she was wearing oven mitts. I wondered why she bothered, but then remembered the odor issue.

Alice was putting last minute touches on a giant buffet table. There was an ice sculpture with cold shrimp neatly arranged at its base, plates with fancy hors d'oeuvres, elaborate glass bowls with various salads, the most intricate fruit sculptures I'd ever seen, and a vast array of cakes, pies, cookies and tarts.

Carlisle was lining up glasses at a beverage station. Next to him was a refrigerator with a glass door filled with single serve cartons, cans, and bottles of milk, juices, and sodas.

It felt more like a wedding than a meeting to go over some mail.

Esme saw us come in and walked over to us, smiling. Realistically, no one could have missed our entrance. Who'd be able to overlook nine gigantic boys/men and one tall, dark, and beautiful brooding woman? I, on the other hand, blended into the background.

"Please, come and make yourselves comfortable. We know it's close to dinner for all of you, so I hope you don't mind that we've prepared some things. The hot food should be ready shortly. Please, help yourselves to refreshments while Carlisle updates you on what we have received." No one moved to get anything to eat or drink. Esme had such a hopeful, yet worried look on her face, and I was starting to feel badly for her. "We wore gloves to prepare the few things made here, but much of it was catered. Please, help yourselves."

I was about to elbow Jacob and head toward the drink station when Seth shrugged, skipped over to Carlisle, got a soda and headed for the buffet table. Collin and Brady followed close behind, and I went with them, dragging Jacob along with me. Once the five of us were seated with our drinks and little plates of appetizers, it didn't take long for the rest to follow suit. It was difficult for the pack to pass up food, even if it was at a vampire's house.

Once we were all seated and comfortable, Carlisle started to speak.

"As I said over the telephone, we have gotten word from the Volturi. It is rather lengthy and detailed, so I have taken the liberty of making copies of the package for each of you." Carlisle waved his hand in the air in a subtle gesture. Edward and Jasper appeared and handed everyone a neatly bound booklet. Edward moved around with his usual vampire grace and speed. I saw a very faint, white line on his neck, but other than that, there was no trace of his injuries. The booklet cover read, _Regulations __Within __the __American __Olympic __Peninsula_.

"If you will turn to the first page you'll see a map outlining what the Volturi have determined to be the Quileute territory."

"Who the hell do they think they are? They can't go around telling us where our land is!" Jacob said indignantly.

"We decide for _ourselves_ what we do, and where we live," Sam added, amidst a lot of growling.

"I'm sorry if I've offended you. I'm merely relating what's been communicated by the Volturi. Certainly, what you do with this information is up to you, but they have many others in Italy and crossing them may result in the destruction of your entire tribe." I heard a lot of grumbling, but it subsided, and Carlisle was able to continue.

"As you can see from the map, the Volturi have established the entire peninsula as Quileute land, and crossing over the canal to include Olympia, Tacoma and Seattle."

"Why are the areas on the other side of the canal a different color?" Leah pointed to the areas that contained the larger cities.

"Those areas have different..._rules_ than the rest of the peninsula."

"I don't get it. Why do they care about all this?" Jacob asked. "We're not hunting outside this area. It's not like we've got all day and all night to kill every leech in America."

"They're more concerned about the continued existence of the wolves. The Volturi prefer not to destroy you, as that would call a lot of attention since so many carry the gene, but they _would_ like the phasing to stop after this generation." Carlisle indicated the present company with a wave of his arms. "They have notified nomads and covens in the area that they may no longer reside, pass through, or hunt in the area determined as your land, and a small perimeter beyond it. They will also be recruiting to establish rotating patrols just outside this perimeter to ensure it remains free of our kind."

"So, this thing here," Leah said, waving the booklet, "is what we have to do in return?"

"Yes. They would like every Quileute, whether or not they are known to carry the gene, to reside in that area while they are between the ages of nine and thirty-five. They may not leave the peninsula for more than three weeks at a time, and no more than six weeks in total in one calendar year."

"What the hell?" Quil jumped up out of his seat. "You're kidding, right? How are we supposed to keep people from leaving? We're just a bunch of kids, and last I checked, this was a free country."

"There are already many Quileutes, or part Quileutes, who've already left. We're powerless to bring them back, or prevent others from leaving," Sam commented more diplomatically.

"I believe the answer to your questions begins on page five and continues through to page seventeen. You may go through it in more detail at your convenience, but essentially, the Volturi will make subtle arrangements to entice those who have left—who are between nine and thirty-five, or have minor children—to come back to the area. They also have a very elaborate plan to bring a industries and businesses into the area to prevent your young people from leaving. Aro has even added a generous scholarship program for colleges in the area. What the Volturi expects is that the pack, their families, and offspring adhere to these conditions precisely, and that you all use your influence with the council to begin a campaign supporting the scholarship programs and the new industries and businesses to encourage tribe members to return to the area and remain here to raise their families."

Paul threw his booklet on the nearest table and stood up. "We don't need their damn charity!" Sam put a hand on Paul's shoulder and pushed him down into his seat.

"I assure you, the Volturi are not doing this to be charitable." It was the first time Edward had spoken tonight. "They are doing this to ensure no more of your people phase, ever. Aro fears—if left unchecked—the gene will become widespread within the human population and packs will show up all over the continent. Aro also recognizes that your blood is not palatable to our kind and would like to prevent it from spreading into too much of the human population."

"He's trapping us in this one place until he can find a way to kill us all without calling attention to themselves, isn't he?" Leah's voice was laced with bitterness. "We'll be sitting ducks waiting for whatever disaster Mr. Blood Fest CIA can think of. And it'll come. One day, the water supply will get contaminated, or maybe it'll be a terrorist attack, whatever. This is his way of keeping us in one place until he comes up with a plan."

"You're probably right, Leah," Carlisle replied in agreement. "But what other choice is there? The few they brought with them were merely a taste of their guard, and I can assure you, Aro is actively recruiting right now. Not just existing vampires, but he is also looking for humans with the potential for special abilities to turn and join their ranks. Their plans do not span months, years, or even decades. The Volturi are very old, much older than us. Time is of little consequence for them. They are ready to wait centuries for the perfect opportunity, provided you and your tribe are not a problem for them during that time. That is a long time to think about how to deal with them when and if they attack. In the meantime, this _arrangement_ is the only way to ensure a peaceful existence for you, your children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren."

"Okay, so what's the rule with these areas that include Seattle, Tacoma, and Olympia?" It was Leah again. She seemed to have more questions than anyone else. I was curious about it at first, until I remembered our conversation from a few days ago, of her desire to escape from Sam and the pack.

"Those are areas where you may attend college, as options are limited west of those cities; however, none of you may reside east, or south of interstate 5. And that highway can only be crossed in order to attend school. In addition, that area is off limits from June until the end of August, except for day trips that cannot exceed more than one day every two weeks."

"So you're telling me I'm stuck here forever?" Leah shouted. Her face was red and if I didn't know better, she looked like she might cry.

"It's only until you're thirty-five, Leah." Seth said to her in a quiet voice.

"Seth, how far away does thirty-five feel to you?" Seth opened his mouth to say something, but decided against it and went back to his food. There was tension in the air.

"I'm afraid for those who have already phased, the rule goes beyond age thirty-five." Leah angrily questioned Carlisle with her gaze. "It is a lifetime requirement. The Volturi do not feel you can be trusted to deny your natural instincts to kill vampires should you have more than just incidental exposure."

I feared the meeting would crumble when Sam came over and put an arm around Leah's shoulder. He was rubbing her arm with the hand that rested there as he whispered something to her. She turned her head away from him. If I didn't know better, I would wager that she was holding back tears. I glanced over in Emily's direction. She was sitting alone looking uncomfortable. Her face hung down, staring at her lap as she fiddled with her fingers. We all saw and squirmed, feeling helpless to end the awkwardness. Embry sprang up then in an attempt to divert attention away from them.

"Look, the steaks are ready. Let's eat. We can talk more, later." He didn't wait for an answer. Embry nudged Quil and pulled on Jared's arm as he got up and headed to the buffet table. Quil walked with him, while Jared and Kim followed closely behind. I noticed the smell of the meat wafting over and saw Esme arranging them on the buffet table. It didn't take long for the rest to decide we needed to take a break and soon all the wolves and their imprints were eating again. Leah just sat in a chair by herself looking sad. She waited for everyone else to serve themselves before making her way to the food.

I felt badly for her. She was alone in this pack of boys. No one else had to contend with what she had to, and it seemed no one else needed to escape the reservation to preserve their sanity. I got up intending to go to her when our eyes met. We stared at each other briefly, and I thought I saw invitation in her gaze. It was fleeting, but I was sure it was there. Before I could act on it, she sneered at me and turned away. I wasn't brave enough to try a second time, so with resignation, I sat back down in my seat and stabbed a potato with my fork.

As we ate, I noticed everyone had broken up into smaller groups. Seth, Collin and Brady were eating and joking around, while the rest of the pack flipped through the booklet as they ate, talking amongst themselves. Once in a while I'd see someone nod, as if in approval. More often, it someone slammed the booklet on a table and cursed, or waved it around and spoke angrily.

Jasper and Edward were gone, while Esme and Alice stood spoke in hushed voices while they lingered in the perimeter.

I had finished eating, and Jacob was occupied in conversation with Sam and Quil. I took this time to seek out Rosalie. I knew she was inside the house with Emmett because I could see both of them through the window. They were sitting in front of the television watching a baseball game. I came into the house through the back door and waved as Emmett looked up.

"Hi Rosalie, Emmett. Do you mind if I speak with you for a minute?" Emmett smiled, patting the seat next to him. I sat down, smiled back at him but turned to face Rosalie. "Rosalie, I want to thank you…for what you did for Jacob, twice. I know you're not fond of me, or the pack, which makes me even more indebted to you."

Rosalie looked at me. I couldn't read her expression. It wasn't the usual distain, but it wasn't warmth either. Something about her appeared different, but I couldn't put my finger on it. "I know you love him, and no matter what I think of you, or him, you deserve a chance to live the life you've chosen." I smiled weakly, not quite comprehending everything she was trying to say to me. She saw my confusion "Don't waste the opportunity I've given you, Bella. Don't make anymore stupid decisions. Do you understand?" I nodded hesitantly. She looked away exasperated. "You don't understand, not fully. Look, you don't owe me anything, and you're welcome, now go back to your friends." She lifted the remote and started flipping through channels.

Emmett peered over at me apologetically and shrugged his shoulders. I gingerly lifted myself off the couch when Rosalie suddenly dropped the remote and succumbed to a coughing fit. Emmett held her hand and rubbed her back. He picked up a covered, thermal travel cup from the coffee table and gave it to her. Rosalie took slow sips from it. That's when I noticed the drops of red left around the rim as she put the cup back down. She looked up at me and noticed her eyes were black, the color indicating hunger, but they were also rimmed with the slightest tinge of red. Her face was different too. Her usual ivory skin looked subtly ashen with a pale, translucent green spreading across her cheeks.

"Rose, what's wrong? Did Jacob's blood do this to you? Are you going to be okay?"

"You should leave." She pointed to the cup. "I'm drinking donated human blood to…recover. It's not safe for you to stay close to me for long." She sat on the sofa, motionless.

"Nothing's going to happen to me, Rose. You're strong, and if you're worried you're not, Emmett certainly is." I sat down again next to her. "Please tell me what's wrong. Are you going to be okay?"

She wouldn't look at me; instead, she went back to the television, flipping through channels. Emmett put his hand on my shoulder, turning me to face him. "Carlisle thinks she's had too much exposure to wolf blood in too short a time. Both times, her body absorbed some of it before she had a chance to expel it all. It was worse the second time because she had to remove more to get all the venom out."

"Is she going to get better?" I asked.

Emmett shrugged and answered, "No one's ever heard of a vampire getting sick. We get injured or bitten by other vampires, but it's not like this. Carlisle doesn't know what to expect. We've got her on human blood to strengthen her, but don't worry Bella, she'll be fine." Emmett didn't look convinced.

I put a hand on Emmett's shoulder and tried to give it a reassuring squeeze. He smiled weakly at me and went back to holding Rosalie. I left feeling helpless.

In the backyard, much of the conversation had subsided and no one seemed angry anymore. I wanted to tell Jacob about Rosalie, or at least ask Carlisle, but I knew everyone—both inside and outside the house—would hear me. It didn't seem right to be discussing Rosalie when she'd hear every word I had to say. As I debated what to do, Carlisle approached us.

"Bella, I hope you don't mind, but I overheard your conversation in the house."

"No, it's all right. I'm glad you've brought it up because I wasn't sure if it would be okay for me to ask. Is Rosalie going to get better?" Jacob looked over at me, perplexed. I guess he was too preoccupied in the discussions to pay attention to the exchange inside the house. I turned to him and explained, "Rosalie's sick because some of your blood was absorbed by her body." In that moment I saw with my periphery vision, every member of the pack turn and look in our direction.

Carlisle gave more information, filling the gaps for us. "It's new for all of us. No one has ever heard of a vampire becoming…ill. But then again, no vampire would ever be tempted to drink werewolf blood. Under normal, fighting conditions, one of our kind may bite, but would never attempt to drink from a wolf." Carlisle nodded in Jacob's direction. "However, Rosalie's intent was different, so she consumed a vast quantity of wolf blood and some of it absorbed into her body before she had a chance to expel all of it. She showed virtually no symptoms after the first time, but it was much less then. The second time, there was more venom to extract, and it had already made its way through a lot of Jacob's body by the time she came upon him."

"I did something to her?" Jacob looked genuinely concerned. I never thought I'd see the day when he showed compassion for a vampire, but here it was. "Can I do something to help her?" I noticed him rubbing his thigh where Victoria had bitten him.

"Well, right now she is maintaining a diet of donated blood, and it seems to be helping. I'm trying to buy a supply as often as I can that is fresher and hasn't been stored for too long. It's not an easy thing to enquire about without raising questions, but she is improving." Carlisle appeared conservative in his assessment, but still hopeful. It was enough to offer me a hint of reassurance. Then I thought about _everything_ he said.

"Fresher blood makes a difference?" I asked. Carlisle nodded. "I want to help, Carlisle. She did this for Jacob because I asked her to. I owe her everything I can spare. I can donate blood."

There was a strange silence. No one spoke, yet no one moved or made eye contact with me. I looked over at Carlisle but he was looking at the window, into the house. Jacob looked down at his lap, rubbing the scar on his thigh. The rest of the pack looked uncomfortable as they shuffled their feet, trying to act like they hadn't heard the conversation. The silence was broken by Sam.

"Carlisle, your family needs to leave. We cannot in good conscience maintain our agreement if one of you has started to drink human blood. It jeopardizes the safety of our families." Sam was very firm, though he maintained a calm demeanor.

"We understand your concerns, Sam. I can assure you that our family is taking every precaution, and Rosalie is staying within the boundaries of our home during this time. We will leave Forks once she has recovered." I took this opportunity to jump in again with my suggestion.

"I can help her recover more quickly." I looked over at Sam, "It'll mean she can travel sooner." Again, everyone looked down at their feet, not saying a word, except for Jacob, Sam, and Carlisle. The three of them all stared at me. Carlisle looked hopeful, Jacob appeared conflicted, and Sam was obviously angry. "Okay, someone has to say something. What's wrong with me donating blood? She's already drinking blood that someone else donated; why can't _I_ be the donor?" Again, silence. "No one has anything to say?"

Finally, Jacob spoke. "Bells, I owe Rosalie my life, and I'd do what I could to help her, but I don't like the idea of her—or any vamp—drinking your blood, donated or not."

"But, Jake, if it could help her… You said you'd help her if you could…"

"Yeah, I'd like to help her because she saved me, but _you_ shouldn't be the one having to risk anything."

"I wouldn't be risking anything. People donate blood all the time, and Carlisle's a doctor. You can't tell me he can't draw some blood from me?" I turned to Carlisle. "You'd make sure it was safe, wouldn't you, Carlisle?"

"We would never jeopardize your safety, Bella, but this does present a rather peculiar situation," Carlisle answered. "Rosalie doesn't know who donated the blood she drinks, and it's…old, somewhat stale. But yours would be fresh and she would see you. If she drank it several times she may develop a…taste for it. It is not completely without risk."

I heard quiet but distinct growling from several pack members, including Jacob. "I don't like this, Bella."

"She won't hurt me, and none of the Cullens would let her anyway." I put a hand on Jacob's, squeezing tightly. "Jake, it's okay. We can draw the blood in one place and she can drink it somewhere else. You can come with me when we do it. That would be okay, right Carlisle?"

"Yes, of course. Please, bring anyone you wish. Whatever would make you comfortable." Carlisle spoke directly to Jacob. "This is not an ideal solution for us either, but it will likely speed Rosalie's recovery which will mean we will make our leave of Forks that much sooner."

I looked around and saw contemplation on some of the other faces. Sam saw me looking at him, but he wouldn't meet my eyes. He looked directly at Jacob, challenging him with his gaze. I looked up at Jacob myself questioningly.

"If I come with her, bring a couple of others, and she drinks somewhere else." Jacob paused, looking from me, to Sam, and then to Carlisle. "You won't take a drop more than what is absolutely safe for her to lose?"

"Of course, Jacob, that goes without saying."

"And you really believe it'll make her better, sooner?" Carlisle nodded. "And you'll all leave sooner?" Carlisle nodded again. "Okay, I'm willing to let Bella try it, but the minute anything happens—no matter how minor, we end it."

I heard loud stomping and shuffling as Sam gathered up Emily and stood to leave. He motioned to the others and they walked away without looking up at us or saying good-bye. Emily mouthed "sorry" as she passed by me with Sam pulling on her arm. Jared, Kim, Paul, Collin, and Brady followed close behind. Sam indicated to Leah as he passed her, but she stared him down without moving. Sam then looked to Seth, but Leah put an arm out in front of her brother and shook her head at Sam. The looks they gave each other were enough to burn a person alive. Now it was Emily's turn to pull on Sam's arm as they finally left in silence.

I wasn't sure what had transpired, or why Quil and Embry remained without any challenge or order from Sam. I wanted to ask, but it wasn't the right time. There were other, more urgent, matters at hand.

"Great. Why don't we start right now?" I asked. Those who remained looked over at me like I was insane. "What? What's wrong with now? I'm healthy, and I've just had a large meal. Isn't that a good time to donate blood?"

"I don't know, Bells–" Jacob started, but I interrupted him before he could finish.

"Jake, it's the best time to try. We can do it out in the yard while Rosalie stays in the house. You have Quil, Embry, Leah, and Seth here with you. If that's not enough insurance, what is?" He looked around at the remaining pack members, and I saw a few of them nod.

"Fine."

It only took a few minutes for the Cullens to get everything set up. The whole family went into the house and every window was closed. Rosalie was no longer in the room visible from the backyard and Carlisle was the only Cullen outside, attending to me.

I laid down on one of the chaise lounges with a table full of cookies and juice sitting next to me. I looked away from everything and closed my eyes as Carlisle stuck me with a needle. It took a while to get the one pint that was deemed safe. Once it was done, Carlisle ran into the house to deliver it and came right back out.

"Rosalie is very grateful to you, Bella. We all are, thank you." Carlisle looked to Jacob. "I know you'd like to leave soon, but Bella needs to rest for a short while. She should eat and drink. Perhaps we can finish up business in the mean time, if you know what Sam has decided?" Jacob nodded.

"We've decided to accept what the Volturi have offered. Doesn't look like we have too many options," Jacob answered. "Sounds like they're going to do whatever they want, regardless of what we decide, am I right?" Carlisle nodded. "Well, then we might as well reap the benefits. We don't like accepting hand-outs…"

"Be rest assured, Jacob, the Volturi do not give hand-outs. The industry and scholarships are not for your benefit. They are going to go forth with those regardless of whatever decisions you make. That is their insurance that as many of the Quileutes as possible will stay in this area." I heard Jacob sigh, defeated.

"I guess that's what the tribe wants, too. If they keep their word and keep the lee– the vampires out of our lands then it's worth it. If it means young kids'll stop phasing, we'll give it a shot." Jacob looked at Seth when he said this.

"I think it's a wise decision, Jacob. It'll bring many good things to your people and take away a lot of the bad," Carlisle added.

"Well, if we're done here, we're going as soon as Bella's able."

"She should be fine in ten or fifteen minutes."

"When should I come back to donate more, tomorrow?" I asked.

Carlisle frowned. "No, Bella. You can't donate more than once every two months or so. We are hoping to leave in the fall, sooner if Rosalie recovers faster. You will likely only be back one or two more times. This was very helpful. Our kind don't feed as frequently as humans, so it will make a large impact. Thank you, you have done enough."

"But…" I tried to protest but Carlisle had already left.

Jacob put the cup of juice in my hands and put his arm around my shoulders. "Come on, Bells. Drink this juice, and I'll take you home soon. You've done everything you can, okay?" I nodded with resignation and reached for a cookie.

We sat quietly, waiting until Carlisle gave me the all clear to leave. It was only fifteen minutes, but it seemed much longer. Everyone was quiet and uncomfortable. No one liked the idea of Rosalie drinking my blood, but they also realized that her condition was a result of saving Jacob's life. I decided not to say anything more about it. Carlisle wasn't going to take any more blood from me no matter what I said anyway.

After leaving the Cullen house, we all went back to La Push and everyone went home. Jacob and I headed to his place. We walked in and heard Billy greet us, but he stopped speaking mid-sentence as we crossed the threshold of his front door. Jacob was holding me in his arms.

"Bella, were you injured?" Billy asked. I was mortified. I slapped Jacob's arm, hurting my hand more than him.

"I told you I was fine, Jake!" Billy raised an eyebrow as Jacob put me down.

"She 'donated' some blood," Jacob replied, using air quotes. Billy didn't say anything, but kept staring at us. "The leech who sucked out the venom from me got sick from my blood. She's been drinking donated blood to recover and apparently fresh stuff works better." Jacob rolled his eyes. "The good news is they're all leaving as soon as she's better."

"Jacob, be respectful!" I was surprised by Billy's reaction. "That vampire owed you nothing, but she still saved your life. The only reason you're standing here being ungrateful and rude is because she went and made herself sick for you!" Billy started wheeling himself to the front door. "Drive me out there. I'm donating too."

Jacob's mouth dropped open. In fact, so did mine.

"What? She saved my son's life. If I can donate blood for strangers, I can certainly donate blood for her. Now get this door open and drive me over there!"

"But, Dad…"

"Jacob, now!"

"Fine, but I'm picking up Quil and Embry on the way. I'm not letting you near one that's feeding on human blood without back-up."

"Whatever you have to do, son." Jacob grabbed Billy's wheelchair and grumbled as he pushed it out. As Billy passed me, he looked up and winked.

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><p><em>Thanks for reading, and you'll get even more thanks if you leave a review because I love reviews!<em>


	15. Escaping Destiny

_This is the final chapter for this story, but don't assume that means it's a dull "tying of loose ends." Many things happen, some of it pivotal to the future of Jacob and Bella's relationship._

_Many thanks to my beta from Project Team Beta: Love of Escapism who came through even though she had to endure all sorts of RL calamities._

_Huge bundles of appreciation also to ShadowPast620 who pre-read this chapter for me, and answered an extremely long barrage of anxiety ridden craziness type questions on my part._

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><p><strong>Chapter 15 - Escaping Destiny<strong>

The summer came and passed quickly, but it was far from uneventful. I graduated from High School, along with Edward and Alice. It was an understated day, but Charlie was there, beaming. Jacob and Billy were there as well to show their support. Having all three of them made it a real event for me. I was no longer the lone child of a lone parent; instead, I was with family.

Rosalie recovered faster than predicted, even though Billy wasn't allowed to donate blood after all. Initially, I was concerned his blood would be too similar to Jacob's, but he had never phased so that wasn't the issue. The problem was that his diabetes was not managed well enough. Billy and I were both disappointed, but in the end Rosalie did get a second "live" donor.

Jake's sister Rachel returned to La Push about the time I graduated. At first things were pleasant and uncomplicated, but that didn't last long. Two days after her arrival, Paul imprinted on her. It meant Jacob and Billy didn't have to keep secrets from her anymore, but things were now tense in the Black household. Rachel took a week to digest and accept the barrage of information, but once she did, her relationship with Paul took off immediately.

Jacob was already upset that another pack member had imprinted. The fact that it was Paul who had imprinted on his sister made it that much worse. They were constantly bickering. They had even resorted to fist fights a few times which Rachel, Billy or I had to break up. The animosity between Paul and Jake became worse when Rachel found out about Rosalie and wanted to donate blood as well. Paul was livid and did everything he could to keep Rachel from doing it. Somehow, she found a way to convince Jacob to take her, without Paul's knowledge. Of course, secrets were difficult to keep in the pack, especially since Quil and Seth had accompanied the Blacks.

The tension between Paul and Jacob only added to the division that was now apparent in the pack. I found out Jacob had begun to exert some of his authority as the born Alpha during my absence. He had many disagreements with Sam during those three days, and although Sam was still technically the pack's leader, Jacob did as he pleased and Sam didn't order him otherwise. Quil and Embry stood by their friend through everything, their existing bond strengthening. I found out later from Embry that Jacob and Sam almost fought physically over the Alpha position, but stopped at everyone's urging. They put their differences aside to face the Volturi, and now, they avoided each other.

There were two distinct groups now. Jacob, Quil, Embry, Seth, and Leah gathered together often, either at the Black or Clearwater homes, while Sam, Jared, Paul, Collin, and Brady hung out at Emily's. They patrolled at different times to avoid being phased together and sent messages to each other, but only for scheduling purposes. Embry told me there couldn't be two Alphas and things were going to come to a head at one point. No one knew when that would be, or what would happen, but everyone was worried about it.

The summer wasn't all bad though. Jacob and I had a magical two months together. We saw each other practically every day. He worked with Quil and Embry out at a nearby lumber yard, while I was at Newton's working the summer rush. Afterwards, we met up for dinner, movie nights, or just to hang out. Our relationship blossomed, and I was a permanent part of his life, just as he had become a permanent part of mine. Even Charlie finally forgave me, and he absolutely loved Jacob. It was too good to be true.

On August 13th I woke up feeling out of sorts. There appeared to be nothing different about this day from any other day, but it felt as though something was off. It began when I stepped out of the shower, walked into my room, and glanced at myself in the mirror. I had a white towel wrapped around my body and another one on my head in a make-shift turban. I looked at myself covered in white and couldn't stop staring. I didn't know what I was staring at or why, but I couldn't move away. It wasn't until Charlie passed by my open door and cleared his throat that I was jolted out of my trance.

"Uh, Bells? Is everything all right?" I turned to look at him as my foggy thoughts started to fade.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I was just…thinking. I'm going to get dressed now. I'll see you downstairs, Dad." I smiled at him and gently closed my door.

I slowly got dressed, combed my wet hair, and was about to head downstairs when the phone rang. I looked at it curiously wondering who would be calling at eight o'clock on a Sunday morning. I reached over to my night table and picked up the hand set.

"Hello?"

"Bella, it's Rosalie."

"Oh, hi, Rosalie." I felt suddenly uncomfortable. She had made a point of avoiding me the two times I donated blood, so I hadn't seen or talked to her since early June.

"Edward would like to meet with you, to talk. Do you remember? You said you'd do it after the…requisite time Jacob had asked for. It's been almost seven months since January. Is that okay with you?" I had forgotten all about it. Edward was never around, and my feelings for him had faded into the background. Now that Rosalie mentioned all this, a wave of emotions overtook my senses. It seemed strange, and not quite in line with what I knew in my heart.

"Umm, yeah. I promised him we'd talk, but why are _you_ calling about it?"

"Oh, he thought it would be less awkward if someone else made the arrangements. Would tomorrow evening work for you? Perhaps right after you've finished dinner?"

"Sure. Where did he want to meet?"

"I'll come pick you up. See you at seven." Before I could answer, Rosalie hung up.

I did the best I could to shake the unusual barrage of emotions and nagging uncertainty as I went downstairs, grabbed a cold pop tart and made my way to La Push.

Jacob and I had planned an entire day together. We were going to start off on our own and then meet up with Quil and Embry at the beach. I did the best I could to have a good time, but I felt lackluster. Jake noticed my melancholy state, too. We were at the beach waiting for the others, sitting on the sand. I was leaning into Jacob's chest, and his arms were wrapped around me.

"Bells, are you going to tell me what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong."

"Okay, are you going to tell me what's got you…perplexed?"

"Edward wants to meet with me tomorrow, to talk. Remember, you wanted me to wait a few months first…"

"Yeah, I remember." Jacob let out a loud sigh. "I guess I can't deny him a conversation, unless you don't want to?" Jacob eyed me with doubtful hope.

"I think I owe him at least that much." Jacob didn't say anything, so I asked, "Are you okay with it?"

"I guess as okay as I can be." He reached down and kissed the top of my head. "Can I see you afterwards, no matter how late it is?"

"Of course, Jake."

"You promise? No matter what happens, or what time it is, you'll come see me? _Right_ after?" I turned and looked up at him.

"What exactly do you think is going to happen?"

"Just promise me, please?" Jacob spoke very quietly and looked out into the ocean, avoiding my eyes.

"I promise."

The rest of the day passed with an unspoken distance between us. By the time I got home that night I felt more alone than I had in a long time. It took me a while to get to sleep, and when I finally did, it was anything but restful. I tossed and turned, waking often from nightmares I couldn't remember.

Morning finally came, and I headed to Newton's, eager for a distraction. I had a long shift that day, which I made longer by doing some grocery shopping on the way home. Once home, I cooked, Charlie and I ate, and then I cleaned up. The last dish was dried and put away when Rosalie arrived to pick me up in Emmett's jeep. I said my goodbyes to Charlie and followed her out to the car. I was feeling both nervous and idiotic. While I was certainly apprehensive about my meeting with Edward, I was even more terrified of being alone in the car with Rosalie; thus, the reason for feeling idiotic.

"So, where are we going?" I asked.

"Our house. We're all going hunting, except for Edward. The two of you will have privacy to talk freely." I nodded, not knowing what to say. Rosalie looked over at me, contemplating something before speaking again. "Bella, you'll use your head, won't you?"

"I'm not sure what you're asking me."

"Think about what you feel and know in your heart right now. Don't get overwhelmed. Our kind…we have a way of clouding a human's judgement." Rosalie's words reminded me of Edward's from so long ago. I was reminded of that first time in the meadow, when he had told me about all the attributes vampires had to lure their prey, attributes they didn't need.

"Thanks, but I know what I'm doing…" I was still a little confused about why she was telling me this, or why she was the one picking me up.

"I know you think that now, but Edward will be using everything he's got tonight." She paused, making a turn. "I insisted I had to be the one to pick you up. I told them I wanted to thank you properly. They were afraid your blood would be too tempting, but Alice saw that the outcome of our trip would be fine."

"Didn't Alice already see how my 'talk' with Edward would end? Did she see something happen? Is that what all this is about?"

"She wasn't able to see the final outcome…just some bits and pieces." Rosalie sounded like the vision was displeasing to her.

"Why are you doing this, Rose?"

"Bella, you have a chance to have this blessed life with someone you love."

"Don't _you_ have that too?"

"What I have is an existence of frozen monotony. It's not a life, not like the one you can have. I'm going to tell you something, and I want you to remember it, always. No matter how seductive our existence might seem, none of us would choose it over what you have."

I nodded, and we drove the rest of the way in silence.

When we arrived, Rosalie said her goodbyes to me on the front steps and left.

I walked into the house alone and found Edward waiting for me in the living room. He looked as beautiful as ever standing in the white room smiling at me crookedly as the golden glow coming from the raging fireplace warmed his usually pale complexion. He met me as I made my way in and took my hand. The minute his hand touched mine something happened. I was instantly drawn to him and swept up by a need to touch him. It was magnetic and didn't coincide with what I knew was true in my heart. Something unknown was pulling me to him.

"Hi," I whispered hesitantly.

"Thank you for coming here tonight, Bella," Edward replied. "Please, let's sit down." He led me to the living room and gently guided me to the couch. I sat at one end, and he sat next to me, still holding my hand. My head told me to keep a safe distance between us but my body moved closer to his. I leaned into him and rested my head on his shoulder as his arm draped over me. I felt his cool body next to mine. The heat of the fireplace warmed to enough to enjoy his icy touch.

"I don't know what to say…" I looked down at our clasped hands.

"Perhaps, you will allow me to explain why I left you last fall?" Edward asked tentatively.

"Of course, Edward."

"We've certainly had our fair share of…misunderstandings, haven't we?" I nodded in agreement. "Bella, I love you. I left you because I thought a life with me was no life at all." I opened my mouth to speak but he put a finger to my lips, silencing me. I decided he deserved a chance to have his say, without interruptions. "I believe this…_existence_ I have right now is my eternity. I feel there is nothing for me after this. As far as I know, my soul was sacrificed when I cheated death. I loved you so much, and I still love you as much, if not more… It was because of this love that I didn't want to—actually _couldn't_—take your life and soul away from you. I realize now that it was not my decision to make. I never gave you a chance to decide for yourself what _you_ wanted with your life. Instead, I imposed what _I_ wanted for you, and I am truly sorry for that. I would like to give you the chance to make those decisions I had taken away from you before. Come back to me, Bella. Come back to all of us. I will do whatever you want of me. I will change you myself for a chance at forever with you."

"Edward, I've made my decision. I'm with Jacob…and I love _him._"

"I know, Bella, but you love me, as well. I understand why you've chosen a life with Jacob, and ten months ago, I would have encouraged you to choose that life, a human life, but I've learned that I cannot bear to be without you. When I thought you had died, I wanted to fall in front of Aro and beg him to kill me. I realized then that I could not exist in a world without you. I'm willing to give you anything, Bella, and to do anything you ask, if you will have me again."

"Edward, please…" I struggled to hold them back tears, wanting to be strong for my own sanity, for Jake. I was afraid if I cried, I'd change my mind.

"Bella, I know you feel you've made a choice, but think about _everything_. You know I love you as much as Jacob does, if not more. And I know you love me, too. I know there are things you cannot have with me, but there are things you cannot have with Jacob, either. Let me show you the world and experience things you've only read about in books."

"Edward, you know I don't care about material things like that…" He placed his palm on my cheek.

"It's easy to say you don't care about things you have never had or experienced. Life with Jacob can be…content, but it will never go beyond La Push." I opened my mouth to speak, but Edward silenced me with his finger to my lips. "It doesn't have to be now. I'll be waiting for you, Bella…always. Remember what I told you. I don't care what you do from now until that time. It doesn't matter what life you have led, what baggage you think you carry, or how old you have become. No matter what the circumstance, I will be waiting for you. Even if it is because Jacob has imprinted, and I am second choice, I'll accept that with joy. Even if everyone you know has died, and you fear your own mortality, I will take that with relish, if it means you will join me."

"Edward…"

"Shhh… Bella, if it is not yes, please don't say anything right now." Edward looked away for a moment. I sat silently and sadness crept over his face. "May I give you a gift?"

I nodded.

Edward pressed a small metal object into my hand. It was a silvery square, that looked like a miniature compact mirror. "It's for you to contact me, wherever, whenever." I opened it up, and engraved on one side were two telephone numbers, an address to a P.O. Box, and an email address. On the other side it simply read,

_Anytime, anywhere, under any circumstance._

"And if, for some unfathomable reason, none of that works, drive a distance away from the wolves and start calling for Alice."

"And exactly how would I go about doing that? Should I hold a séance?" I asked with a smile.

"Does that mean you're considering my proposal?" He returned with a quiet chuckle.

"I hadn't realized that's what this was."

"It's anything you want it to be, Bella." There was a pause. It only lasted a few seconds, but it seemed much longer. Finally, Edward broke the silence. "I'm sure if you are away from the wolves, and you start to write Alice's name over and over again, she will see you soon enough."

"Where are you moving to? I'd still like to visit, to see Alice, and the rest…"

Edward looked sad to hear me say that. "No, Bella, it can never be that way. We will be watched closely. The Volturi do not like how large and powerful our coven has become, and Aro wants me and Alice, _badly_. You can never make contact with us, unless you are ready to be changed. You heard Aro; we can never have any…_relationships_ with humans ever again. It wasn't a suggestion."

Edward moved to get up, but I stopped him, grabbing his arm. He sat back down and took my hand in both of his.

"Edward, what would happen, if I chose you?"

"We would live happily ever after, forever."

"Just the two of us?"

Edward raised an eyebrow, questioningly. Then he looked distant, as understanding set in.

"Yes, Bella, just the two of us and my family. If you should choose to join us, you too must leave your human ties behind, forever. But you don't have to give up all of your human _experiences_. You can wait until Charlie and Renee have lived a long, full life before joining me. I will wait for you for the rest of your life, but you cannot have a human life, and us, at the same time. It can only be one or the other. Bella, I know what your choice is, right now, and I know there's nothing more I can do to change your mind. I know this is goodbye, for a while, perhaps forever… May I ask for something?"

"Yes."

"Will you let me kiss you one last time? Because you once loved me most? Because I thought you were dead but now you're alive? Because this may be the last time I hold you in my arms?"

How could I deny him this? He hadn't discarded me and left like I thought. As misguided as he was, everything he did was done out of love, for me. I couldn't deny him this one last request. I looked at his eyes searching for…myself. I wanted to know if the life I had longed for with him once was still there.

Edward moved closer to me and stroked my cheek with the back of his hand. I leaned into it, closing my eyes, and breathing in his intoxicating aroma. At that moment, while my eyes were closed, I felt cold marble lips touch mine. I jerked back slightly, startled, but Edward persisted and eventually I leaned in to kiss him back. All the old feelings came rushing in as I was enveloped by the taste, smell, and feel of my angel. His hands moved gently around my body, holding me closely. My own arms betrayed me as they crept around his shoulders and embraced him. I was overwhelmed by the moment and the rush of sensations.

In my head, I felt the pang of guilt as thoughts led to Jacob, but my body wouldn't stop. My body and my brain no longer seemed connected, but were instead acting independently from each other. Edward's hands creep down to the bottom of my shirt, lifting it slightly as his fingers grazed my bare skin. His mouth coaxed mine as our kiss moved to territories that had previously been forbidden. My head was sounding alarms telling to me to stop, but my body responded to Edward, ignoring what my mind was screaming. The struggle was tearing me up inside, and I couldn't understand what was happening. What was this lure that had taken over?

I was now laying on the couch, on my back, with Edward on top of me. He was touching me, kissing me, and breathing in my scent. I felt his legs twine with mine and my hands moved in front of him, unbuttoning his shirt. My head filled with pain, and tears formed beneath my closed eyelids. The screaming in my mind demanded I stop, but my body struggled to do just the opposite. Eventually, my mind won out. My hands finally froze. I turned my head to the side and Edward stopped his caresses. He lifted himself off of me and helped me up into a sitting position.

"I'm sorry, Bella."

"You don't need to apologize, Edward. You did nothing wrong. It was what I had always wanted when we were together."

"But not now?"

"Not enough to risk what I already have." The pain and loss in his face almost broke me again

"My thoughts will always be of you, Bella. I'm glad you have found happiness, even if it is not with me." He leaned over and kissed my forehead.

I was overcome by an intense feeling of loss. I didn't understand why this was happening. Before coming here, I was already aware that I couldn't be without Jacob. Losing Edward had broken me, but losing Jacob would leave me beyond repair. What was most confusing to me now was that I couldn't pinpoint what I had lost to make me feel so hollow inside. I wasn't overwhelmed by a need to see or hear Edward like I had been six months ago. I didn't ache for the company of Alice, or the rest of the Cullens. It was an emptiness for something I couldn't define, or even be sure of. All I knew was that there was a void inside me that begged to be filled.

I turned away quickly before my body was again possessed by a will of its own. "I have to go, Edward."

"May I drive you home?" I began to shake my head, but Edward suddenly pushed me down on to the couch and stood in front of it. His back was to me, and he was in what appeared to be an attack stance. I was confused, but never got a chance to ask what was happening. Before I could make sense of the situation a giant, russet wolf came crashing through the front door. A split second later, four other wolves followed. They were chocolate brown, grey with black spots, sandy and a smaller, leaner grey wolf, who was first to arrive.

Jacob's wolf leaped for Edward, but before he landed, the smaller grey wolf cut him off. She went flying to the side of the room, crashing into the wall, while Jacob merely lost his footing, landing off to one side of Edward. The russet wolf made efforts again to attack, but the other three brought him down. Edward now crouched over me, using his body as a shield from the conflict.

What was happening? Why were Jacob's friends attacking him? And what was he doing here in the first place? I wanted to get up and do something, but I couldn't move. I did the only thing left in my power; I spoke.

"Everyone stop, stop everything! I don't want anyone to get hurt. I'll do everything to try and stop you from getting hurt, even if it kills me!" The room stilled instantly, but no one replied. Well, the wolves couldn't in their current form, so I looked to Edward for answers.

"What's going on, Edward?"

"Jacob has completely lost control of himself! He is a danger to you, his family, his friends, and to himself!" The rest of the pack growled and bared their teeth at Edward. The russet wolf stood alone on the other side of room, behind the four that formed a wall between him and us. He paced back and forth, his eyes never leaving Edward. He was a predator stalking his prey. "They followed Jacob here to stop him. They were unable to reason with him because his mind was not responsive to human thoughts. He has finally turned into the animal I always knew him to be!" Edward hissed.

The wolves snarled and snapped in Edward's direction. They looked ready to attack him, but as they crouched to pounce the brown, sandy, and grey spotted wolves turned around, their backs to me, as the smaller grey one stepped forward.

It was the strangest and most magical sight. In the span of one or two seconds, the wolf blurred and heat emanated from it as it appeared to implode. Colors converged together and swirled in a maelstrom of energy and light. Before I knew what had happened, the wolf was gone and a naked Leah Clearwater stood before us. Ah, that would be why the "boys" had turned their backs.

Without saying a word, or making any attempts at modesty, she reached down, untied a pouch from her ankle and slipped on a tank top and shorts.

"You, Mr. Sucks-a-lot, are a crappy interpreter!" Leah announced, then looked at me, ignoring Edward's scowl. "Jake changed without knowing it. I was on patrol when it happened, and I didn't 'feel' him like I normally do. Something took over, like he knew you were in danger. Are you in danger?"

"N-no. Not that I know of…"

Leah looked at Edward suspiciously. "Was he up to something? Did _anything_ happen that was…unexpected?"

I felt the red, hot flush take over my face, but I still made an effort to lie. I couldn't say in front of all these people that Edward had finally let me go beyond first base! "No." Leah saw right through me. She gave me a doubtful look and raised an eyebrow at me.

"Okay, if you say so. Jacob's calming down, now that he sees you're okay. We're going to go. Where's your car? We didn't see it outside."

"Rosalie drove me here," I answered as Edward handed me a set of car keys.

"You are welcome to borrow my car, Bella, as long as Jacob is not in there with you."

"I'll go with her." Leah wasn't asking. She took the keys from my hand.

The other wolves made their way out of the house, the three smaller ones nudging the russet wolf to move. They ran into the woods, disappearing into the night. Leah put her arm around me and led me out the door. I looked back at Edward. He was looked at me with regret and longing.

"Goodbye, Bella. Remember, what I have told you tonight," he said as we left.

I directed Leah into the garage, where she clicked the key and slid into the driver's seat of the Volvo. I didn't bother asking to drive. It would have been a wasted effort. I noticed she didn't have a seatbelt on. I sighed and strapped myself in.

That's when she took me by surprise. She leaned over and put her nose to my mouth, inhaling. Next, her hands grazed my body, not quite touching. I was stunned and froze, unable to react. "You two were making out, and he felt you up. I wonder if that's why…" She wasn't talking to me, but I replied anyway.

"That's none of your business. I've respected your privacy when you've asked for it. I'd appreciate it if you would return the favor."

"It _is_ my business when Jake's actions make my damn head explode! Do you know what it's like to have a feral animal that you can 'hear' explode in your head? That happened because of _you_. Jake felt like something was going to happen that would change _everything_. Not just to his life, but _all_ of our lives. What the _hell_ were the two of you going to do? What _could_ the two of you do that would affect _all_ of us?" I shrugged. As devastating as it would have been for me and Edward to have kept going, I couldn't imagine it would change the lives of anyone other than Jacob, myself, and Edward.

"So, what was it that Sam said to you over at the Cullens' house that day we went over the Volturi conditions?" I asked, throwing the ball in her court. We'd see how much she enjoyed having others in her love life. Leah raised an eyebrow at me, but she answered.

"He apologized, again. Like that makes any difference at this point. Sometimes I wish he'd do something dick headed, so I can belt him already." Leah began driving down the main road, speeding like the Cullens usually did. "Don't get off topic. We were talking about _you_."

"There's nothing more to say. You guessed correctly, but I stopped it before it went any further. Before all of you arrived, I might add."

"Well, aren't you just the angel of restraint." Leah made a fast, quick turn forcing me to grab hold of the dashboard. "I still don't get it. Are they leaving?"

"Yes. He asked me to come with them, and reminded me that I can change my mind anytime I wanted to." No answer. "Aren't you going to ask me what I said?"

"I don't need to. You're here, aren't you?"

"What's happening to Jake?"

"I don't know, but I have a couple of theories." I waited, giving her one of her own signature "well, spit it out already" looks. "I think the Alpha in him is itching to get out and it doesn't like being repressed. I also think maybe Jake might have some sort of special ability, like the leeches. Maybe it's because he's Alpha, although there're no legends about that… It's like he's got this sixth sense about you. I get that you stopped whatever was happening between you and Cullen but Jake, man. He was fine with you going over there. Well, as fine as he was ever going to be about it, but then he got so ansty. He was all pent up to the point where he _had_ to get out and phase. Luckily, Quil and Seth went with him. Embry and I were on patrol but we were in his mind once it happened. It was fucking freaky!

"You know, the whole time he was running over here, we couldn't read his thoughts. I mean, we could _hear_ them, but not _decipher_ them. It was like he didn't know where he was running to. He was just…running. There was something pulling him here. Anyhow, the feeling went away once we got to the house, then Jake wanted to kill your ex for the usual jealous boyfriend reasons. Whatever it was, it went away. There's something about Cullen that pushes Jake. It's more than him being a leech, or your ex. It's like Cullen wielded the power to ruin Jake's life, somehow make him unable to do what he wanted with it. Do you think Eddie can project things into people's minds, not just read them?"

"No. I mean, none of the Cullens ever mentioned that, and I don't think it's something he, or any of them, would keep from me. They've been together for a long time. If he had more abilities, they'd know by now." I looked out the window at the scenery flashing past us. I was envious that Leah knew Jacob so well, maybe better than I did. "I wish I could be in Jake's head. It would be nice to feel what he feels, so I'd know what to do to make everything okay."

"Trust me, you don't want to be in anyone's head, especially his. He screams when he thinks, and he has this way of dwelling on all the angst he can think up. He's a close second to me when it comes to annoying-people-to-share-your-thoughts-with. And I'm the bitter chick whose fiancé dumped her for her cousin! Okay, this is where we part ways," Leah announced. I looked around and noticed we were at Jake's house, parked outside his makeshift garage.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going back home. Jake's waiting for you in there," she answered, nodding towards the garage. "Don't worry, he's calmed down. Go, he's being a whiny pathetic sap again." She gave me a little nudge and reached across me, opening my door. I got out of the car the same time she did. Leah waved goodbye and ran across the yard, disappearing into the forest on the other side. From my side, I heard Jacob calling me.

"Bells?"

I peered into the darkness and saw a tall figure standing in the doorway. "Jake?" The moment the word left my lips I was engulfed in a warm embrace. "Are you okay?" I asked into his chest.

"I'm okay now. I needed to hold you."

He kissed the top of my head then lifted me up in his arms, pulling me toward the garage where we had once spent so many hours together. At first I felt warm and happy, but then I recalled some of the painful moments during my time "on the lam" and frowned as I looked around.

"I already know. I found out a long time ago from Leah." I looked away. I knew he'd find out, but I was still ashamed. "It's okay, Bells. You were in a dark place back then. Leah understands, too. She didn't even wait until we were phased. She came right out and told me. She was kind of worried about you. I think she likes you." I looked over, surprised. Jacob chuckled. "You should feel privileged. She doesn't like _anyone_ other than Seth, and he's her brother. You can't tell her I said that. Even though she'll find out I told you, you still can't say it out loud. She'll beat me up, and you too. Here, we'll go for a walk along the trail instead."

We made our way into the tree line, hand in hand. A few minutes passed before I brought up the topic I'd been waiting to find answers for tonight.

"Leah told me about what happened tonight…" I began hesitantly.

"Yeah, that."

"She didn't understand. Can you tell me more?"

"I don't know, Bells. I just started getting so anxious. I paced and sweat up a storm at about half past seven." That was when Rosalie had picked me up. "I got this feeling in the pit of my stomach that something was wrong, and that at any minute events would occur that would change things, forever. It was so bad that I decided to go for a run to let off some steam. Lucky for me, Seth and Quil insisted on coming along. I was going to circle around La Push, but as soon as I phased, somehow I lost track of everything and ended up in Forks. I didn't even hear Seth and Quil calling me. It was like the wolf took over. I felt like I wasn't human anymore. It was like…" Jacob stopped and ran his hands through his hair nervously.

"It was like what, Jake?"

"It was just like that day I hit him…"

"When you hit Edward? I don't understand." I had almost forgotten about that hit he got in. So much had happened since that night. Jacob got a frantic, worried look on his face.

"Yeah. I didn't want to tell you because it kind of scared me. The reason why Edward couldn't read my mind was because there was nothing to read. I wasn't thinking at all. The wolf completely took over and acted out of instinct. _I _didn't even know what had happened until after the fact. I guess it's sort of like blinking. We all do it, but no one _thinks_ about doing it." Jacob grabbed me and held me closely. "Sometimes, Bells, it feels like my body finds it easier to be a wolf than human." I pushed myself away enough to look up at Jacob's face and stroked his cheek.

"I'll never let that happen to you. _You'll_ never let that happen to you. Jake, you're so full of love. There's no way you could _ever_ lose your humanity." Jacob leaned down and kissed me gently. We parted but remained with our faces so close they almost touched.

"It's okay, Jake. Everything's okay."

"_You_ make everything okay," he replied. "The minute I saw you in that house, Bells, it was like I finally knew where I was going." Jacob let go of me and peered over my shoulder. He walked over to a flat spot in front of a tree and sat down, pulling me down with him. "Everything feels better now. It's weird. When this was happening I felt powerless, but now I feel like I have complete control over everything. It's like I've been released from shackles and chains."

I found my place on his lap, leaning back onto his bare chest. He wrapped his arms around me and we sat in silence, enjoying each others' company. Jacob's hands were moving slowly, up and down my arms. I felt that hollow void inside me again, and my body yearned for closeness. Again—just as it had with Edward earlier—my body moved with a will of its own. I turned until I was wrapped around Jacob, my face so close to his that I could feel his breath. We kissed as my legs wound around his waist, and my arms embraced him.

"Bella, I love you," Jacob whispered against my neck, before he kissed it.

"Jacob, I _want_ you," I whispered back, as I became besieged by desire.

Jacob stopped and put both hands on either side of my face, so I was forced to look right at him.

"Bells, what are you saying to me?"

"I _want_ you, Jacob—right now." I put my palm flat on his chest and slowly glided it down his abdomen to the waistline of his shorts. Jacob's breath hitched, and he grabbed my wrist, stopping my descent.

"I don't know if this is the right time, right after…" I was close enough to see him gulp, even in the darkness.

"Well, _I_ know it's right." And I _did_ know because this time it wasn't just my body yearning. All my thoughts were working with every movement my body made. My head didn't ache and no voice screamed at me to stop. Everything seemed right, except for the concerned look on Jacob's face. I smiled as I reached up to touch his cheek.

"Jake, I'm alright now. You don't have to worry about me anymore. I know who am and what I want. What I want right now, and always, is _you_. _Only_ you." I leaned forward and kissed Jacob. He moved with me as he leaned back. We slowly descended together onto the garage floor.

As I lay on top of Jacob, I could smell his musky scent that always reminded me of the fresh Washington breeze. We were together and everything was right. The emptiness was gone, and I was finally whole.

* * *

><p><em>Okay, Journey to a New Day ends here; however, there is a sequel.<em>

_Why a sequel you ask? Because, the story of Jacob and Bella within this universe is not finished; however, I couldn't lengthen this story. Bella had made her choice, and the confrontation with the Volturi over her existence has come to a conclusion. That was what this story was about. Everything else will - along with a few new developments - be addressed in the next story._

_The sequel is called: Every Rose has its Thorn and is also posted here._

_Thanks everyone for reading my fic, and a special thanks to all those who left reviews! This, my first fiction writing experience, has been great, and now I'm a certifiable fanfic writing addict!_

_I would LOVE to hear from you. Reviews have been pretty scarce for this story, and it's not a very nice thing for a writer. :( _

_I reply to all reviews!_


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